


Ditto

by AradiaFirehawk



Category: Glee
Genre: F/F
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-02-10
Updated: 2015-11-21
Packaged: 2018-01-11 21:31:58
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 19
Words: 70,865
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1178153
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AradiaFirehawk/pseuds/AradiaFirehawk
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Rachel Berry is the perfect person for Santana Lopez. Now Santana just has to realize that. Set after Santana slaps Finn in Season 3. This is a slightly AU story. See disclaimer for more details. Rated for later chapters.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. She Couldn't Wait

Disclaimer: I do not own Glee or any of its characters; those belong to Ryan Murphy et al. I do, however, borrow those characters for this story. If you are not a fan of Pezberry, please go somewhere else. If you don't like girl-on-girl, look away. However, if you are a fan of both of those things (and almost definitely some Finn-bashing) then please proceed.

This story is slightly AU in that I changed a couple of events to fit the direction my version of the characters took me. I love Brittana, but obviously they do not really fit in line with a Pezberry fic, so in this world Brittany never broke up with Artie at the end of season 2. Santana still slept with Finn and he still lied to Rachel, but she never cheated on him with Puck. They did lose at Nationals, but only because Finn kissed Rachel and she proceeded to slap him once they got off-stage, and just because I think it was a stupid turn of events, Quinn did not go crazy punk. Finally, this takes place pretty much where it did in Glee, but the only difference is that Brittana is not together when Finn outs Santana for being in love with her.

Sorry, that was a long intro. Assume anything I did not mention is something I changed for the story or created because it fits, or that it just is not relevant to my tale. Thanks and read on! Please review (constructively).

* * *

 

Chapter 1: "She Couldn't Wait"

Santana stood there, staring at the one place in the world she  _really_ wished she did not have to be right now. However, she knew one thing for sure: if she did not walk through those doors today, the day after her world crumpled around her, she would never be able to recover. Not emotionally, fuck that, she was Santana Lopez and this was just a blip on her radar, but if she failed now, her reputation at McKinley would never recover.

"All right, bitch, pull your shit together and move your feet. You're from Lima Heights Adjacent and all these people are just sheep. You don't care jack-shit about what they think."

With that said, Santana Lopez put on her best HBIC glare, lifted her head high and walked through the front doors of McKinley High School.

As she walked down the hallway, people parted like they normally did, knowing that if they failed to move fast enough Santana would squash them like a bug. However, there were definitely more stares than normal, and a whole hell of a lot more whispering as she passed. Steeling herself against the nausea that she was too bad-ass to admit she was truly feeling, Santana opened her locker and began to pull out the books she needed. God, she really wished Brittany was there to help her through this. Her best friend was still deliriously happy with Wheels, and while Santana had hated her for a long time for rejecting her, she knew that there was nothing more she could do to win her back. Brittany had the biggest heart in the world, and Santana had been banking on that: meaning she would wait for her forever. She hadn't counted on Brittany's heart being so big that she would fall in love with someone else.

Shaking her head to snap out of her memories, of the look in Brittany's eyes as she told her she was in love with Artie, Santana gathered her books, slammed her locker closed, and turned around. That's when it hit. The event itself was not out of the ordinary. No, just something that happens every day at McKinley: someone got slushied. However, this time, the event silenced everyone in the vicinity, because this time, the slushy hit  _Santana_  full in the face.

Time seemed to stop and everyone held their breath as the hockey jocks burst out laughing. "Maybe you can get your girlfriend to lick it off, dyke!" They high-fived each other and kept walking down the hall – mostly out of self-preservation. They had seen Santana after someone had made fun of Brittany: there was not much left of the idiot afterword. Santana just stood there and her eyes started to burn. At first, she thought,  _Fuck, that stuff really does sting when it gets in your eyes!_  With dawning horror, she realized that she was starting to tear up, not from pain, but from the desire to cry. Sure, she cried when she was drunk, but that could be laughed off as an effect of the alcohol. This-this could not be explained away. This would only be seen as one thing: weakness.

As she was gathering herself to pick her books up off the floor and trying not to look anyone in the eye, someone swept by her and grabbed her arm, quickly pulling her into the bathroom. Her books were set down by the sink and a wet paper towel started to dab at her face and neck. After a few minutes, she was shocked to realize that the person was trying to lift off her shirt.

"Hey, Hobbit, hands off the goodies!"

"I'm sorry, Santana, but I thought you might want to change your outfit before your shirt starts to dry. Slushie is very sticky, and I speak from experience when I say it is not a good idea to wait until later to change."

Santana blinked as Rachel handed her what suspiciously looked like her extra Cheerios uniform, the one she kept in her gym locker. "Where'd you get this, midget?"

"I asked Coach Sylvester yesterday afternoon if I could borrow it, in the event that this might happen. She actually acquiesced quite willingly, which at first was surprising, but then I suppose she feels partly responsible for the situation that you are in."

Santana glared at Rachel and grabbed the paper towel she was holding. "Situation?"

"Santana, you are currently speaking to the girl who was slushied every day for most of her high school career. Now, I maintain that much of that was due to misplaced jealousy, as I will be leaving much of this small town behind, but I also know that the fact that my fathers are gay played a part in it."

As Rachel started wetting more paper towels, Santana stared at her. She actually had something in common with  _Rachel Berry_. When she shivered, she thought at first it was due to her shock at this revelation, but then she shivered again and realized that it was because the slushy was starting to make her really cold.

"Yeah, whatever, Berry. Hand over the uniform." Santana removed her Cheerios top. At least, she attempted to. However, the slushy had already started to dry, and it really was getting almost impossible to remove the material from her body as it had begun to mold the material to her body. As she struggled, Rachel stepped forward and gripped the base of her shirt. "What did I say about the goodies, Berry?"

"I believe your exact words were 'Hey, Hobbit, hands off the goodies!' which is actually rather inaccurate and unfair, since you really are only 3 inches or so taller than me. I am also rather average in height for most women, so I have always found your nicknames for me with regard to my height or lack thereof pretty nonsensical and misplaced. However, in response to your original question about your 'goodies', I am actually attempting to hold your shirt down in the front, so that it is easier for you to grip the sides and pull it up over your head. Would you prefer I just sit back and watch you struggle with it alone? Speaking from experience, it is really very difficult to attempt on your own."

Processing that  _incredibly_  long paragraph Berry just recited, Santana blinked and then mumbled out a reluctant "Fine." With that said, she allowed Rachel to once again grip the front of her uniform shirt while she gripped the sides. She slowly slid it up and off her body, and as she did so she could swear she saw Berry close her eyes and take in a deep breath, as if being near her was some sort of struggle. Shrugging it off – after all, there was slushy all over her and she wanted to get it cleaned off as soon as possible – she stepped back and slid off her Cheerios skirt. Reaching her hand out, she took more of the wet paper towels from the brunette's hand and finished rinsing her body off as well as she could. She would shower later in the Cheerios locker room, but for now she had to show she could recover from an event like this, and she refused to look weak in front of the entire school by trying to sneak out of the bathroom still covered in slushie.

She grabbed the clean uniform and was fully dressed once more in minutes. As she straightened her newly damp ponytail she thought,  _Damn it's a pain to get that shit out of my hair_. She glanced in the mirror at Rachel and said: "You didn't have to help, and God knows I've done some bad shit to you including getting you slushied like this. So…thanks."

Rachel smiled. "I'd like to think that we've gotten closer over the last three years, Santana. We haven't always agreed and I am not completely blameless, since I did call you a stripper once, but I know that if I really needed it, you would be there for me too."

"Yeah, well, we need your voice for Nationals, and I would be lying if I didn't tell you that your annoying ability to push us in Glee is actually mildly helpful in the long run. Just don't tell anyone I said that, or I'mma cut a bitch."

Berry smirked, actually smirked, and said, "Sure, Santana. I won't say a word. I know you've got those razor blades in your hair."

As Santana made ready to leave the bathroom they had been holed up in for almost an entire period now, Rachel reached out and took her wrist in a small but firm grip. Cocking an eyebrow and waiting to see what would come next out of this weird experience, Santana saw Rachel pause and swallow. She then looked up at her very seriously and whispered, "Don't forget, Santana, you have people who care about you."

"Of course, I'm hot shit. Everyone wants up on this."

"Seriously, Santana, just because Brittany is with Artie—that doesn't mean she doesn't care."

Santana ripped her wrist away and snarled, "What do you know, Berry? You don't know shit about my relationship with Brittany."

"I know that it hurts when the person you love rejects you, and it makes you feel like you have no one else. But you do. We're all here for you Santana."

"Sure, Berry, you're here for me, especially since I took Finnocence's V-card and ruined your relationship. You're  _totally_ there for me."

"You may have been a part of it, Santana, but that does not change the fact that Finn lied to me about it afterward, even when I told him the truth about Jessie and me. Was I mad at you for the occurrence and for how you told me? Yes, but upon further reflection your revelation was just one of many issues that Finn and I had. You simply helped me see them."

Santana just stared at her. "I don't get you. I really don't."

"You don't have to, Santana. You just have to know that I, and the rest of the Glee club-"

"Minus Finn."

"Okay, minus Finn, but I really think he just hasn't thought about the consequences of his actions, of how he uses his words, and I really don't think he meant to out you to the whole school, let alone the whole town-"

"Berry!"

Taking a deep breath, Rachel squared her shoulders. "I apologize. What I was trying to say is that we are all here for you. Please know that. You are not alone."

"Yeah, yeah, whatever, Berry. I gotta get to class or Coach will kick my ass if she hears I'm slacking off on my school work. If I don't attend classes then I don't stay on the squad.  _No me gusta_."

As Santana turned to leave, she paused before opening the door and said, "Rachel?"

Rachel snapped her head up. Santana never called her by her first name. "Yes?"

After a long moment, Santana looked up into her eyes and said, "Ditto," and with that she spun around and was gone.

Rachel stood there for a few minutes more and then, slowly, she let a smile slip out. Others might not have understood that one word, but Rachel did. With that one word, Santana Lopez had acknowledged, thanked, and returned her offer of support. As her hand still tingled from where she had held Santana's wrist, Rachel could not help thinking that things were only going to get more interesting before graduation.

She couldn't wait.


	2. Baby Steps

Disclaimer: I still do not own  _Glee_ ; it is the property of Ryan Murphy and Twentieth Century Fox Television, among others. I wish I did own it, there would be  _way_  more girl-on-girl kissing in the show if I did.

* * *

Chapter 2: Baby Steps

Santana ducked into the library during her lunch period. She wasn't that hungry and all the eyes staring at her just made her appetite worse. It had been a week of this: she put on a brave face when she walked around school, but whenever Santana got the chance she would find someplace to go where no one would think to look for her. On Tuesday it was under the bleachers (and she had to kick those Skanks out from under there, so it was almost more effort than it was worth). Wednesday was the auditorium, but too many Glee kids would be in and out of there all day, and she couldn't stand to see their looks of pity. Finally, it was Friday, and she thought of the one place that hardly any of the student population of McKinley High ever went: the library.

Oddly enough, Santana did not feel the need to hide her identity from anyone who was already close to her. Santana's parents had been so much better about all of this than she had feared. They told her they were truly sorry that her life would be harder, but they understood that being gay was something she couldn't control. The hardest part of the whole conversation was when she finally got up the nerve to ask them if they still loved her. Her mother immediately took her into her arms, and her father wrapped his arms around both of them. "Of  _course_ we still love you,  _mija._ Don't ever doubt that we will  _always_  love you." At those words, Santana had broken down, and they had all just stood there holding one another. The tableau was broken when her ass-hat of an older brother, Antonio (who was a college student in Columbus but was home for a break), came in and shouted, "What is this, a love-fest? Where's my bad-ass little sis?"

He'd hugged her when she told him as well, though he admitted he'd known for a long time since he had seen the way that she acted around Brittany. Flinching when he mentioned her name, Santana managed to recover quickly enough, which is when she finally realized that he had let her freak out about telling him and he had known all along! She hit him in the shoulder for that and chased him around thehouse shouting "Tony! Get the hell back here so I can properly kick your ass!", while her parents sighed and shook their heads at the antics of their two children. They'd ended the night all hanging out in the living room watching TV together, and Santana had never felt safer or more loved.

Despite her family's support, outside of school was even worse, because the adults in this small-ass town were even bigger judgmental asses than their kids were. She'd managed to mostly stay indoors, but even the drive home got her way more looks than she liked. Snapping out of her memories of the last couple of days, Santana shook her head and thought,  _Fuck them. I don't need any of them. I have my family, and soon I'll tell mi abuela, and I'll be gone from this shit-hole in less than a year._ With that encouraging thought, Santana turned the corner around one of the bookshelves and saw the one person she had  _really_ been avoiding this week: Rachel Berry.  _Just my fucking luck._

She must have made a slight noise while thinking this, because before she could try to make an escape, Rachel looked up.

"Santana, how are you?"

"Fine, midget. What are you doing here?"

"Well, this," she said, pointing to the book she was holding, "is a  _book_ , which you can sometimes find within the room you are currently in, also known as  _the library_. I am reading it, which is usually what one does with books. What are you doing in here? I didn't think you knew where the library was."

Santana was about to go off on Rachel when she noticed the small smile on her face.  _Did Berry just tease me? What sort of alternate universe have I landed in this week?_ "Yeah, yeah, I'll have you know I currently have an A- average – and before you ask, no, it's not just in Spanish – and I read books too, when I feel like it. I just figured you spend every free moment singing when you're not using that trap to tell us,  _again_ ,how awesome you are."

Rachel smiled, "While I do find that most of my free time can be better spent continuing to perfect my vocals, every once-in-awhile I am tempted to branch out."

Santana snorted, "Right, 'cause you need to 'perfect' your vocals."

"Was that an inadvertent compliment, Santana? Careful, someone might hear you and think you're going soft."

"Eh, I'll just smack 'em down like the little lemmings they are." Santana slumped into a chair across from Rachel, realized that she was tired of standing, and that since they had already started talking she really couldn't run away without losing face (at least in her own mind). After a slight pause that almost became awkward, Santana asked, "So, what're you reading?"

Rachel lifted her book and Santana's jaw dropped: It was an autobiography. That in itself was not odd, but the author and subject was what had Santana's eyebrows rising toward her hairline: Berry was reading  _The Way I Am_ , by Eminem. "Really?"

Rachel laughed, "What, you thought it would be a Barbra Streisand book? I'll admit, I do read those books as well, but I have a passion for many types of books, and Eminem is a fascinating man and a profound lyricist."

Bursting out laughing for the first time in a long while, Santana said, "Leave it to you to make Eminem sound classy. You can't just say he kicks ass and you like his music?"

"What fun would that be?"

Rachel shrugged, but Santana was beginning to realize that Rachel Berry liked to poke fun at people way more than Santana originally thought. It was only now that she had a chance to see the mocking up close that it was becoming more and more obvious.

"Well, just as long as you don't go around telling people that 'you're gonna pop-a-cap in their ass' or anything, it's all good."

Rachel looked shocked, "Of course not, Santana! It is clearly your job to 'cut a bitch' when necessary. I wouldn't want to get in the way of you being able to make use of those  _hojas de afeitar_  in your hair."

"When the hell did you learn to say "razor blades" in Spanish?"  _Jesus, Berry just keeps fucking surprising the shit out of me!_

"Well, while Mr. Schue is a moderately decent Glee teacher, he's terrible with Spanish as I'm sure you've noticed. Due to his – and the school's – total inability to realize this, I was forced to take extensive courses outside of McKinley. I have a number of different languages in my repertoire as I have taken language classes – along with dance classes, theater classes, and singing classes – my whole life. You never know when you might need a foreign language for a play, and of course, I know extensive Hebrew and Yiddish. However, I would be lying if I did not mention that I have made sure to perfect my Spanish so that I can realistically be aware of how close you are to truly trying to kill me. Plus, I did dream at one point that I might be able to throw insults back at you in Spanish, but I've never gotten up the courage."

"Well, I haven't tried to kill you in a while, so I suppose you're safe." Santana was more (grudgingly) impressed every minute by how much she really didn't know about Berry.

"Yes, I have not needed my Spanish to defend myself against you in quite some time; though I don't think even knowing Spanish would have protected Finn from the slap you laid on him last week."

Santana froze. This was not okay. They could talk about some things, but not this. Santana was not ready for this. "Back off, Berry."

Rachel sighed, "It's okay, Santana. You don't have to tell me anything unless you want to. I was just making a comment about Finn's inability to dodge small girls with big vendettas against him. It's not too surprising though. He is pretty tall so I'm guessing that probably makes him slower to react."

Santana breathed a sigh of relief as she realized that Berry was going to let them shift the topic elsewhere than her breakdown. "Hey, I'm nowhere near as short as you, Berry! It is pretty funny that he doesn't ever seem to see it coming though. Do you remember the time that his face slammed into the door when he tripped over his own feet? That was…"

Rachel sighed and nodded along with Santana's story, not really focused on the words but rather on the fact that Santana was talking to her like a normal person. She had hoped to be able to get her to open up more about "the incident," but she supposed it would take more than two real conversations for Santana to allow herself to be vulnerable. For now, Rachel was going to enjoy listening to her voice and hopefully get Santana to smile again. When she had burst out laughing earlier, Rachel's breath had caught in her throat. Santana had such an addictive laugh, and Rachel could only hope that she would get to hear it at least once more today.  _Baby steps, Rachel, baby steps._

* * *

Author's note: The autobiography is by Eminem and it is published by Plume. I do not own any part of it.

Additionally, I know some basic Spanish, Japanese, Ancient Greek, Italian, and a couple of Hebrew and Yiddish words. Therefore the Spanish I use in this will most often be translated by Google Translate so I apologize in advance if I mercilessly butcher the Spanish language. I am trying to pepper the story with Spanish where I think it might make the most sense for Santana and her family who are supposed to be fluently bilingual. Plus, it is fun to throw in a phrase or two for Rachel every once-in-awhile.

Please review!


	3. Too Bad-ass For That

Disclaimer:  _Glee_? Still not mine. Still owned by Ryan Murphy et al, but what can you do? At least I get to play with the characters for a little while.

* * *

Chapter 3: "Too bad-ass for that"

It had happened twice already in one week, so Santana was really not surprised at all when she kept running into Rachel Berry everywhere she went. At first, she was sure that Berry was stalking her, trying to have her open her heart and cry out all her feelings onto her shoulder. That would probably be followed closely by a rendition of an uplifting Barbra Streisand song about "rising above" or some such shit. Then she kicked herself for her own stupidity: they lived in  _Lima, Ohio._  You could spit and hit ten people you knew (ironically, Santana had totally done that at a church function one time. It was fucking hilarious).

This "no-shit-Sherlock" realization did not change the fact that Santana and Rachel could not escape running into one another on a day-to-day basis, which is how they ended up where they were right now. Santana was sitting across from Rachel at the Lima Bean coffee shop, and for the second time in the last week, she was the one covered in a drink, not Rachel.

"I really am terribly sorry, Santana. I had no idea you were in line right behind me. If I had known, I would not have turned quite so suddenly, causing you to spill both our drinks all over you."

"Berry, it's fine. You didn't see me. I get it. You're short and probably couldn't see over your coffee cup, so I'll let it slide."

"I'll have you know, Santana, I had them specially order coffee cups that are small enough to see over. Maybe you failed to see me turn over your generous…"

Santana laughed out loud, which was something she had been doing a lot of lately around Rachel. "Were you just going to say that I couldn't see you over my tits?"

"Well, I probably would not have used the word 'tits,' but they are quite decently sized, even if they are…"

"Wow, I managed to leave Rachel Berry grasping for words. "'Fake,' Berry. The word is fake, or I guess you'd probably say 'augumented.' It's okay though. You can talk about them. I'm not ashamed."

"Then why did you get done...if I may ask?"

Santana started to speak and then paused. Rachel reassured her, "I won't tell anyone, I promise. Whatever we talk about stays in confidence, Santana."

"The summer before junior year I went to the doctor and they found a lump." At Rachel's stricken expression, Santana held her hand up and said, "Before you freak out on me, it wasn't cancer, but they did have to remove it. It was large enough that if they didn't do some kind of reconstructive surgery I would look really odd, so when given the option, I asked to get both of them increased in size. Not Pamela Anderson-big, but enough to make me feel more confident."

"You always seemed  _incredibly_  sure of yourself, Santana, especially with regard to your body."

"That's just it. My body was my way of getting people to like me. I'm a bitch; we all know it, and my hotness factor opens doors for me. A lopsided boob or a scar on top of my breasts the size they used to be would have knocked me down the social ladder too much. Of course, Quinn took care of that anyway by letting Sue know I got the boob job, but I did what I thought I had to do to stay on top."

After a long pause, Rachel softly asked, "Do you regret it?"

Santana thought about it for longer than she had in a while and then firmly said, "No, I like my body. I always have, but  _I_ decide what makes me beautiful. I made the choice to get my boobs done past the necessary surgery. I don't have boobs large enough to hurt my back or make people feel like they're going blind when they look at me, so who cares if a few people think I'm a little self-involved?"

There was a bit of an awkward pause after that, but then Rachel whispered, "I think you're beautiful."

When she saw that Santana was getting even more uncomfortable, Rachel lifted her head up higher and said through a smirk, "Though that could be because there is coffee all over your chest so your 'assets' are quite distinctive right now."

Santana gaped at her, "Rachel! You did not just check out my chest!"

"No, not just now, but I was just pointing out that you might want to change your shirt soon, so that the boys coming in and out of the coffee shop stop tripping over their own feet."

Santana looked around and, sure enough, at least two teen boys were checking her out and another one was definitely drooling into his coffee. She smirked and stretched her arms above her head, arching her back and moaning a little. Five seconds later, the boy who had been drooling slipped off his chair and had to run to the bathroom to clean himself up after he spilled his coffee in his lap.

"Ha! Did you see the way he was holding his jacket in front of himself? He's definitely not going to the bathroom to just wash his pants off."

"You are incorrigible, Santana Lopez. You did that on purpose."

"Of course. If little creeps can't handle what they're staring at, then they shouldn't be staring in the first place."

Glancing up under her eyelashes and then quickly glancing away, Santana could have sworn she heard Rachel mumble, "Damn straight."

This conversation began the first of many meetings at the Lima Bean between Santana and Rachel. At first, Santana tried to play if off and act like she was totally not trying to run into Rachel. By the third week of multiple coffee shop trips that just happenedto be when they were both there, Santana could no longer deny the truth: she and Rachel were teens who hung out together for fun. They were friends.

This revelation was fine, in moderation. However, one afternoon near the end of the third week of their friendship, they had a few visitors, and Santana wasn't sure she was comfortable with that. They were sitting next to each other in their usual comfy chairs when Kurt and Blaine walked in. Looking around for somewhere to sit, the boys finally noticed Santana and Rachel. Once Kurt's eyeballs went back into their sockets and Blaine's eyebrows came down from his hairline (with a little more gel in them after making the trip), they walked over to the two girls with their coffees in hand.

Kurt cleared his throat and said, "Rachel, Santana, I didn't know you two frequented the Lima Bean."

"Yes, well, Santana and I ran into one another (Santana snorted) here a few weeks ago and the rest—"

"Is none of your business. Now move along."

"Santana, don't be rude to our fellow teammates and friends."

"Riiiight. Well, if you are all going to skip along together down the yellow-brick-road of musical delight, I'm out. My coffee's cold anyway."

Santana got up to leave, but as she brushed past Rachel's seat, she reached out and tugged on Santana's fingers. Looking down, Santana couldn't look away from Rachel's eyes. Rachel didn't say anything; she just smiled a little bit and gave a tug on Santana's fingers. Santana rolled her eyes. "Fine, I'll stay. The second we start talking about Mr. Schue, I'm out of here. It's the weekend. I don't need that shit right now."

Rachel laughed and handed her coffee to Santana to try. The Latina slumped back into the chair next to Rachel and took a big swig. "You know what's really crazy?"

"What?" Rachel asked.

"I'm starting to enjoy this vegan coffee you drink."

"It's just soy milk instead of regular milk, Santana."

"Yeah, but you can totally tell it's not from a cow, so it definitely doesn't taste as awesome."

Rachel just rolled her eyes at Santana and snatched her coffee back. "Fine, if you don't want any more of my beverage whose ingredients were not stolen from an innocent bovine…"

Santana stole the coffee once more and smirked over the edge. "I didn't say that."

Kurt and Blaine could only watch the back and forth between the two girls play out in front of them. When they saw Santana smile at Rachel in just the right way, and Rachel smile back like she never did with Finn, Puck, or Jesse, they knew one thing for sure: this was more than a friendship. They weren't sure how much more, but it was definitely entertaining to watch.

In fact, Kurt and Blaine soon became regular additions to the Lima Bean hangouts, which went from twice a week to almost every day. The four of them would all stroll in around the same time. Rachel and Santana would initially dance this entrance  _pas de deux_  separately. Over time, the girls gradually entered the Bean together, though usually with Kurt and Blaine in tow to cut the slowly mounting tension. They would all plop down into the four comfy chairs in the corner and spend the afternoon studying, chatting, and even talking about Glee. Santana finally allowed the Glee talk after a heated debate over who got the last scone. Santana was starving, so she got the scone, but only because Rachel was allowed to talk about Glee at least once each time the group hung out.

One afternoon, Santana was sitting in one of the plushy chairs next to Rachel and across from Kurt when she noticed the Other Warbler bugging Blaine. As Sebastian moved closer and closer encroaching on Blaine's personal space, Santana could see Blaine was getting more and more uncomfortable. Thankfully, Kurt hadn't noticed yet, but Rachel—who was in the same line of sight as Santana—was definitely starting to get upset. Jumping up, Santana snuck up behind the navy-blazered and seemingly silver-tongued boy and hooked her arm around Sebastian's shoulder. "We got a problem here, Blaine?"

Blaine visibly relaxed when he noticed the way Sebastian was cringing under the pressure Santana was apparently applying to his arm. "Sebastian was just having trouble remembering that I have a boyfriend."

"It also looked like you were having a little trouble with the idea of personal space, Sebastian. Didn't your mom ever teach you that no means no, OW?"

"OW? Who or what is OW?" Sebastian looked really confused.

"OW, that's what I call you. It stands for Other Warbler. It's also the noise you're gonna make when I kick you between the legs, which is what I'm gonna do the next time you bother my boy Blaine here. He's the only Warbler I want to see in here for a while. Get me?" Santana followed her final statement up with another hard squeeze to Sebastian's shoulder.

Sebastian cringed and left quickly as he tried rather desperately to make it seem that he was not running away to protect his ability to procreate. Santana chuckled and looped her arm companionably through Blaine's. "Tell anyone I did that and you will be singing like Kurt for a while."

Blaine nodded, very surprised but pleased that Santana Lopez had come to his defense. Once they sat back down, it was apparent that Kurt had not seen any of the argument, thankfully. However, as Blaine grasped Kurt's hand and took another sip of his coffee, he couldn't help noticing that Rachel smiled in that special way once more and affectionately nudged Santana's boot with her own.

Santana just smiled and nodded her head, acknowledging that Rachel had seen it all. Santana was definitely going soft. As she looked around at her "friends" once more, she finally admitted that she really didn't care. A soft spot or two in her hardened exterior wouldn't break the Latina. She was too bad-ass for that.

* * *

Author's note: Santana's boob job always bothered me because even though she is a teenager with insecurities like everyone else, she never really seemed the type to get a boob job. Also, what parent would let their teenager get cosmetic surgery? (Yes, I know Quinn got a nose job. I'm not terribly thrilled with that either.) I hope this chapter explained my thoughts on the subject and did not offend anyone. Again, reviews are always appreciated.


	4. Verguenza

Disclaimer: I am not the creator or owner of  _Glee._ If I was, Finn would be pretty much non-existent and numbers like  _I Kissed A Girl_  would be much more prevalent. I am not making any money off of this.

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Chapter 4: " _Verguenza"_

Santana felt like her heart was crushing in on her. She couldn't breathe, couldn't think. All she knew was that her world had shifted, and she didn't know which way she should – or could – turn. Why couldn't she breathe? Why was it hard to see? Why did her hands hurt? All she could hear in her head over and over was one word, said in the voice that had sung her lullabies and kissed her skinned knees: V _erguenza_. Shame.

In the six weeks since she had slapped Finn, been slushied, and been befriended by Rachel, a lot had changed. She now got along a lot better with most of the Glee club. Well, she tolerated most of them, and she could admit that she was actually friends with Rachel, Kurt, and Blaine. She still hated Wheels, but she was working to get over her shit and be around him, at least so she and Britt could try to be friends again. It would never be the same. It never could be since Santana had realized that Brittany would never be hers the way she wanted her to be. However, they were getting back to some sort of friendship through Glee, so hopefully they could start hanging out again soon.

Rachel was…Rachel was complicated. She was really not nearly as annoying if you hung out with her one-on-one, and she was funny and kinda beautiful— _Oh, fuck it. You know you have a thing for her. Just admit it already. Jesus._  What was she supposed to do about that though? From her past dating history it was clear that Rachel liked boys. Sure, Rachel's dating history hadn't been very successful: one boy had his team throw raw eggs at her and then cracked one over her head himself (fucking jackass); the other dumped her for kissing someone else then tried to ruin all her hopes and dreams by kissing her on stage during Nationals (he  _said_  not on purpose, but come on!). Still, that didn't mean that Rachel would want to stop driving stick altogether (metaphorically, since she was vocal enough that the entire team knew she was still a virgin).

Rachel  _had_  flirted with Santana shamelessly though, especially in the past week or so. When Santana would ask if Rachel wanted more coffee, Rachel would nod and brush her fingers along Santana's for much longer than was necessary to pass the Latina her coffee card. When they hung out in the choir room and practiced the  _I Kissed A Girl_  number she wanted to perform with the Glee girls for their upcoming assignment, Rachel eyes definitelylingered on Santana's lips. That could have been written off as existing only in Santana's head, but then yesterday she'd said in passing that she always thought that the Cheerios' skirts were the best invention in the world. Santana had looked at her like she was crazy and Rachel's only response was: "There's just something about the way that they hug the female form – particularly in the chest and buttocks area." Santana had spit her coffee all over the table, and as Rachel handed her some napkins to clean up the mess, she whispered, "Plus, nothing shows off legs quite as well as that Cheerios skirt." She uttered that just before bouncing off to get a fresh cup of coffee when, from out of the blue, shewinked at Santana. Winked! If that wasn't flirting, then Santana wasn't an Ellen-loving, girl-obsessed, can't-stop-thinking-about-kissing-Rachel-Berry lesbian.

The question was what should she do about it? Shaking her head, Santana decided not to worry about it for the moment. She had to concentrate on the fact that she was standing in front of her _abuela's_ house and that tonight, finally, Santana was going to tell her that she was gay.

She had thought about it for a long time, but had waited because she wasn't sure she could handle it if her  _abuela_  didn't take it well. She also wasn't sure she needed to mention it until she was actually dating someone. However, after "the incident" six weeks ago, she realized that she couldn't wait much longer. This was a small town and her  _abuela_  would hear it from someone soon. Santana didn't want that; she wanted to tell her herself. She'd even spoken to her mother about telling her  _abuela_  to see what her mom thought she should do. Her mother said, "Santana, she's my mother. I would like to think that her love and support carries through in all things. I believe they do, but if you are really worried about it,  _mija_ , I can speak to her about it myself or go with you?"

"No, I want to handle this myself. We have always been really close. I really want to be honest and open with her on my own terms."

"I understand,  _mija_. Remember though, whatever happens, your father, brother and I love you very much.  _Estás_ _nuestro corazón_."

With the memory of her mother's love and support firmly in her mind, Santana walked into her  _abuela's_  house.

She called out, " _Abuelita_?"

Her  _abuela_  responded by shouting, "In the kitchen, Santana! Come in here and get fed!"

Santana walked into the kitchen and just stood there watching her  _abuela_  putting together food for her. It was a running joke in their family that you had to be hungry to be anywhere within 3 feet of her  _abuela,_  because she always insisted that she make food for you whenever you pulled her away from the sink gently and asked her to sit down because she had to tell her something. Then Santana said slowly and with a little bit of a quiver in her voice, "I have to tell you a secret. It's a secret that I've kept hidden for a long time." When her  _abuela_  interrupted to offer more food, Santana could only ask her to listen, because if she paused for too long she wasn't sure she'd be able to get out what she wanted to say. When Santana was interrupted again by her  _abuela_ asking if she was pregnant,she laughed at that possibility and kept pressing on.

Santana told her  _abuela_  that she was the strongest and bravest person she knew, and then she said it. " _Abuelita_ , I love girls in the way that I'm supposed to feel about boys. It's just something that's always been inside of me, and I really wanted to share that with you because I love you so much. I want you to know me – who I really am."

She paused while trying to figure out how to say the next part. She didn't want to mention Brittany by name, since the girl wasn't really in her life in that way anymore, but she wanted to say _something_ about the way she felt when she was in love with her, because her love for Brittany was the reason that she was finally brave enough to face herself. "I finally understand what people are talking about when they talk about love. I've tried so hard to push this feeling away and keep it locked inside, but everyday just feels like a war. I walk around so mad at the world, but I'm really just fighting with myself. I don't wanna fight anymore. I'm just too tired. I  _have_  to just be me."

Then her world shattered. She couldn't even remember all that her  _Abuelita_  had said. All she could here was that one word over and over: V _erguenza_. Shame. Her  _abuela_ hated her. She was ashamed of her own  _nieta_. Santana couldn't think past that one thought. It was just too all-consuming. She was in pieces, and she didn't know how to put herself back together. Maybe that's why her hands hurt? Then someone was touching her and Santana lashed out.

Rachel ducked just in time to miss her swing, and she caught Santana around her back and arms. "Santana! Tana. You have to stop. Please, just stop."

Santana couldn't understand what Rachel meant at first. Then she realized that she was hitting the ground with her fists over and over, and that the reason she had almost hit Rachel was that she had just continued punching. Luckily she was on the grass, but there were a couple of rocks on the ground. As she lifted her hands, she could see a few cuts across her knuckles. Oh, that's why her hands hurt.

"Tana, let's go, okay? We'll go to your house—"

"NO! I don't want my family to see me like this."

"Okay, then we'll go to my house and get you cleaned up. Come on, you shouldn't stay out here. The grass is damp and it's starting to rain."

As Rachel helped Santana up, the Latina had a thought: "How did you get here, Rach?" (If you'd asked her when they had started shortening each other's names, she'd have told you that she had no idea, but it was actually probably right at that moment.)

"You called me, Tana. All you said was 'I need you.' I asked where you were, but you just kept saying it over and over. I needed to find you, so I called your mother and told her that you had called me but your phone had died, so if she could please let me know where you were and perhaps provide me with a landline number I would greatly appreciate it. It's a good thing we live in a small town, because the second she said you were at your  _abuela's_  I knew exactly where to go. I found you hitting the ground when I got here." Rachel helped Santana into her car and they slowly drove to the Berry residence.

Santana didn't speak the entire drive. When they got to her house, Rachel got out and walked around to open the door for Santana and helped her out of the car. Rachel noticed Santana cringe when she balled her hands into fists, so she reached out and slid her fingers into the Latina's, interlacing them, and led her to the front door. As Rachel reached for her keys, her dad Leroy opened the door to let them in. "Rachel, honey, are you all right? You rushed out of the house so fast that we didn't have time to ask you where you were going." Leroy paused when he noticed that Santana was with his daughter.

Having gotten used to the two girls hanging out together these past number of weeks, it was not a strange thing to see Santana in their home. However, she looked incredibly shell-shocked, and Leroy noticed that her hand (the one not holding onto Rachel for dear life) had some cuts and bruises on it. "Santana! Are you all right, dear?" At Rachel's look which begged him not to ask any more questions right now, Leroy nodded subtly and shouted, "Hiram! We're having a guest for the night. Make sure we have enough for breakfast in the morning." Santana looked up at this statement, startled at their apparent willingness to let her stay over, no questions asked.

Leroy just smiled as Hiram walked into the room. "Who's staying over? Santana! Well, that's just wonderful. Oh, and now you can have you bacon tomorrow, Leroy, since as we know Santana is a carnivore of the highest order."

"Ooh, you're right! Hooray! Santana, I do so love when you come over as my food options greatly improve. You see, Hiram may respect his daughter's food choices and follow them himself, but he is also unwilling to let a guest go hungry."

"Dad, daddy, we all know how much you love having guests over—"

"Not guests, honey! Santana!"

"Fine, having  _Santana_  over, but right now we are both really tired, so we're going to go upstairs and we'll see you in the morning, okay?"

"All right, honey, we love you."

As Santana and Rachel turned to leave, Hiram called out "Santana?" She turned around and he smiled at her. "You're always welcome. Feel better, okay?" She nodded her head and let Rachel pull her up the stairs.

When they got upstairs, Rachel sat her down in the bathroom and cleaned up her hands, washing away the blood and dirt. Santana didn't feel clean, though. She felt dirty.  _Verguenza_. Shame. She felt like she wanted to throw up.

"Hey." Rachel lifted her chin up.

"I'm going to tuck you into my bed and then call your parents to let them know you're okay, all right?" When Santana's eyes widened a little, Rachel said, "It's okay. You can talk to them more about it when you're ready. I just don't want them calling the police when you don't come home." Santana nodded and again let Rachel lead her by the hand into her bedroom. She kicked off her pants and slid into Rachel's bed without another thought while Rachel picked up her cell phone and stepped out into the hallway. Santana listened as her eyes drooped from exhaustion.

"Mrs. Lopez? Yes, this is Rachel Berry again. Santana wasn't feeling well after she went to her  _abuela's_  so she's going to be staying the night here if that is acceptable. She hasn't spoken much since I picked her up, but I believe whatever was said was not pleasant. She knows you love her. I think she just wants a night to process it all in a non-family environment. Thank you for being so understanding. I promise I'll take good care of her. Thank you again. Good night."

Rachel crept back into the room and climbed into bed with Santana after brushing her teeth and getting into her pajamas. She kept herself away from Santana in case she did not want to be touched, but then Santana broke the silence. "She said I had shamed her. That secrets were secrets for a reason. That I should leave and never come back to her house again. I told  _mi_   _abuela_ that I'm gay and she threw me out." Then the Latina broke down. Rachel quickly wrapped her up in her arms and held her, rocking her back and forth as Santana sobbed her broken heart out in the darkness.

"Santana Marie Lopez, you are not worthless or shameful in any way. You are a beautiful person whose heart is bigger than most people know, and you are perfect just the way you are. If she can't see past her own bigotry and self-hate, then that is her loss. You're special, Tana. You're special and you are loved. You are precious to your family and friends, and…" Rachel paused and lifted Santana's head up, "you are precious to me."

With those whispered words and Rachel's fingers brushing tears off of Santana's cheeks, Rachel leaned in and kissed Santana.

* * *

Author's note: I know! I'm evil to end on that note, but I just thought it was a perfect moment. Yay Pezberry! I did indeed copy Santana's speech to her grandmother from the show, but Naya Rivera played that scene to absolute perfection, and it was brilliantly written for her character, so I decided not to change it (minus removing Brittany from it, obviously). I know this is a little angsty, but it is obviously very important to Santana's story. More actual Pezberry in the next chapter, and don't forget to please review!


	5. Did You Like It?

Disclaimer:  _Glee_  is the creation of Ryan Murphy. Who else but the creator of  _Nip/Tuck_  could create such a weird (and yet awesome) show? Yeesh, that show still gives me nightmares. Oh, well, on with the show (or story as ever the case may be)!

Author's note: This chapter is mostly Pezberry, but totally awesome and totally worth the not-quite-plot. A note about formatting: There's a song near the end of this chapter. For readability, here's what you need to know: All the lyrics are in quotes. The regular non-formatted lyrics are Santana. The _italicized_ lyrics are Rachel. The **bold** lyrics are any time the two of them sing together or with the group.

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Chapter 5: "Did You Like It?"

When Santana woke up, she was really warm. At first she thought that she must have fallen asleep without turning on her fan like she usually did. Then she realized that there was a weight around her that was definitely heavier than her blankets. As she started to move, she felt the warm breath on the back of her neck. Suddenly, all of yesterday came back to her. She couldn't stand to think much about her  _abuela_ , but the thought that kept running over and over through her head was  _Rachel kissed me. Rachel Berry kissed me! I kissed her back!_

Santana was slowly starting to freak out when Rachel mumbled out: "Dear God, Santana, your brain is  _really_  loud. It's too early for you to be thinking this much and that's coming from me! I get up at 6:00 a.m. every morning to work out and you are exhausting me already."

Santana tried to inch away from Rachel and quickly said, "I don't know what you're talking about, Berry, but I gots to get my things and head out of here, so stop cuddling up to me."

Rachel wrapped her arms tighter around Santana: "Don't even think about it. Just lie back down and we can talk about this, okay? This doesn't have to be something you freak out about."

At those words, Santana lunged forward, trying to escape from Rachel's bed before her heart got any more damaged than it already was. She couldn't handle this. Rachel was going to reject her, tell her the kiss was just out of pity and that she was straight and there was no way she would ever  _really_  flirt with Santana—

With a surprised yelp, Santana was thrown backward onto the bed and Rachel-freaking-Berry was straddling her! "What the fuck!  _Mierda_! Berry, wha—"

"Rachel. My name is Rachel. You seemed perfectly able to say it last night. In fact, you shortened it to Rach, which I actually quite liked."

"Rachel. Get the fuck—"

" _Cállate_!"

Santana had never been more shocked in her life. Not only had Rachel flipped her without much effort – her, a Cheerio – but now she was telling her to shut up in Spanish.

"You will lie here and be quiet for five minutes, Santana. You will give me time to explain what I mean, and you will not run out on me like you have run out on every other person you thought could even remotely hurt you." When it looked like Santana was not going to move, Rachel sat back a little and released Santana's hands, which she had been holding down above her head. She tried not to think about how much this position turned her on since she had never seen Santana in a position of submission.

"What I meant by this not being a big deal is that I understand you might not be ready for a relationship or anything past friendship with me. I was giving you an out in case you truly did regret our kiss last night. I could see instantly when I said that that you thought I was rejecting you. Nothing could be further from the truth, Santana. I love that we've become so close these past weeks, and I love that you are beginning to trust me. The fact is you called me last night because you knew I would be there for you no matter what and I love that. However, I would be lying if I told you that I didn't want more from you."

At Santana's quirked eyebrow, Rachel continued: "I kissed you last night to show you how much I care for you, and to let you know that you are not alone. I also wanted to show you that I am attracted to you. I know you've noticed my flirting the last couple of weeks – some of it was so blatant I think even Finn would have realized I was coming onto him – but the kiss was definitely my way of solidifying that my feelings are more than friendly in nature." When Santana scoffed, Rachel rolled her eyes and said, "Fine. I like you, Tana. I like you as more than friends. I want to take my hands and run them all over your body, then I want to—"

Blushing, Santana interrupted: "Ooookay! I get it, Rach. You like me."

"Did I make Santana Lima-Heights-Adjacent Lopez, HBIC of McKinley, blush?" Rachel laughed. While she was caught off guard with the giggles, Santana turned the tables on Rachel, literally, as she flipped Rachel over and topped her. Santana started tickling her, and it was all the shorter brunette could do to not fall off the bed with how much she was laughing.

The tickling turned into a wrestling match of sorts and it quickly became apparent that the girls were pretty evenly matched. Santana was a Cheerio and had a daily workout regimen, but then so did Rachel, who felt that it was her duty to stay in shape for her future Broadway prospects. Finally, Santana ended up back on top (she did have Sue as her coach) and both girls were breathing heavily. Santana looked down at Rachel and realized that this crazy yet beautiful girl had almost effortlessly distracted her from her troubles so totally and completely, and all she wanted to do was kiss her: so she did.

Rachel arched into Santana's mouth as the Latina pulled the singer up slightly from the bed, molding their bodies together. She wrapped her arms around Santana's neck and moaned into her mouth as Santana ran her tongue along the shorter girl's lips and coaxed her mouth open. This time it was definitely Santana who moaned as Rachel's tongue battled with hers and neither one of them cared who won. They were both victors in this game.

Santana's hands found their way onto Rachel's ass, and the diva gasped as the Latina gripped tightly and pulled her even closer. Then it was Santana's turn to lose her breath as Rachel latched onto her neck and started to suck on her pulse point. Santana couldn't handle it anymore. There were too many sensations. She pulled back and shifted her hands up, moving Rachel away from her neck.  _Fuck, she's really good at that_.

Sitting back a little, Rachel looked at Santana through eyes bloodshot with arousal. "Tana? You okay?"

"Yeah, I can't believe I'm the one saying this, but I think we gotta sit back and take a breath for a moment." Rachel seemed to be listening. However, after a minute of no response from the girl who normally wouldn't shut up, Santana realized that the only thing the other girl was focused on was the movement of her lips. Santana laughed and nudged her a little. "Rach, I know I'm hot shit, but you gotta focus on my actual words right now, beautiful."

Rachel shook her head and finally looked up into the taller girl's eyes. "Right, sorry, focusing now. Why should we stop again?"

"Well, your dads are downstairs and they could come up here any minute. Also, I'm all for mackin' on you hardcore, but I think full-on sex the day after our first kiss is not the best idea."

"Santana Lopez is the voice of reason with regard to sex? Who are you and what have you done with the girl who did body shots off Brittany at the Glee party we had in my basement last year?"

"I know, right?" Santana smirked and lifted Rachel up and off of her, then got up from the bed herself. As she leaned down to place another kiss on Rachel's lips, they heard Leroy shout up the stairs, "Hey, is anyone hungry for breakfast up there? We have bacon!"

Santana tried to scoot around Rachel to get downstairs as quickly as possible (Seriously, who wouldn't for bacon?), when the other girl grabbed her wrist and said, "Tana? What does this mean for us?" Santana turned back and rested her forehead against the singer's brow. "I wanna be with you, Rach. I can't say that I'll be any good at it since I've never really been anyone's girlfriend before, but you make me want to try my hardest to be the best goddamned girlfriend I can possibly be. I mean, let's face it, who else could get me to say all this romantic shit all the time but you?"

Rachel smiled in that special way that was all for Santana and pulled the Latina's head down to kiss her one more time. "I am pretty awesome. So are you, by the way. In fact, I think you're wonderful, and I would love to be your girlfriend, too. You don't have to worry too much about not having any experience in the area of dating, since you know my dating history is pretty horrendous as well. We'll just try to make our way through it together, okay?"

Nodding, Santana laced her fingers through Rachel's and leaned forward to whisper, "You know what we should do now?" Rachel leaned even closer to her, focusing on her lips and mumbled, "Hmmm?"

Santana kissed her on the nose, smacked her ass, and shouted, "Go get some bacon!" She bolted before Rachel could react and rushed down the stairs with the singer barreling down right after her. Rachel shouted at the top of her lungs, "Santana, get the  _hell_  back here! I am not eating bacon and I will get you back for that!"  _Damn, she had impressive breath control. No wonder she could sing and kiss the way she did._

Santana walked through the doors of McKinley later that morning feeling like nothing in the world could stop her. After having an awesome breakfast with the Berry men and her girlfriend (and, wow, that was weird to even think, but in a good way), she had rushed over to her house to change into fresh clothes for school. She'd been all for skipping the day entirely but Rachel had stated in no uncertain terms that her "almost perfect attendance record cannot be marred, especially not with the NYADA auditions coming up in a few months." She followed that up by saying, "Santana, if you meet me at school, I'll make it worth your while after school." This is why Santana was currently walking down the hall to her locker.  _Come on, she said it while nibbling on my fucking ear. What was I supposed to do?_

Smirking while thinking this, Santana opened her locker and grabbed her books. She smiled even wider when she caught a whiff of vanilla. She turned around just slightly and watched as Rachel walked by her, swaying her ass just a little more than normal. After their shared breakfast, the girls had decided that they wanted to keep their relationship between the two of them at least for the first week or so. It was really new and they wanted it to be something special that was just theirs for a little while. Santana made sure that Rachel knew that she was not ashamed of her, but they both acknowledged that once the whole school knew about them it would add a lot more pressure to their relationship. Right now, they just wanted to enjoy it. As Rachel sauntered down the hall and Santana tried not to openly stare, both girls were  _definitely_  enjoying it.

By the time Glee practice rolled around at the end of the day, both Santana and Rachel had gone from slow-burn mode to full-on horny as hell. The two girls had been trying to one-up each other all day by teasing one another. Rachel had pulled Santana under the bleachers for a hot and heavy make-out session after watching the Cheerio do the splits in mid-air during practice; while Santana had caught Rachel between classes for a tryst in the janitor's closest after the diva kept purposefully bending over and flashing more leg than should be legal at her during stretches in gym class.

All in all, it took all of Santana's energy not to just grab Rachel and skip Glee altogether, but they were both determined to win Nationals this year, and Santana did not need an hour-long earful about the horrible things that could happen if they did not practice their singing regularly. However, Santana smirked evilly when she realized that the performance she had been working on all week would be the perfect way to flirt shamelessly with her new girlfriend without the rest of the Glee club being aware. This was going to be awesome (and really well-timed).

Mr. Schue walked in and clapped his hands to get everyone's attention. "All right, so I hear that Santana, Rachel, and all the girls have been working on a piece this week. You guys want to take the floor?"

Santana got up and pulled Rachel with her. "So, I met with  _mi abuela_  last night and…well, it didn't end up going like I wish it had. You know though, I have a supportive family and amazing friends who are there for me especially right now. Those friends have also gone along with my crazy plan to do this song, so please enjoy."

The music started and Santana started to sing, knowing full-well that Rachel would be there to back her up (no pun intended).

"This was never the way I planned"

" _Not my intention"_

"I got so brave, drink in hand"

" _Lost my discretion"_

Rachel couldn't help but remember pulling Santana in for a kiss last night as well as the definite indiscretion of making out under the bleachers (but have you seen how far Santana can spread her legs when doing the splits?).

"It's not what"

" _I'm used to"_

"Just wanna try you on"

_And on and on_. They both had similar thoughts as they danced with one another: their hips almost touching and their breath comingling.

" _I'm curious for you"_

" **Caught my attention!"**

" **I kissed a girl and I liked it"**

"The taste of her cherry Chapstick"

When this lyric hit, Santana flashed back to this morning as she remembered the feel of Rachel in her lap, the vanilla scent of her hair, and the cherry Chapstick that she really  _did_  wear. She almost moaned at the memory. It didn't help that Rachel was running her hands down Santana's torso (playing up to the audience) while they continued to sing.

" **I kissed a girl just to try it"**

" _ **I hope my boyfriend don't mind it"**_

_Please, Finnocence couldn't handle the hotness that is my girlfriend._

" **It felt so wrong, it felt so right, don't mean I'm in love tonight**

**I kissed a girl and I liked it, I liked it"**

" **Us girls, we are so magical**

**Soft skin, red lips, so kissable**

**Hard to resist, so touchable**

**Too good to deny it**

**Ain't no big deal, it's innocent"**

They both loved the song, but as the two girls locked eyes across the room, they knew it was much more than "innocent".

" **I kissed a girl and I liked it**

**The taste of her cherry Chapstick**

**I kissed a girl just to try it**

**I hope my boyfriend don't mind it**

**It felt so wrong**

**It felt so right**

**Don't mean I'm in love tonight"**

Well, maybe not in love quite yet because Santana didn't even know what that really meant. Nevertheless, as she slid her arms around Rachel's waist, she thought she might be learning faster than she even realized.

" **I kissed a girl and I liked it  
I liked it"**

At the end of the song, all the boys were drooling and all the girls were laughing and hugging. Mr. Schue was on his feet clapping furiously and all Santana and Rachel wanted to do was leave right then, go back to one of their houses, lock the door, and shut out the world. However, the world invaded in the form of Puck, who had gotten up to hug Santana. As he pulled back, he said, "Yo, San, you get that hickey from the girl you kissed? Did you like it?"

* * *

Additional author's note: This is the first song I have added from the show, obviously, and I'm still working out how to intersperse the thoughts with the words, so my apologies if it looks a little stilted. Let me know what you think!


	6. This Moment

Disclaimer:  _Glee_  is not mine. Period. Now on with the show!

Author's note: In regards to the Troubletones: they are still going to battle against New Directions at Sectionals, but if you'll remember when Santana was coming out fully she sang with the Glee club, which is why she practiced and sang  _I Kissed A Girl_  with them in the last chapter. We have officially moved into the realm where the rating is going to become pretty obvious, so hold onto your hats everyone!

* * *

Chapter 6: "This Moment"

Santana froze for all of two seconds after Puck mentioned her hickey, but she quickly recovered. "Like I'd tell you, Puck. You'd just get turned on by anything I say, and that's disgusting, so forget it." No one seemed to notice her awkward pause, except for Quinn. The blonde's eyebrow rose as she noticed the tenseness that had suddenly appeared and then disappeared from Santana's shoulders. She'd known Santana her entire life, and something was definitely up.

At Puck's comment, Brittany perked up and said, "San, are you seeing someone? That's awesome! Maybe you guys can go on a double date with me and Artie and we could all feed the ducks!" This definitely made everyone stare at Santana, since most of them had just assumed that it was Brittany who had left the hickey on Santana's neck. Artie was his normal oblivious self, and they knew Brittany loved him, but theirs was an interesting friendship so it was not out of the realm. However, this new development made everyone extremely interested in figuring out who Santana was getting hickeys from.

"Oh, come one, San, you've gotta tell Puckasaurus! If you're getting it on with another girl, I wanna know all the details! Is it someone here at McKinley?"

"First, seriously Puck, it's none of your fucking business. Second, you can all stop trying to figure it out right now, because it's definitely not  _anyone's_  business."

"I actually agree with Santana on this. We should all go back to practicing for Sectionals. They are in two weeks after all." Rachel tried to steer the conversation away from the hickey on Santana's neck (which now that she was looking at it more closely, how had she not realized she was sucking that hard?). Noticing Puck's dazed look, she snapped, "Puck, get your mind out of the gutter and stop using Santana for your own personal fantasies." The girls who were sitting closest to him all hit him on any body part that they could reach easily since they could see that that was definitely what he was doing, which was just gross.

Mr. Schue cleared his throat and they continued with Glee practice, but Quinn was still intensely curious about who could have possibly broken through the walls that everyone could see Santana had put around her heart since Brittany had turned her down last year. Looking around at her fellow Glee teammates, Quinn quickly realized that she wasn't the only one who was determined to find out who Santana was seeing. She needed to appease her desire for fresh gossip, which had been ingrained in her since the first day she had become the most popular girl at McKinley High. You had to love gossip – and know how best to use it – to remain on top in high school.

Once Glee was over for the day, Santana and Rachel left separately so as not to attract attention, but as Rachel walked down the hallway, Santana grabbed her and pulled her into an empty classroom, locking the door behind them. Rachel laughed and whispered, "We really need to stop meeting like this, Santana." The taller girl simply pulled Rachel in for a deep kiss. When they came up for air, Santana said, "You couldn't have warned me that the cover-up had come off at some point, Rach?"

"Well, I was a little busy kissing you at any chance I could get to really notice it. I'm pretty sure it was still working until the song, but my arm must have rubbed most of it off while we were dancing. Sorry." Rachel did not look at all repentant. In fact, she looked downright smug. "You're proud of yourself, aren't you?" Santana asked.

"Well, let's face it, someone has to be pretty hot to leave a hickey on Santana Lopez's neck and have her not yell at them." Santana smirked and pulled Rachel fully into her body, wrapping her arms around her waist and trying to grab the smaller diva's ass. Trapping Santana's hands in her own before they could reach their goal, Rachel laughed and shook her head at Santana's antics. She was successfully distracted from her original plan by how utterly kissable Rachel's lips looked. Santana claimed another kiss from the other girl, before saying, "The answer to your question is yes.  _S_ _uficientemente caliente_  to be with you _._ "

"You know, that would have been really sweet if you hadn't insisted on grabbing my ass while saying it, Santana." Santana threw her head back and laughed, and Rachel just shook her head in resignation. Then she did something that completely floored the Latina: she grabbed one of the hands on her ass and slowly slid Santana's index finger into her mouth, sucking on it until Santana's knees just about gave out and she was breathing really heavily. Rachel watched in satisfaction as the taller girl swallowed hard. "It really is fun to surprise you. Speaking of surprises, we should really try to be more careful if we want to have any hope of keeping our relationship to ourselves."

Santana shook her head to snap out of her horny haze. "Yeah, well, Puck may be a problem. The entire club is nosey, but as my bro he might make it his business to get to the bottom of the mystery – if only so he can have a clear image for his jack-off fantasies." Rachel agreed and then added, "Quinn also looked pretty curious, so we might run into issues with her as well."

"Well, that just means we'll have even more fun trying to sneak around." Santana got a serious look in her eyes, "You don't mind, do you? 'Cause if you want, I'll tell the whole world right now."

Rachel smiled and shook her head, cupping Santana's cheek in her hand, "No, I like the intrigue. I do want to tell them soon, but I would love to keep this all to ourselves for now. Maybe we can tell them after Sectionals? I know we are battling against each other in the Troubletones and New Directions respectively; I don't want them to think that we're trying to sabotage each other."

Santana snorted and rolled her eyes, "You mean you don't want Finncompentent to think that I am trying to destroy your chances at winning by getting into your panties." Rachel sighed resignedly and said, "Unfortunately, yes, that is what I mean. You know how he can get, Tana. Are you okay with that?" Santana kissed the tip of Rachel's nose and smiled, pulling her close once more. "It's fine, Rach. I know that we're doing this for ourselves and the teams, not for him." She grabbed Rachel's hand and pulled her towards the door.

"Now, we should get the hell out of this classroom and head home. I've spent way too much time in this school today. Come on, beautiful." Rachel smiled at Santana once again using that term of endearment without realizing it, and both girls left the classroom, one after the other in the hopes that no one would see them. However, they failed to see Brittany, who had gotten lost leaving the choir room and had just now found her way back to the hallway. She watched both girls leave through the front doors and smiled. Santana and Rachel were perfect for each other, and she couldn't be happier. Brittany whistled as she left the school a minute or two behind them. She needed to go tell Lord Tubbington the news!

* * *

The next week was insane. Despite their promise to have fun with the intrigue, by the end of the week Santana was ready to cut a bitch and Rachel would have voluntarily given up a solo to get Puck to stop following her around. Apparently, the Glee kids (both New Directions and the Troubletones) had met with one another and all agreed that Rachel and Santana had become quite close so they should try and see if the diva knew who Santana was dating. Kurt and Blaine exchanged a look at this, and Brittany just smiled. Mercedes tried to get Kurt to ask Rachel, but the boy absolutely refused citing his own new friendship with her. He didn't want to get smacked for sticking his nose where it didn't belong. Additionally, he had his own theory about the two girls, one he was definitely not sharing with the whole group. Puck was therefore offered up as someone who could to talk to Rachel since they had their "Jew Connection."

Brittany told them that Lord Tubbington wanted her to stop gossiping so she couldn't ask Santana. In the end, Quinn and Mercedes were chosen, since Quinn had been Santana's friend for years (even though their friendship had been a little rocky for the last little while) and Mercedes was her co-leader for the Troubletones. Finn wanted to see if he could get Rachel to tell him, but that idea was quickly shot down. Rachel really did not like Finn anymore, despite his delusions to the contrary, and they all knew he would not get anything out of her.

It began with Puck popping up whenever Rachel had a free moment, which meant she and Santana didn't have any time to get away together. She'd be just about to run off to the bathroom or the janitor's closet and there he would be: "Hello, my Jewish American Princess. How are you this fine day?"

"I'm not telling you anything, Noah. I don't know who Santana is dating, and even if I did I wouldn't tell you. Go away, please." Puck would then proceed to follow her down the hall until she got to her next class.

Santana was not having any better luck. All throughout Troubletones rehearsals she would get looks from Mercedes, and then she would stalk her to her next class. Meanwhile, Quinn would stare at her during Cheerios practice and then hassle her in the locker room. "Seriously, Q, back the fuck off before I kick your ass again. Just because we've been getting along lately doesn't mean I won't hit you."

"Come on, Santana. It can't be that big a secret. We're just curious: who're you dating?"

"I'm not dating anyone, and I refuse to have this convo anymore. Stop harassing me!"

By the end of the week, both girls were ready to just lock themselves away from all of it. The weekend was an unseasonably warm 60 degrees in early December, so they decided to spend all of it in the heated backyard pool that Santana had (so she lived in a nicer part of town then she let on, so sue her). This is why they were sprawled out on lawn chairs in their bathing suits on Sunday afternoon. Santana's parents were gone for the day and her brother had gone back to school until Christmas break, so they were enjoying their alone time. That is until the front door bell rang. "Ugh, who could that be? I'll be right back, Rach."

Santana walked through the house in her two-piece bathing suit (and damn, it was fun to watch Rachel drool over her in it). She shouted as the door bell rang again, "All right, already! Chill!" She opened the door and almost swore at the sight before her eyes. Fucking Puck! "What do you want, douche?"

"Hey, now, I thought it might be nice to hang out with my best female bro!"

"I thought Rachel was your 'best female bro,' seeing as you have been bugging her all week to find out if I'm seeing anyone."

Puck looked uncomfortable for a minute, and then said, "Fine, I brought beer. Is that enough of a peace offering?"

Santana shook her head and went to close the door, "No. I'm busy, Puck. Thanks for the offer, but I'll see you tomorrow at school. We'll hang another time." With that, she slammed the door in his face before he could even have time to respond. He stood there for a minute or two and then walked back to his car. When he got in, he called Quinn and said "Call everyone. There's definitely something going on. She was in her swimsuit, but she said she was busy and slammed the door right in my face. No, you don't understand: she turned down free beer!" All Puck heard was Quinn dropping the phone on the other end in shock. Now they knew this was serious.

All through the next week, both clubs were really too busy preparing for Sectionals to focus on the mystery of who had given Santana that hickey. They all still watched her, but nothing really seemed to be out of the ordinary. She went to practice (both Cheerios and Glee) and classes, and if she was hard to find after school, they all just assumed she was holed up in her room. She and Rachel were friends, but that had been true for weeks now, so there was nothing really out of the ordinary with that. Kurt and Puck still saw Santana and Rachel at the coffee shop once or twice that week but they were all distracted, so if they did notice longer looks or more skin-on-skin contact between the two girls, they decided not to comment on it. Through it all, the girls were still blissfully happy with one another, and they tried to steal any moment they could with one another, despite how busy they were. Brittany just watched it all with a smile on her face.

Finally, Sectionals arrived. The competition was being hosted at McKinley so the Troubletones were changing in the girls' bathroom, the New Directions girls in the choir room, and the New Directions guys in the mens' bathroom. Rachel hadn't seen Santana all day, so when she got a text from her to meet in the Cheerios' locker room, she rushed out to meet her. "Tana? You in here?" Rachel felt familiar arms wrap around her waist and the small brunette smiled, all the while holding those arms closer to her. "Hey, baby, where have you been all day?"

Santana kissed the back of Rachel's neck and said, "Practicing. I wanted to grab you before we go out there." She turned Rachel around and tilted her chin up. "This is me wishing you luck and telling you that no matter what happens out there today – you and me, we're still solid." Rachel wrapped her arms around her girlfriend's neck as she usually ended up doing because of their height difference and said, "I would be lying if I said that I didn't want this, and you know that's the truth. However, I have never been so okay with the idea of possibly not winning as I am right now. I know that we are both going to rock this, and I am ecstatic that no matter what I will have you at the end of this day." They kissed and as Rachel started to make her way out of the locker room, she shot behind her: "But we're totally going to kick your ass."

She was gone before Santana could form a coherent response, but Rachel could hear her loud laughter echoing down the hall behind her.  _Fuck, why is her confidence such a turn-on?_

Both performances went amazingly. The Troubletones blew those ridiculous Unitards out of the water with their mash-up of  _Survivor/I Will Survive_ , but Santana had to admit that New Directions really killed with the Jackson medley. Which was why, when New Directions was announced as the winner, Santana only felt a slight pang of disappointment. They had been beat, and at least she would probably get some really great victory kisses out of Rachel from all of this. She was even happier with the results when Mr. Schue announced that anyone from the Troubletones who wanted to could join back with New Directions for Regionals and beyond. After an intense discussion (and an agreement that the Troubletones could have at least one number in each competition with any other girls who wanted to join in), they all agreed.

Santana couldn't help but smile as Rachel bum-rushed her and shoved her against a bathroom stall door (after they both checked to make sure no one was in the bathroom with them). She tangled her fingers in Rachel's hair and moaned as the shorter girl bit down on her lower lip. "If this is the reaction I get when you win, I need to make sure you win competitions more often, Rach." Rachel answered by sliding her hands around Santana's waist and used her own body to pin the taller girl to the stall. She pulled back a little and said, "Well, victory definitely makes me horny. However, while I admit it was a bit of a turn-on to see you dancing with Brittany, I would appreciate a warning next time."

Santana leaned back a little, startled. "Are you jealous?"

"Don't get too smug, missy. I was only a little jealous, and only because I really wanted to be the one dancing with you in front of everyone like that."

Santana smiled and said, "Well, how about this: Let's go out to that auditorium and dance together with our friends as we all sing a toast to New Directions' victory. No one will look twice at us, and we can have all the fun we want to."

Rachel smiled and followed Santana out of the bathroom. As she grabbed Santana's hand and pulled her onto the stage to dance to  _We Are Young_ , she had never been happier. She had the girl and they were all headed to Regionals. Nothing could be better than this moment.


	7. Might Be Ready For

Disclaimer: Not mine, not mine, not mine, not mine!

Author's note: Once more unto the breach, dear friends! Sorry, I just had to get that off my chest. Anyway, I meant to add at the end of the last chapter that there will be a little more angst going into this, but I'm definitely embracing the warm and fuzzy moments for now.

* * *

Chapter 7: "Might Be Ready For"

Christmas was fast approaching and Santana and Rachel had never been happier. At school they still had to be careful about being seen together, but on the weekends they were able to mostly be themselves. They had yet to tell their parents about one another, though they did often spend meals at one another's homes. However, the allure of having to be covert at home was starting to wear thin, which is why Rachel finally brought it up.

They were lying on the couch together at Rachel's house. Her dads were out and Santana was lying across Rachel's lap while they watched Rent.  _So I like_ Rent _, so what? It's got a pretty kick-ass, slightly dark storyline, okay? Sheesh, get off my fucking back about it._  Rachel leaned down to kiss Santana's lips, breaking her from her reverie. She looked down at the girl lying across her lap said, "Tana? You think we could tell our parents about us?" That definitely got the slightly sleeping Latina's attention.

"You want to tell people?"

"Not 'people,' but it would be nice if we could be ourselves around our families at least. I don't mind sneaking around at school, especially since the Glee club is so nosy. However, it does get frustrating having to sit across from you on the couch and not be able to hold your hand while we watch TV with my parents or have dinner with yours. Do you not want them to know?" Rachel got a little furrow of slight distress in her forehead.

Santana smoothed the crinkle away with her fingers as she sat up and faced Rachel. "Rach, no, I really do want to tell them. You know I told you I would tell the world right now if we both wanted to. I just want to make sure we are both prepared, okay? My brother will give us no end of shit, and your dads will never let us go into your room and close the door again. Also, I'm pretty sure sleepovers would be out. Rachel smiled slightly and sighed. "I know, but I think the benefits will outweigh what we'll lose. We don't have to tell them yet if you're not ready."

"I am ready, beautiful. I just wanted to make sure we were both on the same page. We'll tell each of our parents tonight. Do you want to do it separately or together?"

"While I would love to have you with me, I fear my fathers might get a little out of hand if they think you've been 'defiling' their little girl."

Santana smirked and flitted her eyebrows up and down suggestively. "Defiling, huh? When do we get to that part? Are there handcuffs involved?  _Me gusta!_ "

Rachel laughed and dodged out of the way of Santana's reaching hands. "Oh, no, you don't, Santana! I know you too well,  _querida_. You keep those wandering hands to yourself!" Then she leaned forward and whispered in Santana's ear, "Or I really  _will_  have to get out those handcuffs in my nightstand,  _chica sucia_."

Santana choked, "And you say  _I'm_ the "dirty girl?" Rachel just laughed and dodged out of the way again as Santana lunged for her. "Well, they do say it takes one to know one. I guess you could say I'm the pot, you're the kettle, and I'm calling you black." With that, she raced up the stairs with Santana in pursuit. When the taller girl caught her, Santana threw her down on the bed and started to suck on her neck. She pulled Rachel's hands above her head and held them there, then slid her thigh in between the shorter brunette's legs. As Santana slid her tongue down Rachel's neck, the latter girl moaned and arched into her, inadvertently thrusting her center into the thigh wedged between her legs. Rachel moaned louder, and pulled Santana up by her hair into a deep, bruising kiss.

When Santana was sure that Rachel would pull back and tell them to stop, the diva instead pulled back to rip off Santana's top and throw it across the room. She rolled them over and gazed down at her prize. "Definitely a  _chica sucia_ , but you're  _my_   _chica sucia_." She leaned down and began to suck on Santana's collarbone, one of the other girl's weaknesses that she had discovered early on in their relationship. Santana moaned and could care less that she sounded like a bitch in heat.  _Rachel Berry is fucking hot, and she is making me feel all kinds of amazing right now._

Santana slid her hands up Rachel's sides and slowly took her shirt with her, pulling her away just enough to get it over her head. What she saw was one of the most erotic sights she had ever seen (and she'd had sex with Brittany, who was rumored not to wear panties under her Cheerios spankies. Rumor confirmed.) Rachel was wearing a black bra, and it was not at all the type that Quinn and the other Cherrios would have guessed when they first started calling Rachel "Man-hands." This was a supportive, practical bra (Santana would have expected nothing less), but it had lace covering the front and made the Latina think of dark dance floors and sweaty sheets. Fuck, Rachel was killing her!

Rachel could not keep her eyes, or lips, off of Santana's breasts either. Her decently enhanced C-cups were encased in a red bra that was equally lacy. While she had expected nothing less from the hottest girl in school, she was still very appreciative. Rachel was currently showing this appreciation by leaving the worst (read: best) hickey on the swell of Santana's right breast. Santana moaned and arched into Rachel's lips while she gripped the back of the diva's head and cried out, "Fuck, Rach, don't stop.  _Jesucristo!_ _Chúpame_ _más_ _, por favor!"_

Rachel looked up with lust-filled eyes and whispered, " _Si_ , of course,  _querida_. I'll suck as hard as you want." At those words, Santana thrust her thigh up forcefully yet sensually. Rachel moaned louder than anything either of them had heard before. Her body shook and trembled for a minute or so, and she squeezed her eyes shut tightly as she gripped Santana's upper arms. Rachel slumped forward a little and Santana had to support her. Carefully sliding the smaller girl to the side to lay down on the bed next to her, Santana propped herself up on her arm and whispered, "You okay, beautiful?"

Rachel slowly opened her eyes and said, "Yeah, I'm…really great." She looked very dazed.

Santana laughed. "I finally found a sure fire way of getting you to keep your sentences small."

Rachel rolled her eyes and turned on her side to face Santana. "I'm a little embarrassed. I didn't mean for that to happen – at least not so quickly and unexpectedly."

"Hey, you've got nothing to be embarrassed about, Rachel. The best orgasms are that way, and trust me when I say I wouldn't have been much farther behind you. It was amazing, and you are so gorgeous I couldn't take my eyes off you, then or now." Santana sealed the sentiment with a slow, gentle kiss.

Rachel asked, "Are you okay? Do you want me to try to…?"

Santana shrugged and said, "Honestly? I'm okay right now. A little worked up…" At Rachel's sidelong glance, she corrected, "Okay, a lot worked up, but I always feel like that after we make out. I know you're still not 100% comfortable with the whole sex and orgasms thing. So we'll leave it where we are for now, okay? I can wait." Rachel looked skeptical. "Hey, I'm not that much of a sex addict! Besides, I totes hear your dad's car in the driveway, and I  _really_ don't think we want them finding out about us like this."

Rachel squeaked and tried to get up quickly yet gracefully to get dressed. Nevertheless, she promptly fell off the bed. Santana couldn't stop laughing, even while Rachel threw Santana her shirt and tried to scramble into her own.

* * *

All Santana could think as she sat awkwardly waiting in her own living room was that they should have expected this. When she finally told her parents about the wonderful girl she was dating, they would of course ask for her name. She really shouldn't have been surprised that they immediately asked if Rachel's parents knew, and even less surprised when they told her to invite her girlfriend and her fathers over for Christmas dinner. When Santana pointed out that they were Jewish, her father said, "Nonsense,  _mija_ , Hiram works with me at the hospital, and I know that he mentioned that they try to celebrate both Christmas and Chanukah since Leroy was raised Christian. I'm sure they would love the invite!"

When Santana called to invite them, Leroy agreed that Christmas dinner would be lovely. Santana could definitely hear Hiram shouting in the background, "We may like her as a person. But if she hurts our little girl in any way, they'll never find the body!" She could also hear Rachel yelling, "Daddy!" at him in the background. All of this was why Santana was nervously waiting for the doorbell to ring in her own house. She really didn't want to end up on the side of the road in some ditch somewhere courtesy of Hiram Berry. When the doorbell did finally ring, she jumped so far off the couch that her older brother burst out laughing. She smacked him for it on her way to answer the door, and he yelled, "Hey, no hitting!"

" _Mija_ , don't hit your brother. Antonio, don't bait your sister."

"He started it!"

"I don't care who started it. Now don't be rude, Santana. Go answer the door, please."

With a huff, Santana made her way to the door filled with equal portions of excitement and dread. Excited to see her girlfriend, but also terrified of seeing the Berry men now that they knew their daughter was her girlfriend. She pasted a smile on her face and was immediately swept up in a great big, vanilla-scented hug by her overly enthusiastic (no surprise there) girlfriend. "Merry Christmas and Happy Chanukah, Tana!" She smiled and looked nervously at Rachel's fathers who were standing behind her. "Don't look so terrified, Santana," said Leroy. "We know you really care for our daughter, and we are happy for you both." Hiram nodded agreement. "Unless you hurt her. Then we'd have to hurt you, which is not an idle threat since you know I'm a surgeon. I could make it look like an accident." At Santana's horrified look, he burst out laughing and her own father joined in.

"Ah, Hiram, I do love your sense of humor. It takes a lot to shock my Santana, so thank you for that! Please, come in gentlemen. We'll take your coats, and we can all sit down for a nice meal."

After some shuffling around the table, with Santana and Tony pushing each other every once in awhile, they all sat down. Her parents were sitting on opposite ends of the table, with Tony next to her mom and Santana next to him, and Rachel on her other side with Hiram and Leroy on the other side of the table. The meal was going relatively well and everyone was really getting along. Leroy asked, "So, Santana, what are your plans for after high school?"

"Dad!"

"No, it's cool, Rach. To be honest, I hadn't really thought about it too much until this year. I'm a Cheerio, so I always kinda thought that I would be going to college on a cheerleading scholarship."

"You're not dumb, Tana."

"No, Rach, I'm not. However, I do know what my strengths are. I am a really great cheerleader and gymnast, and I've never been afraid to use that."

Leroy paused in contemplation and then asked, "Have you considered going to college for music?"

Santana looked at him curiously and her parents perked up at this. "What do you mean?"

"Well, you have a beautiful voice, Santana. While you may not feel like Broadway is for you, you could probably do very well at Julliard for vocals and maybe pursue a career as a singer?" Leroy said encouragingly.

Rachel nodded as well. Her mom spoke up and said, "Santana, we have noticed how much you love performing and how good you are at it. It wouldn't hurt to think about."

"With Glee you would even have a chance at a scholarship if you auditioned, Tana."

Santana shook her head, "I don't know. I really don't think I could measure up to the others who would be going out for it. I mean, I'm hot shit, and I definitely gots it goin' on, but so do all the other students who apply to a place like Julliard."

Tony snorted and said, "Plus, you'd have to be committed to something for more than a month. That's really not your strong suit, sis."

Santana froze and everyone at the table got really quiet. "What is that supposed to mean?"

"I mean, come on, San. I love you, but you're not that into long-term things. You were on and off with Puck for years, then your friendship with Quinn fizzled, and I haven't see Brittany in –"

"Don't bring up things you know nothing about, Tony."

Everyone's shocked eyes were focused on Santana who was staring straight at Rachel. It was the diva who had addressed Tony, right around when Santana would have thrown herself across the table to beat the shit out of her brother. No one had ever stuck up for her like that before. Now everyone seemed to be waiting to see what would happen next, even their parents.

"Hey, I was just joking around."

"You don't know what Santana has gone through with any of those people. You don't know how she's had to defend herself at school against them, and sometimes even defend them despite their lack of support for her. I get that it was a joke, but those people are part of your sister's life, and if she didn't tell you about what happened to any of those relationships and friendships, then it really isn't your place to comment on them."

When Tony seemed frozen in shock, Santana took steps to break the ice – despite her continued feelings of hurt at the mention of her failed friendship and relationship with Brittany. "How about the stupid name of that group we challenged at Sectionals, huh? The Unitards? I mean, come on!"

With that, everyone burst out laughing, and the conversation switched over to their chances at Regionals. They debated the odds now that New Directions was back together again and spoke of how college was going for Tony. The rest of the dinner went well overall. As Santana walked Rachel to the car behind her dads, the Latina grasped her hand and pulled her to a stop. "Thanks. You know, for defending my 'honor' or whatever." She was really horrible at saying thank you. Rachel knew what she meant though, and she leaned up and kissed her on the cheek. "You're welcome, love." They both froze as that word slipped out of Rachel's mouth.

Rachel looked like a deer in the headlights, and Santana figured she probably didn't look much better. Santana's heart started to hurt and she had a little trouble breathing.  _Why is it so fucking hot out here? There's snow on the ground for fuck's sake!_  "I…I mean, you know, I had a lovely night and I care for you, and I really like being your girlfriend. I didn't mean-"

"No, I get it. Yeah…you know, me too. Lovely night."

Rachel was definitely starting to look even more freaked out and Santana couldn't blame her.  _When the hell do I ever say "lovely night?" Fuck, I don't even know what to say to her!_  Rachel just nodded slowly and took a deep breath. "Okay, let's start over. I had a great time, Santana. Thank you for having us over, and you are most welcome for anything you think you might need to thank me for. I will see you when school begins once more on Monday." Santana had never heard Rachel so stiff and formal, and she knew it was because the shorter girl was really nervous. It made her smile a little. Santana decided to let that slip of a word which  _definitely_  made her uncomfortable just pass on by, for now. She kissed the tip of Rachel's nose followed by a peck on her lips since her dads were right nearby waiting in the car. "You are most welcome," she teased. "Now go get in the car before your dads really do decide to kill me. I'll see ya Monday, 'kay?."

Rachel nodded, reassured, though they both knew that they would feel weird about this moment for at least a little while. As Rachel slid into the car and Santana turned to watch them drive away, she couldn't help feeling like the blissful introductory state of their new relationship was about to be shaken up more than they might be ready for.

* * *

Additional note: There you go! Sexy times (of a kind), family times, and a little bit of tension! Let me know how you all feel it's going. I have about 20 chapters total I think I want for this story and a basic outline, but these things always seem to evolve as I write them (16 of the chapters are done so far, and they are all going to be posted today, as well as another stand-alone I have from Teen Wolf). Please review!


	8. I Love You

Disclaimer: I still neither own nor make any money off of  _Glee_. I just do this for fun!

Author's note: I really hope you all enjoy this and remember that I love both of these characters. I just needed to mix things up a bit. Review!

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Chapter 8: "I Love You"

When Mr. Schue told the Glee club that he was going to be proposing to Ms. Pillsbury and that he needed ideas for a song to have the club sing to her, Santana wanted to roll her eyes. So she did. This was immediately followed by Rachel smacking her arm lightly without even looking over from the next seat in the choir room.

"Ow! That hurt! What was that for?"

"Please, I barely grazed you, and we both know that you were rolling your eyes, Santana. I could feel it, and I'm sure even Puck could feel it from where he's sitting all the way at the end of the row." Santana turned to glare at Puck, but he was nodding his head in agreement obviously having overheard Rachel ragging on her.  _Ugh, I even find it slightly cute when she makes fun of me. I need to get my bad-assery back. Maybe call Finnoucuous some more ridiculous names? Yeah, that always cheers me right up. Shit, he even has a stupid-ass dumb jock look on his face right now. Wait, is he staring at my girl?_ Santana sat up straighter in her chair and glared daggers at Finnerd, because he was  _definitely_  staring at Rachel with that "I can't believe how in love with you I am" look.

"Yo, Mr. Schue. I'm all for helping you out with this, but maybe we should see if Finnane needs to go to the nurse's office. I think he's starting to develop an eye problem that will get seriously worse if he does not stop staring at girls who have no interest in him." Rachel glanced over at Santana as did the rest of the club, but Santana just shrugged it off and said, "Seriously? We don't need to see him fantasizing in the middle of Glee practice. That shit should be reserved for his fucking bedroom or something—and ewww, now I've got  _that_  hideous image stuck in my head.  _No me gusta._ "

Mr. Schue shook his head and said, "While I don't agree with your language, Santana – and I've asked you not to swear during Glee practice – Finn, I do have to agree. You don't seem to be paying attention to rehearsal, and it appears as though you are starting to make students other than just Santana uncomfortable." Mr. Schue gestured towards the row of girls around Rachel, and they all appeared to be trying to shuffle out of the way of Finn's direct line of sight. Finn glanced away and shrugged his shoulders trying to not look like he was still staring at Rachel. Santana spent the rest of Glee glaring right back at him until Finn practically bolted from the choir room at the end of practice.

"Well, that was interesting." Rachel said as she and Santana walked to the latter girl's car to drive back to the Latina's house (if anyone asked, they were going to study for their Spanish test at the end of the week. Since Mr. Schue was a horrible Spanish teacher, this wasn't hard to believe).

"What?"

"You spent the entire practice trying to stab Finn with your eyes, Tana. Do you want to tell me what's going on?" Rachel reached for Santana's hand, but the other girl shook her off. "Nothing, I just don't like how Finnerkel is always staring at you and undressing you with his eyes. As someone who has actually been undressed in front of him, let me tell you, it is not a pleasant experience."

Rachel shook her head. "First of all, I agree, and I am glad that you spoke up and that Mr. Schue came to my defense for once. However, seeing as you just mentioned one of the reasons that Finn will never be with me, since he lied to me about that among other things, I don't see why you need to get so defensive."

"I don't get defensive!"

Rachel just looked at Santana until the Latina chuckled and finally agreed, "Fine. You're right. I do get defensive, and I did get that way today. He just needs to learn to keep his eyes and his mind to himself, and he's still on my shit list for outing me to the entire fucking town."

"Write this moment down, ladies and gentlemen! Santana Lopez admitted that Rachel Berry was right and she was wrong!" Rachel then grabbed Santana's hand and danced a little crazy jig of some sort around the parking lot. Santana couldn't resist her silliness (even if she did roll her eyes at least once) and she joined in, laughing loudly at Rachel's antics. Neither girl saw Becky watching them from the school; though if they had, they would have known that Sue was going to know that there was something between them within the next few moments.

* * *

The next week was pretty uneventful. The Glee kids spent the time coming up with songs that they thought would be perfect for Mr. Schue's proposal. Ultimately (and unsurprisingly, to them), Santana and Rachel came up with the song that Mr. Schue chose, and he chose them to sing the lead vocals on it. Even Santana had to admit that none of them had seen anything more beautiful than the proposal right after they finished singing "We Found Love." If it was a little hard for her to get through the song with the tears in her eyes, only Rachel would ever know since she was singing with her.

Riding high off of the end to a pretty awesome day, Santana walked into the Cheerios locker room with a smile on her face and humming the lyrics that were still running through her head –  _and yeah, my heart. So I'm a bit of a sap. Que? I blame Rach._

It was with those lyrics in mind that she literally ran into another Cheerio just inside the door. "Whoa, watch out! Brittany?"

Brittany was crying – not just small tears, like the time she found out the Beatles weren't actually a band of singing bugs – huge, body shaking tears. The kind of tears that Santana had to hold the blonde through when they saw Lord Tubbington eat a baby bird. Santana automatically grabbed her oldest friend (and first love) and held her close without even a word needing to be said (for now).

When the crying slowed down enough, Santana asked, "Britt-britt? What happened?"

"I broke up with Artie."

Santana froze. "Why?"

"He called me stupid."

"WHAT? I'll kill that rolling  _saco de mierda_!"

"No, San, don't do anything stupid. He's not worth it. If you hit him, you'll get thrown out of school for sure, and we can't lose more unicorns like you!"

Santana tried to take deep breaths. "Okay, tell me what happened so I can make it better, okay?"

"We were talking about what happened today in Glee. When I brought up how nice it was that you defended Rachel, Artie said that you were just doing it so you could make fun of Finn. I told him that wasn't true because you really like Rachel. Then he said, 'Don't be naïve, Santana only ever does things for herself.' I said that he was being rude, and that I knew the word he just called me was another word for stupid. You taught me that. I also told him that I wasn't as stupid as he thought since I knew he'd been checking out Sugar every day during Glee."

Santana growled and tried to get up to go beat the shit out of Wheels, but Brittany held her back. "It's really okay, San. I told him he could go on staring all he wanted, because I deserved to be with someone who doesn't call me names and look at other bees in the hive if they're supposed to be my bee." At Santana's quizzical look, Brittany explained, "You know, that phrase people always say. There are many other bees in the hive?"

"Right, of course. A lot of fish in the sea, too."

"Well, duh, silly. It's the ocean, that's where they all live."

Santana smiled fondly at the way Brittany saw the world. It's what made her fall in love with the blonde dancer in the first place. Love. Oh,  _Dios mio!_  Brittany was single. This was her first love, right there in front of her, finally available. Santana wasn't available though.  _Shit, mierda, shiit_ (She'd been trying for weeks to get Rachel to teach her swear words in Hebrew – what good was the Jewish diva but to promote her juvenile delinquency – but Rachel begrudgingly informed her that, like many other Hebrew words, saying "shit" in Hebrew was just shit in English…but with Hebrew accenting).

Santana had to get out of here. She needed to go somewhere to think. First, she had to get Brittany home.

She wasn't sure how she got there, but the next thing Santana knew she was getting up from the couch in her living room and going to answer the door. She must have driven Brittany home and then driven back to her house, but she couldn't remember any of it. She was surprised (and yet not) when she opened the door and found Puck standing there. "What?"

"You called five minutes ago and told me I needed to get my 'mowhawked-ass' over to your place and 'bring as much booze as possible.' Check and check. You okay?"

"I don't want to talk about it. Just get the fuck in here and hand over the alcohol."

"Works for me." Puck knew when to keep silent. Santana would tell him when she was ready (and really wasted).

* * *

Santana squinted and tried to swat away the light that was shining in her face. She couldn't figure out why she felt so horrible.  _Why does it feel like every horrible Glee club ever invented is screeching in my ear right now?_  It took her a minute, but she finally realized that her alarm (which she had forgotten to turn off for the weekend) was blaring from her phone which was lying right next to her on the floor.  _Wait, the floor? What the fuck? Jesus, even my mental shouts are hurting right now._

It took another few moments for Santana to realize that she was wrapped up in a towel on the floor of her living room, and…yup, she was completely naked under the towel. As she tried to move carefully so her head wouldn't fall off, Santana hit something to her right that grunted. She almost shrieked like a complete girl, but that would have been too painful. Instead she settled for kicking the thing that made the noise. Puck snorted wildly and rolled into the couch, jerking awake. "Shit, what the hell, San? Ow, how much did we drink? Why are you in a towel? Why am I in your silk bathrobe? Why is the goddamn sun so bright? Wait, when did it become the fucking morning?"

Santana put her hand over his mouth and waited until Puck's eyes focused (as much as they could) on her. "Stop asking so many fucking questions. Quiet the fuck down and I don't know. I can't remember much right now. I'm still trying to figure out where the fuck our clothes went."

Just as Santana was struggling to her feet to try to go find something more suitable to wear, the doorbell rang. " _Dios mio!_ " It rang again and Santana rushed to the door as fast as possible to get the noise to stop. " _Cállate!_ "

Santana froze. This was a nightmare. It had to be. She was not answering her door in nothing but a towel while her girlfriend stood on the other side. She was not watching as Rachel's eyes widened, first in surprise, then in pleasure. This. Could. Not. Be. Happening.

Rachel smiled, "Tana! I can't say I know what prompted this, but I am  _definitely_ not opposed to you answering the door like this for me. Though you should be careful, it could have been anyone." Just as Rachel finished speaking, Puck walked into view of the front door and said, "Hey, San, who is it? It's really too fucking early for solicitors and I am definitely not dressed for it." He glanced up, and the look on his face had to match what Santana was feeling right now.

Rachel's eyes widened even further and Santana could do nothing but watch in horror as the diva's eyes welled up with despair and worse…betrayal. She didn't say anything. She just spun around and raced for her car. Santana swore and raced after her. "Fuck, Rachel! It's not what it looks like!"

Rachel spun back and shouted, "Not what it looks like? Santana, you're in a fucking towel! Puck is naked under your robe, and don't get me started on how ridiculous he looks in that! How could I possibly misunderstand this?"

"I called him because I needed someone to talk to. Brittany broke up with Artie and-" She realized her mistake instantly.

Rachel's face froze over and she whispered, "I see. Brittany is single so you had to figure out what to do. You called Puck to talk about it and drink. Then just to make sure what you feel for her is really real, you slept with him? Is that it?"

"What? That doesn't even make sense!"

"Oh, really? Well, none of this makes sense, Santana! Please tell me how I can be singing with my girlfriend one day and then finding her hung-over and naked with her ex-fuck buddy the next day?"

"I don't know! I can't remember!"

Rachel just looked so broken and resigned. "I should have seen this coming. We were doing well together, but then I said that word we've been avoiding and things started to get tense. You didn't say it, but I could see it. Then the girl of your dreams became single once more, and you didn't know where to turn. So you went to Puck because he can at least give you what I'm not sure I'm ready to give."

"Rachel, listen to yourself. You aren't even making sense. I'm a  _lesbian_. Even if I wanted sex, I wouldn't go to Puck for it. I'm the one who's been stopping us from going further. I want to be with you."

"Yes, but can you honestly tell me that you're not clothing-challenged this morning because you're still in love with Brittany?"

"Rach, beautiful-"

"NO! Don't. Don't call me that. You may not remember what happened last night, and you might not have slept with Puck. But you still can't tell me you love me, can you?"

Santana was at a loss for words. She'd only ever said that word to someone else once, and the end result was her heart eventually being stomped on. She didn't know what she was feeling right now, but either way the words would not leave her mouth.

Rachel smiled the saddest smile Santana had ever seen. "I meant what I said that night we kissed, Tana. You are so precious to me, but I can't be the consolation prize. We both deserve better than that. You need to be with the girl you love with all your heart. Brittany is your first love. Go get her." As Santana went to speak, Rachel placed her finger over her lips to silence her and cupped her cheek. She placed the softest kiss on Santana's cheek and just as she ducked into her car, she whispered, " _Ani ohevet otach_."

As Rachel sped off, Santana stood in the middle of her front yard in just a towel with Rachel's words reverberating through her head. She'd Googled that particular phrase on her own the other day, not wanting to ask Rachel about it. As Puck tried to pull her back inside before she was arrested for public indecency, the translation of those three simple words kept playing on repeat in her mind and began to slowly burn themselves into her rebreaking heart: "I love you."

* * *

Additional note: I know I'm evil! I make the chapter title sound so encouraging and then it ends like this! Don't worry, there will be a light at the end of the tunnel.


	9. Out The Door

Disclaimer:  _Glee_  is the property of Ryan Murphy and his sometimes-crazy mind.

Author's note: Hey all! Here is the latest chapter. There is still strife, but every good story must have some strife. Don't worry; I'm planning something exciting for the next chapter.

* * *

Chapter 9: "Out the Door"

Santana came to school on Monday more pissed than she could ever remember being. She'd tried to call Rachel all of Saturday and Sunday, but Rachel hadn't picked up at all. When Santana finally broke down and went over to her house, Rachel's fathers had refused to let her in.

"We don't know what happened, Santana. She won't talk to us. However, we really can't let you in if Rachel doesn't want to see you. Maybe you can try to talk to her on Monday at school." With that, Leroy closed the door.

Between Brittany calling to ask if she wanted to hang out, almost no memory of the Friday night she spent with Puck, and the stress of constantly texting to – and checking for responses from – Rachel, Santana was in a really shitty mood. The second the Latina walked through the front doors of McKinley High, everyone parted before her and started whispering. The students were just getting used to the slightly nicer version of Santana who would walk the halls with Rachel Berry and get pulled away by the shorter girl whenever she felt tempted to punch someone. Now? Now they were all getting out of the way and running for cover from the girl who was exuding anger with every step she took towards her locker.

As Santana opened her locker, she felt a hand fall on her shoulder.

"Hey, lesbro, how you doing?"

"Get. Your. Fucking. Hand. Off. My. Shoulder."

"Whoa! What'd I do?" As he asked this, Puck definitely removed his hand as fast as humanly possible.

"I can't even look at you right now. I went to you for help this weekend, Puck, and all I got was fucked!"

Puck smirked, but when he saw that Santana wasn't in a laughing mood, he schooled his face into a more serious expression.

"San, I know you're upset, but come on."

"No! Go the fuck away. All you do is fuck up my life!"

Puck looked around and realized that they were starting to draw a crowd. Making a decision, he grabbed Santana's arm and dragged her towards the gym. It was too early in the morning for anyone to be in there. The space would be perfect for what he had in mind.

"What the hell, Puck! What part of 'go away' did you not understand?"

"The part where I don't care. San, you need to stop doing this. You just bottle all your shit up and take it out on everyone around you."

"What are you, a fucking therapist? I'm fine."

"No, you're not," Puck forcefully stated. "You need to face the fact that you're pissed off at yourself, not Rachel, not Brittany, and not me."

"You don't know shit!" Santana shouted.

"I've known you since you were in diapers, San. I was your first boyfriend and your first time. I know you better than you think. So come on, get it all out. I'm here."

"Fuck you! I don't need to get shit out, and you don't know anything about me. If you did, you would've told me to get over myself. You wouldn't have come over and I would've gone to Rachel's. You would have helped me with me, not help me fuck everything up!" With that, Santana threw a punch at Puck's face. He took it, spit blood on the floor, and just let her keep going.

"I would still have a girlfriend if Brittany hadn't said anything! I would still be with Rachel if you hadn't come over to my fucking house! I would be spending my days with her if you hadn't let me drink! I wouldn't have given Rachel a reason to doubt me if we'd just kept our fucking clothes on and not gone skinny dipping in my pool! Why couldn't I just say the words? She just needed to hear the fucking words, and I couldn't pull my head out of my ass long enough to say them!"

Santana kept punching, only this time she was hitting his stomach, each hit falling with less and less strength behind it. Through it all, Santana just kept saying over and over, "Fucked it up. Fucked it up. Why? Why am I such a fuck-up?" When Santana finally stopped hitting and started crying, Puck wrapped his arms around her and held her as they both slid to the floor.

After a while, when her tears seemed to have mostly stopped, Puck asked, "You okay now?"

Santana sniffed and wiped her nose with the back of her bruised knuckles. "No," she paused. "I don't think I'll ever be okay again." When Puck didn't have anything to really say to that, Santana asked, in the smallest voice Puck had ever heard her use, "Can you just hold me for a few minutes more?"

Puck nodded and they just sat there on the floor of the gym, covered in a mix of blood and tears, one friend trying to help hold together the broken pieces of the other.

* * *

In the weeks following their breakup, Rachel mostly hung out with Kurt and – almost by accident – Blaine hung out a lot more with Santana. They weren't choosing sides, as they both pointed out repeatedly; they simply wanted to be there for their friends. The coffee shop trips that they all used to share were a little problematic, but Kurt would text Blaine if he and Rachel were headed there, and vice versa, and they managed to avoid most run-ins.

Blaine and Santana were chatting one day when it was brought up that she (and the other Troubletones) had not had a chance to sing any Michael Jackson with New Directions.

"It's crazy! I would totes have  _killed_  singing Michael songs."

"I know! We should ask Mr. Schue if we can sing Michael songs this week for our assignment."

"Warbler, you're a genius. This is why we're friends."

Just as they were finishing this conversation, Sebastian walked up behind them at the coffee shop. "Do my ears deceive me? Did I hear someone mention Michael Jackson? That can't be true, because The Warblers are going to be doing Michael and I know that we can top you in any song you choose to sing."

Santana almost crushed her coffee cup in her hand in frustration. "We can sing circles around your asses, OW."

Sebastian snorted and said, "Sure you could, you Latina lesbian you."

Blaine had to hold Santana back from slugging Sebastian. While he didn't understand a lot of Spanish, he was pretty sure she was calling the other boy some pretty unpleasant things.

"First, we're all gay here, so lay off the gay jokes, Sebastian. They're low. Second, let's see who's better. The Warblers against New Directions. Sing-off."

"Fine by me. Just name the time and place. We'll be there."

"Oh, we'll be there, dipshit," Santana growled. "You just better bring it, bitch."

That night found both clubs in the parking garage at the mall, facing off. Santana had to admit, it was a pretty awesome showdown. They sang the shit out of  _Bad_ , and Santana was actually having a lot of fun (though it did hurt whenever she had to sing near Rachel and listen to her sing in return). In the end, however, the entire night was ruined when Sebastian threw a slushy that hit Blaine directly in the eyes.

"What the fuck?" Santana shouted, but just as she and all the other Glee guys were about to kick the shit out of Sebastian, Kurt yelled to get their attention. Blaine was on the ground crying out in pain, and he wasn't getting up. Something was definitely wrong. They rushed him to the hospital and when they were told that there was something in the slushy that had scratched Blaine's eye, Santana saw red.

Puck and Sam jumped in front of Santana to stop her from leaving the hospital. "San, you don't want to do anything stupid," Puck warned.

"No, I really,  _really_  do."

Sam agreed, "Come on, Santana, you'll get into more trouble than it's worth."

"More than it's worth? That's my fucking friend in there!  _Perra_ _pagará_!"

Santana was about ready to slug both of the boys trying to prevent her from leaving. It wasn't until Rachel, who was comforting Kurt, spoke up that Santana stopped trying to fight her way out of the hospital.

"Santana. Yes, Sebastian is a bitch, and yes, he will pay, but right now we need to be here for our friends."

Santana tried to hold Rachel's eyes since these were the first words that the other girl had said to Santana in about a month, but once the diva had said what she needed to, she went back to focusing on Kurt…which is what Santana decided to do. She'd take care of Blaine, make sure he was okay (and by extension, Kurt and Rachel), and then she'd go all Lima Heights Adjacent on Sebastian's ass.

The beat down ended up being a battle of voices, and Santana totally slaughtered Sebastian during their  _Smooth Criminal_  battle (and God she wished Rachel could have seen how smoking hot she was in her suit and fedora), but of course what she'd been trying to do was get him to admit that he put something else in the slushy, something designed to hurt Blaine's eyes. She got a recording of it, but when she brought it to her teammates, they all (including her eventually) decided that the more important thing was to make sure that the Warblers knew what kind of Captain they had. The look on Sebastian's face  _was_  pretty entertaining when his team ditched him to dance and sing with New Directions. Santana might have also spoken to the Principal of Dalton, and Sebastian was suspended for a week and put on probation as the Captain of the Warblers.  _Take that permanent mark on your record, bitch! What? If I'm not allowed to punch him in his smug little face, I can at least get him into trouble for the shit that he deserves._

All in all, it could have been a worse outcome. However, Santana still couldn't smile about it as she watched Rachel leave Blaine's house from her car, waiting for the girl to leave before she went to check on Warbles. She'd trade making that ass-hat Sebastian suffer in a minute for even one smile sent her way from Rachel.

* * *

As the next week passed, Santana's mood just got worse. She hadn't threatened to hit anyone in the school for a while now, but she really hadn't needed to (after everyone saw what Puck's face and Santana's knuckles looked like that first day she'd been back in school, people were pretty much staying out of her way). The fact that Rachel wouldn't even look at her was killing her, and it hurt more and more now that Rachel had actually showed that she cared enough about Santana to stop her from attacking Sebastian. When Spanish class rolled around and Mr. Schue insisted on continuing to butcher her native tongue, Santana snapped.  _I may have to sit here with a broken heart, but I don't have to listen to this shit. I could teach this class better than Mr. Schue._  This is why she reported him to the Principal.

When she discovered that they were going to have a sing-off with the fluently Spanish-speaking David Martinez (who is totally gay, by the way, in every sense of the word), she was thrilled. Hopefully they could get this shit dealt with. She was gearing up for her performance of  _La Isla Bonita_  when Brittany came up to her.

"Hi, San!"

"Hey, Britt. How're you?"

"Oh, I'm great. I was tempted to push Artie down the stairs this morning, but I knew that it would be unfair to possibly make other people be in wheelchairs if he fell on them."

Santana smiled. Brittany always made her smile no matter how sad she was feeling.

"There! I've been looking for that smile on your face all day, San. I'm glad that worked. Why are you sad?"

"What makes you think I'm sad, Britt?" Santana said glancing away and trying to deflect from the conversation she  _really_  didn't want to have right now.

"Santana. I can tell when you're sad. You always tell me not to call myself stupid. So please don't treat me like I am."

Santana jerked her eyes up to Brittany's quickly and said, "Hey, I would never—" at Brittany's severe look (the one where Santana always knew she was in trouble), Santana chuckled and shook her head.

"You're right. You always are." Brittany nodded her head.

"I know. So what's really wrong?"

"Just…emotional stuff."

"Did you and Rachel get into a fight?"

Santana looked more closely at her friend.

"Why would you think it had something to do with Rachel?"

"Well, you guys have been dating for a while now, and you didn't walk in together this morning. Rachel hasn't been talking to anyone and you just keep glaring."

Santana gaped at Brittany. "How did you know we were dating?"

"Oh, please, San. I've been able to read your heart in your eyes for years. Plus, I saw you two kissing, and I know that you only go into the janitor's closet to make out with people."

Shaking her head, Santana nodded and gave a sad sigh, "We were together. Now? Not so much."

"Is this because I broke up with Artie?"

"Yes. No. I don't know."

"Well, that's just silly, San. You know I love you, but I never thought we would get back together."

Santana raised her eyebrow.

"Why not?"

"San, I've never seen you look at anyone the way you look at Rachel, not even me." When Santana tried to argue, Brittany just smiled and linked her pinky with the Latina's. "It's okay. I only ever wanted you to be happy, San. I know I broke your heart, but she healed it again. In fact, she made it stronger. You and Rachel just need to stop acting like those ducklings at the pond who can't find the bread crumbs I throw at them. I enjoyed being a unicorn with you for a little while, San, but you're each other's crabs."

Now Santana was really confused.

"Crabs mate for life, silly."

Ducks, unicorns, crabs. This is why Santana was friends with Brittany.

She hugged her friend tight, and then she turned and went to perform. They blew everyone away of course. As Santana sat in the audience watching Mr. Schue's  _horrible_  performance, she tried not to glance at Rachel a few rows ahead and to the left of her.

When he was done, she couldn't help it. She had to speak up. "Seriously? That's what you came up with?"

Mr. Schue looked towards Santana and saw the look on her face. It finally clicked for him. "It was you, wasn't it? You reported me to Principal Figgins."

Everyone turned to stare at Santana, and she shrugged her shoulders. "Of course I did. Do you have any idea what your 'teaching' in Spanish class is doing? You're taking stupid stereotypes and you're making students believe them as well. You also really suck at actually translating and speaking Spanish."

When Mr. Schue went to argue, another voice spoke up. "She's right, Mr. Schue. You're an excellent Glee coach, but you know next to nothing about Spanish. "

Mr. Schue responded, "Rachel?"

"I know how to speak Spanish, which is why I've never said anything in class, since I can still pass, but it is quite detrimental to those others who really do need to learn."

Santana went to smile at Rachel for her support, but the shorter girl still wouldn't look at her. Shaking her head, Santana glanced back at Mr. Schue and said, "Look, I know I'm a bitch, but I'm guessing you originally took the Spanish teacher job because it was the only one open. I just think you need to admit that someone else can do it better like Mr. Martinez. You know, a wise teacher once taught me that without passion, there is no success."

Mr. Schue smiled at Santana with tears in his eyes and said, "You know what? You're right. Thank you, Santana."

As everyone started to file out of the auditorium, Santana ran after Rachel and grabbed her wrist from behind, stopping her from leaving.

"Thanks for standing up for me against Mr. Schue."

Rachel didn't turn; she just nodded her head and said, "You're my friend, Santana. It's what friends do."

"Friends? Is that it? Is that all we are?"

Rachel pulled her wrist from Santana's hand and turned. "Yes, friends. That's all we can be, Santana. Please just let me go."

"Rach—"

Santana never got to finish her sentence as Rachel continued to shake her head furiously and back away from her. "I can't, Santana. I saw you with Brittany before the performance, and I saw the way you hugged one another. I'm…I'm really happy for you, but I'm just too hurt right now to talk to you. Please. I just…I can't."

Rachel ran away before Santana could say anything in response, and all Santana could do was wrap her arms around herself and swear.  _Great, just fucking great. Mierda. Now she thinks that I'm back together with Britt. This really couldn't get any fucking worse._  Santana hung her head feeling more defeated than ever, which was something she was definitely not used to. Slowly, she trudged out the door.

* * *

Additional note: I am so sorry that I had to end this chapter like this! I promise, the next chapter is what I've been leading up to.


	10. Just Because

Disclaimer: Thank you, Ryan Murphy, for creating a crazy awesome show like  _Glee_ , which I sadly do not own nor profit from.

Author's note: Okay, folks, here it is! Chapter 10! I had a lot of fun writing this, and I hope that it's what you've all been waiting for. 

* * *

Chapter 10: "Just Because"

At the beginning of the next week, Santana was once again walking through the halls of McKinley when something was shoved into her face. It took her a second to understand what she was reading, but once she did she was truly horrified. Glancing up, she realized that it was totally true: it was the week of Valentine's Day, and she had completely forgotten!  _Fuck! I really should have called in sick this week._

This was just the beginning of a truly shitty-ass day. Santana spent most of it dodging Brittany (not because she didn't want to see her friend, but because Brittany thought Valentine's Day meant you had to hug everyone in sight. Repeatedly. Santana's ribs still felt bruised from last Valentine's Day). Thankfully, she didn't have to see many Glee members until the afternoon, but she still couldn't help noticing that Finn seemed to be following Rachel around a lot more than normal. Ugh.

It would not be an exaggeration to say that Santana was exhausted by the time she reached Glee: she'd been really good, but if one more idiot tried to throw red heart confetti in her face, she's pop a cap in their ass. All of this stress – combined with the passing thought that when they were still together Santana had made a mental note to make this day really special for Rachel – meant that when she walked into the choir room and saw Finn invading Rachel's personal space, she was about ready to snap.

"Hey, Rach."

"Oh, hi, Finn."

"I was just thinking…"

_HA! That's a first_ , Santana thought.

"Sugar mentioned that she is throwing that Valentine's Day Party this weekend…"

Rachel was beginning to look uncomfortable. "Yes?"

"We should totally go together."

"Why?"

"What?"

"Why should we go together, Finn? We're friends, and I'm not sure we want to confuse that at all."

"Well, yeah, but we would get back together."

Santana's eyes narrowed instantly, and Rachel's voice rose attracting the other Glee members who were filing in and sitting down.

"I'm sorry, what? Why would we get back together, Finn?"

"Rachel, we're both not dating anyone, and I've decided that you're who I want, so—"

"Oh, you  _decided_ , did you? Do I have any say in this?" Rachel was getting angrier and angrier, and Finn seemed to be the only one not to notice. Everyone else was shrinking down in their seats trying not to get hit by the fallout. Rachel was about to go supernova.

Finn looked confused, "Yeah, I know that we had our issues, but I know that you've always been in love with me. So why wouldn't we get back together?"

Before Rachel could explode, her attention and everyone else's was diverted by one  _very_  pissed off Latina and the mohawked boy who was trying to hold her back.

" _Decidio? Decided?_  You didn't decide shit,  _puta_!"

"Santana, calm down."

"Calm down? Calm down? Did you not hear what that fuck-face said to her?"

"Santana, I can fight my own battles—"

"You shouldn't have to fight this battle! You're worth fighting for, and this fucking "mailman" mantra-ing, pre-ejaculating piece of shit can't see that you're worth more than what he can't even _dream_  of having with you!"

"Screw you, Santana. You don't know anything. Rachel and I are meant to be."

"Meant to be? No, Finn, you're not meant to be. She's on her way to Broadway. She's gonna light that place up like a fucking fireworks show on the Fourth of July, and all you want to do is convince her that being the wife of a former quarterback living in Lima, Ohio, is what she should really want."

"How do you know what she really wants, Santana?" Finn glared at the girl, and everyone seemed to be frozen watching the scene unfold, even Rachel.

"I know because she told me! Day after day, on every date and with every song she sang not just for herself but for me, too! I know because Rachel was my girlfriend."

"What? That's ridiculous."

Santana snorted, "What's ridiculous is that I ever let her go."

Santana turned to Rachel, whose jaw dropped.

"I should have fought for you, beautiful. I should have gone after you that day outside my place. Puck and I didn't sleep together. We just got really drunk when I told him that I love you and then he suggested skinny dipping—"

"You what?"

Santana looked confused.

Rachel repeated herself, "What did you just say? Before the skinny dipping part."

Santana smiled when she realized what she had finally said out loud.

"I love you. Puck came over to my house after Brittany told me she was single because I realized that it didn't matter. I am totally and completely in love with you. Stupidly so. That time you saw me in the auditorium with Brittany? She was telling me that you and I are meant for each other. I couldn't agree more."

Rachel was crying and gasped out, "Why didn't you tell me?"

Santana was crying now, too, "Because I was terrified – terrified of opening my heart like that. I was terrified of getting in even deeper and then losing you."

"Say it again. Please."

"I love you. I'll say it as many times as you need me to. I'll shout it at the top of my lungs. I'll tell the entire school—"

Santana was cut off by Rachel's lips, as the smaller girl threw herself into the taller one's arms. In between kisses she said, "I…don't…care…about…anyone…else. I love you too, baby, more than I can ever say."

Rachel and Santana get so lost in one another that they fail to notice that they were most definitely the center of attention in the choir room. Kurt and Blaine were holding hands and smiling, while Kurt whispered, "I knew it!" Puck appeared to be trying not to get turned on. Quinn looked a little shocked but pleased with the course of events. Brittany couldn't stop clapping and jumping up and down, and everyone else seemed pretty shocked but overall accepting. Finn…Finn's reaction became obvious pretty quickly. He grabbed Santana by the shoulders, turned her around, and punched her in the face.

"Finn! Go to the principal's office right now!"

Mr. Schue was absolutely livid. He's always had a soft spot for Finn, but punching anyone, especially a girl, was not something that could be overlooked. No one could believe that Finn had done that, but Santana was on the floor with a split, bleeding lip and Rachel was crouched down next to her. Kurt and Blaine rushed over and handed Puck, who was closer, some paper towels to hopefully stop the bleeding.

"Mr. Schue! That slut turned Rachel into a dyke!"

"Finn, I can't believe you would use a word like that!" Kurt was the one who spoke up. "I thought we covered this after you called me a fag."

"I…Rachel and I were supposed to end up together! Besides, Santana slapped me before."

Rachel spoke almost too softly for anyone but those closest to her to hear, "Finn, I will excuse this incident only because I know you're upset. However, if you do not stop fucking talking right this minute, you will be the one with a split lip, and you'll have a black eye to go with it. We aren't together, and we haven't been for a long time. I love Santana, and she loves me. Accept it and move on. It is never okay for anyone to use violence, and Santana has been working to control her desire to punch people when she's upset. I would recommend that you do the same before you get suspended from school."

Finn had nothing to say to that, and Mr. Schue spoke up once more, "Finn, Rachel seems to think you don't need to have this officially reported. However, I am going to give you detention with Coach Sylvester for a month. I'm also going to suggest that Coach Beiste bench you for at least two games."

When Finn looked like he was going to protest, Santana spoke up from the floor, "Suck it up, Finnept. I had to answer to Coach Sylvester for two months when I slapped you since I'm one of her Cheerios and I got caught in the act. You're getting off easy."

Everything calmed down after that. Finn was sent home for the day while Rachel and Santana sat next to one another holding hands. Neither one of them could stop smiling. Santana didn't even care that her cut lip hurt; she was too happy to give a flying fuck.

The rest of the week was spent in romantic bliss for Santana and Rachel. They spent almost every second of the day together, except for the nights when they had to go home. Even then, when Santana woke up she would call Rachel just to make sure that none of it was a dream. If it had been any other couple, Santana would have been disgusted by the behavior. But she had waited all her life to feel like this so all the haters could go take a short walk off a long cliff.

Before either of them knew it, it was just before Sugar's Valentine's Day party, and Santana was walking up to Rachel's door to pick up her girlfriend for their date. She rang the doorbell, and when Rachel opened the door all the Latina could do was stare. Rachel was in a similar predicament.

Rachel was wearing a short black dress with spaghetti straps.  _Short like wow-those-skirts-you-wear-at-school-are-really-kind-of-long short. Damn._  She had finished the outfit off with her hair up in high bun and a pair of cute strappy heels.  _Jesus! How can she be so short but have such long, amazing legs?_

Rachel was equally breathless because Santana looked – to quote her – "Damn fine!" Santana was wearing a strapless red dress that hugged her curves in all the right places, her hair fell in soft waves around her face and shoulders, and she had on a pair of black short heeled boots. If she didn't think it would be rude, Rachel would have grabbed her girlfriend and pulled her forcefully into her house – locking the door and locking out the rest of the world.

"You look…fuck, Rach. I would totally take you right now if I didn't think I would get slapped for making us late." Santana was joking (mostly), but her breath got caught in her throat when Rachel pulled her down by the back of her neck for a deep kiss. When she finally let her go, Rachel moved her lips to Santana's ear and whispered, "If you're really good tonight, I might just  _let_  you have me. My fathers are gone for the weekend."

For the first time in her life, Santana almost fainted. She groaned and was instantly wetter than she'd ever been.  _Well, fuck. Those panties are ruined._

With that, Rachel smirked and sashayed her way to Santana's car, with the other girl following behind her in a haze of sexual desire and longing.

* * *

By the time dinner was over, both girls were so horny and on edge that they were about ready to fuck each other in the parking lot. When they were still dating a couple of months ago, things were getting pretty hot and heavy. The time apart had not lessened their desire for one another: it had, in fact, only built up their frustration. Now that they were back together, all they could both think about was touching each other, getting lost in tongues and teeth and sweat. This night? This moment? This is what they were waiting for.

Santana had never driven her car so fast. When Rachel kissed Santana's neck and put her hand on her thigh, she started slowly sliding it up Santana's leg creeping ever closer to the heat between her legs. Santana was just glad that they were lucky enough to avoid cops and that she was still able to hold onto the steering wheel and not veer off the road. It was nothing short of a fucking miracle.

"Baby, if you don't stop that— _Dios mio!_ —I'm…I'm gonna crash into a tree, and we aren't even going to make it to your house. I really don't want to try to explain to your dads why we totaled my car and ended up in the hospital."

Rachel chuckled and, after giving one more kiss to Santana's neck, she slowly pulled back her hand making sure to drag her short nails along the inside of Santana's thigh.

Santana exhaled sharply and said, "You're gonna be the death of me, babygirl."

Rachel nodded, "Mmmm, but what a way to go."

They made it back to Rachel's in record time, and Santana shut off the engine and pulled Rachel from the car so fast she almost gave the other girl whiplash.

"Slow down, Tana. We have all night. In fact, we have all weekend."

"I know. I've just been waiting for this for a long time. Waiting for you."

"I know. Me too, love. Me too."

Rachel unlocked the door and the moment it closed behind them Santana had her up against it.

Santana captured Rachel's lips in a fierce kiss that had both girls completely breathless. When she came up for air, Santana started to kiss down Rachel's neck. Once her lips latched onto Rachel's pulse point, the shorter girl moaned very loudly, and all Santana could do was smirk and suck harder. Rachel was definitely going to have a hickey for the next couple of days.  _She's gonna kill me, but damn I really enjoy marking her like that._

As Santana ran her tongue along Rachel's neck, the Diva ran her hands, which were in Santana's hair, down her back, and it was Santana's turn to moan as Rachel dug her nails into her back. Santana reached back and grabbed Rachel's hands pulling them together so they were in one of her hands and held them against the door. "Uh-uh, I'm having too much fun with your neck. No distracting me."

Rachel smirked, "But Tana, what if I want to have fun, too?"

"Well, you'll just have to wait,  _chica sucia_."

Rachel laughed and tried to free her hands, but all that achieved was both of their dresses riding up their thighs as they struggled with one another. When Rachel stopped fighting her, Santana was sure that she had won. That is until Rachel raised her right leg up straight into Santana's spread legs. Santana moaned and dropped the other girl's hands instantly as she grabbed onto Rachel's hips and tried to control herself.

"You did say I was the 'dirty girl.' I just thought I should follow that up with something. What'd you think, too much?" Santana could hear Rachel's laughter in her voice.

"Rach, if you do that again, I'm not gonna make it upstairs to your bedroom. I'm not gonna make it past this door."

"What, this?" With that, Rachel attempted to lift her leg once more. However, Santana had enough warning, and before Rachel knew what was happening, she was lifted off her feet and Santana was carrying her over her shoulder.

"Santana! Put me down this instant!"

"Ooh, you're so terrifying with your short little legs kicking out like that."

"Santana, if you do not put me down this instant, you are sleeping on the couch!"

The next instant, Rachel was standing on her own two feet, and Santana was looking only slightly contrite.

"I did tell you what would happen if you tried that again, Rach."

Rachel stepped closer and looked up at Santana through her eyelashes, "What makes you think I didn't want that to happen?"

When Santana looked confused and a little aroused, Rachel leaned even closer and whispered, "I would love nothing more than to see you come undone because of me, Tana. So…Santana, don't you think it's about time we go upstairs and finally make love to one another like we've been dying to since the minute we first kissed?"

Santana swallowed deeply and followed as Rachel led her by the hand upstairs. Once they made it inside Rachel's bedroom, the little Diva seemed to finally realize the magnitude of what they were planning on doing and started to fiddle with things around the room to try to hold off her nerves. Santana thought it was adorable, but she also knew that she had to take over from here.

"Rachel, can you look at me, please?" Rachel looked Santana directly in the eyes.

"Are you sure you are ready for this?"

The simple fact that Santana had thought to check in one more time seemed to give Rachel the confidence she needed. She nodded assuredly and reached for Santana's hand.

Santana took Rachel's fingers and kissed the tip of each one. When she got to her pointer finger, Santana put the entire finger into her mouth running her tongue all around it. Rachel moaned and closed her eyes in pleasure. Santana pulled the finger from her mouth and pulled Rachel closer to her as she sat on the bed.

" _Horcajadas_ _mí._ "

Rachel nodded and did exactly that: she straddled Santana's legs. Santana brought her hands up and slowly began to take out the pins that were holding up Rachel's hair. Once they were all gone, Rachel's hair fell around them cocooning them in a private world of their own making. They kissed passionately. As Rachel ran her tongue along Santana's lips, the other girl slid her hands along Rachel's thighs. When she straddled her, Rachel's dress had slid even higher, so Santana was treated to the glorious skin of almost all of Rachel's legs.

"Fuck, you have amazing legs, Rach."

Rachel moaned at the sensation of Santana's hands tracing patterns higher and higher on her thighs. "Mmmm, I love when you touch me like that. Your hands feel fantastic, baby."

Encouraged by Rachel's words, Santana slid her hands even further, and was greeted by the hottest thing ever: Rachel was wearing a thong. A lacy, delicate thong that was just begging to be ripped off. She dug her fingers deeply into Rachel's ass and Rachel moaned louder, grabbed Santana's head, and pulled her lips back to kiss her once more. She pulled back and said, "Santana, there's foreplay and then there's teasing. We're crossing that line right now."

Santana chuckled, "I just want to make sure you're nice and ready for me, baby."

Arching her brow, Rachel grabbed one of Santana's hands off her ass and moved it around between her legs. Santana moaned at the sudden movement, and Rachel groaned at the feel of Santana's hand on her.

"Fuck, babe, you're dripping."

"I am  _definitely_  ready for you, Tana."

That was all Santana needed to hear. She wanted to make this special for Rachel, but it was a little hard to go slow when the girl in question was making her feel how incredibly wet and willing she was. Santana flipped them over so Rachel was lying down on the bed with Santana between her legs. She had Rachel sit up and slipped off her black dress, at which point she also took her own red dress off as well. Their underwear was the next to go; with neither one really paying attention to the silk nor lace that each of them was wearing. All they really wanted in that moment was one another. Santana propped herself over her shorter girlfriend and looked deep into Rachel's eyes. She watched the Diva's face as she slipped her hand downward and traced her fingers towards her pussy. Rachel tried to keep her eyes open, but as Santana's fingers rubbed over her clit, she couldn't help but arch into the other girl and moan deeply. However, she opened them once more when Santana stopped the movement of her hand right at her entrance.

"I want you to look at me when I take your virginity. I want you to know that you're loved and that the look in your eyes right now is the fucking hottest thing I have ever seen." It was such a Santana thing to say – the perfect combination of sweet and dirty. Nevertheless, Rachel was too distracted (which was the plan all along) to realize that Santana had thrust into her, breaking her barrier in one swift move. Rachel gasped and Santana held completely still. "Shhh, you're okay,  _hermosa_. I won't move until you tell me you're ready."

Rachel had never felt more in love than in that moment. Yes, she was in pain, but Santana was right there with her – kissing her forehead, her eyelids, and her lips with the gentlest of touches. After a minute she nodded her head and Santana started to move her hand. It was like nothing Rachel had ever felt, and all she could do was grip onto Santana's shoulders and try not to be swept away by the sensations. After a while, even that became impossible.

"Oh, God, Tana. So good."

"You like that, baby?"

"So much. Please."

"Please what?" Santana smirked. Even in bed she couldn't stop being at least a little bit of a bitch.

"Please, I need more."

"More of this?" With that, Santana added a third finger, and Rachel had to grab onto the pillow under her head for support.

"Fuck! Harder."

That definitely made Santana smile, and she decided to give Rachel exactly what she asked for. She gripped behind Rachel's back and told her to wrap her legs around her waist. Rachel looked a little confused, but she did as Santana said and Santana sat up taking Rachel with her. This changed the angle of her fingers within Rachel and caused the other girl to shout, "Santana!"

"Mmmm, that's it, baby."

Rachel gripped onto Santana's shoulders once more and they moved together with Santana thrusting into Rachel fast and hard, hitting her g-spot every time. Her body started to tremble, and Santana could feel Rachel's internal walls begin to clamp down on her fingers.

"Come on,  _hermosa_ , that's right. Come for me. Fucking come for me, Rachel."

With those words and a swipe of her thumb across Rachel's clit, Rachel looked deep into Santana's eyes and came.

"Fuck, Santana!"

It was the strongest orgasm Rachel had ever had, and it was the sexiest thing Santana had ever seen. In fact, her reaction was so strong that Santana was surprised that she didn't come as well simply from watching Rachel.

As Rachel came down from her climax, Santana held her up and slowly lowered her down to lay flat on the bed. When Rachel finally opened her eyes, she couldn't seem to stop smiling, and neither could Santana.

"That…I don't have words for how amazing that was, Tana."

"Those are pretty good words."

"Well, still. I think you need a little something more to understand how much I loved that." That was all the warning Santana had before Rachel flipped her over and started to kiss down her neck.

Santana laughed, "Aren't you tired? This is not a very good sign if you recovered this quickly from this supposedly 'amazing' orgasm."

"Or it bodes really well since it means that I apparently have great recovery time. Just think: endless energy for hours of fun in the bedroom."

"Or the living room, or the kitchen, or the janitor's closet—"

Santana was cut off by her own moan as Rachel did something that she was sure would take her a while to work up to: she ran her tongue along Santana's clit.

"Jesus, Rach, warn a girl."

"Where would the fun be in that?" Rachel smirked and went back to exploring this new part of Santana's body.

"Mmm, you taste amazing, Tana. I could lick you for hours."

"Oh, babe, you won't need hours. I'm so close already from making you come. I'm about ready to pop."  
With that in mind, Rachel switched up the speed of her tongue. She added a little more pressure and speed, and she moved her tongue from the left to right quickly until Santana was gripping the back of her neck and moaning almost constantly.

"Fuck,  _por favor, hermosa_. I…I just need a little more. I…I need… _tan cerca_."

Santana was about to tell Rachel once more that she just needed a little more of  _something_  when she gasped and arched her back off the bed.

" _Dios mío_! Fuck yes! Just like that, Rachel."

Rachel had slid her hand up and thrust two fingers deep into Santana. She moved her fingers in and out of her girlfriend until she found her g-spot. (Rachel may have done some research on the subject of lesbian sex in preparation for this night. God bless Google.) She went back to swiping her tongue back and forth and rubbed just hard enough inside Santana tandem with her tongue outside that the other girl came undone almost instantly.

"Rachel!"

Rachel pulled back and slid back up the bed. When Santana was aware enough, she shook her head and said, "I should have known you would fucking  _excel_ at sex along with everything else you put your mind to."

Rachel chuckled, "Or tongue to as ever the case may be."

Santana just laughed out loud at the silliness of the statement, at the perfectness of this moment, at all of it, and wrapped her arms around her girlfriend.

"I fucking love you, Rachel Barbra Berry. I don't know why sometimes, but I really do."

"Well, I fucking love you too, Santana Marie Lopez. Do you want to know why?"

"Why?"

"Just because."


	11. This Morning

Disclaimer:  _Glee_  is not at all owned by me. Sad days.

* * *

Chapter 11: "This Morning"

Santana woke up feeling extremely sore but completely sated. It took her a minute to remember why her body was so achy, but when she did she couldn't stop the smug grin on her face. Turning over, she fully expected to find Rachel out of bed and doing her morning exercise routine since her girl just could not take a day off most days. Almost immediately, Santana realized that she was wrong: there, sprawled out across the bed on her stomach, was her girlfriend. She was hugging her pillow under her head, and she was  _definitely_  dead to the world.

Santana grinned and jumped out of bed (well, she stumbled out of bed, because  _damn_  the sex last night wore her out!) and went to the bathroom. As she crawled back into bed, she glanced at the clock and her constant grin got even wider. It was 10:00 a.m., and Rachel Barbra I-Can't-Sleep-Past-The-Sun-Coming-Up-AKA-Balls-Ass-Early Berry was still in bed! Score one for Santana in the sexing her girlfriend into a coma department. Santana decided that she didn't want to wake Rachel and that more sleep was totally fine with her. she got back into bed, threw her arm over her Diva, and drifted off to dreamland once more while the smell of sex and the unique scent that was Rachel wrapped around her.

A while later, both girls were woken abruptly by  _Get Happy/Happy Days Are Here Again_  blaring out of Rachel's phone.

Rachel was the first one to wake this time. Santana grunted as Rachel leaned over and grabbed her cell phone thereby effectively lying on top of the Latina (not that she minded at all since they were both naked).

In a hoarse voice, Rachel mumbled out, "What is it, Kurt?"

"Rachel? Were you still asleep? Since they were so close together, Santana could hear what Kurt was saying through the phone as well, and she smirked at the boy's confusion.

"Yes, of course I was. Why is that such a shock?"

"I just figured you would be up hours ago to do your morning exercise."

"I don't get up at dawn on Saturdays, Kurt. Why are you calling?"

"Well, I thought you might like to come meet me and Blaine at the coffee shop around noon. Do you think you could call Santana and ask her as well?

"Kurt, I do appreciate the offer, but was it necessary to call me this early when you are asking to meet around lunchtime?"

"Early? Hun, it's 11:30 a.m."

Rachel shot straight up in bed and almost screeched when she shouted, "11:30?"

Santana covered her ears, grabbed Rachel around the waist and pushed her back onto the bed. She grabbed the phone from the shocked girl and told Kurt, "We'll be there, but it might be a little later than noon."

"Santana? What are you doing in Rachel's house when she's sleep—oh."

Santana smirked at the mortified tone of Kurt's voice and hung up the phone to pay attention to more important things…like her very naked girlfriend.

"Santana, how could you possibly let me sleep this late? I need to do my morning exercises!"

"First of all, I did not  _let_  you do anything. Your body decided to sleep in. Secondly, I think we got plenty of exercise in last night and early this morning." Santana kissed along Rachel's jaw, and the other girl moaned and wrapped her arms around Santana's neck.

"Tana, we can't. We have to go meet Kurt and Blaine."

"They'll understand. I'm sure they've gotten sexed up before. Now shut up, I wants to get my mack on."

Rachel laughed, "Santana Marie Lopez, don't tell me to shut up."

"Fine, then I'll just have to keep your mouth busy."

"Oh, really? And how, pray tell, are you going to do that?"

Santana smirked, "Let me show you,  _hermosa_."

Rachel managed to pull away before their kissing could get too heated. "Oh, no. I know what a smooth operator you are, Tana. Come on, we have to get up and get out of bed. We both need to shower before we leave, because while I love the smell of sex and you on my skin, I'm not sure the rest of the world would appreciate it quite as much."

"Says you. Two hot  _chicas_  like us getting it on? We're most men's fantasy come to life."

"Yes, well, I doubt that's true for Kurt and Blaine, and I would rather we were each other's fantasy, not anyone else's."

Rachel headed towards the bathroom and was pleasantly surprised when Santana joined her after only a few minutes.

"What are you doing in here?"

"Conserving water, of course. It's good for the environment and all that shit. Plus, you totally can't reach your back all by yourself, what with your short arms and all."

Rachel shook her head, but as her girlfriend's arms wrapped around her from behind and Santana started kissing her neck where it joined with her shoulder, Rachel found she really couldn't put up any resistance. Santana made her feel beautiful and sexy and really fucking horny, so why should she try to stop her advances?

As Rachel moaned and arched her neck back, Santana pressed her into the wall of the shower. The tile was cold on Rachel's nipples and shorter girl moaned even louder as she felt Santana press her entire body along her back.

"Do you know what you did to me this morning when you reached for your phone, Rach? Your nipples ran along my back, and all I wanted to do was roll over and take one into my mouth. Fuck, the noises you make when I run my tongue along them and then bite down? God, you make me so fucking wet when you moan, babe. Like the noises you're making right now? Are your nipples aching? Do you want me to warm them with my tongue? Is that what you want, Rach?"

Rachel nodded her head jerkily and continued to moan, thrusting her ass back into Santana's pelvis.

"What was that, babe? I didn't quite hear you."

Rachel groaned and said, "Fuck, Tana, please. I need you."

"Need me to do what? Use your words, Rachel."

"I need you to suck my nipples.  _Please_."

"Well, when you say it so nicely…"

With that, Santana spun Rachel around and pushed her back against the wall. She trailed her tongue down Rachel's throat and latched onto Rachel's nipple. She circled it with her tongue and flicked it back and forth until the other girl was writhing against her and gripping the back of her head tightly.

"Tana. Bite me. Mark me."

Santana could only moan and do just that. She grazed her teeth over Rachel's nipple, and then bit down hard at the same time that she thrust her two of her fingers up and into Rachel's wetness. Rachel arched back and almost cracked her head into the wall of the shower, but neither girl seemed to notice.

"Jesus Christ, baby! God, so good. So deep. Fuck."

Santana pulled her mouth back and leaned up to kiss Rachel.

"Wrap your legs around me, baby girl. Let me take you for the ride of your life."

Rachel did just that. Santana gripped her ass tightly with one hand, used the wall for support, and started to fuck Rachel with everything she had.

"Goddamn, you are so fucking amazing, baby girl. I love to make you come undone, to feel how wet I make you, to watch your eyes roll back in your head. Do you feel how deep I am inside you? I can feel you shaking, Rach. Fuck, it makes me so fucking wet to realize that I'm the only one to do this to you. To make you fucking lose control."

Rachel opened her eyes and looked deep into Santana's eyes. "Tana?"

"Yeah,  _hermosa?_ "

"I…love when you talk…dirty to me…but I want…you…mmmm….to shut up and…come with me."

Rachel then completely surprised Santana and slid her hand down between their bodies. She rubbed her fingers furiously over Santana's clit.

Santana moaned loudly and came faster than she would have ever expected while Rachel's entire body shook. She bit down hard on Santana's shoulder as she shattered. The bite caused another – slightly less powerful but still strong – orgasm to roll through Santana's body, and Santana savored it as she kissed Rachel softly and helped the smaller girl come down from her own sexual peak. As Rachel took a deep breath and finally pulled away, Santana helped her lower her legs to the shower floor and they both chuckled.

Santana spoke first, "Well, I think we  _definitely_  got our workout in for the day."

Rachel just shook her head, and they finished their shower. Santana was in the bedroom getting dressed when she heard Rachel shout.

"Santana!"

Santana rushed into the bathroom in her jeans and a bra and immediately burst out laughing at what Rachel was pointing at. She had a  _very_ obvious hickey on her pulse point from last night (probably the one Santana had given her downstairs), and the Diva was definitely not pleased.

"Really, Tana? Was it really necessary to leave one that is almost impossible to cover up?"

"I didn't hear you complaining last night, baby girl."

Rachel huffed but conceded the point.

"Well, I suppose it's only fair since I got you back as well."

Santana turned to look in the mirror and, sure enough, there was the bite mark on her shoulder that Rachel made when she came in the shower.

Santana shrugged and said, "Yeah, I kinda like knowing you couldn't control yourself."

Rachel looked a little uncomfortable and Santana wrapped her arms around her waist and rested her chin on Rachel's shoulder, "I know that you want to save that part of yourself for private, and you know I'm not really wild about parading around my personal life, so if it makes you feel better we'll make a pact."

At Rachel's questioning look in the mirror, Santana continued, "No hickeys in visible places for clothes we wear in public from now on, okay? That way we won't have to worry about trying to cover them up for performances or anything either."

"Are you sure you'd be okay with that? I don't want you to think I'm ashamed of people knowing we have sex, Tana."

Santana kissed her cheek and squeezed her tighter once, then released her.

"I know, Rach. I'm not either. Some things should just be private if we can keep them that way. Plus this way we can find much more interesting places to leave hickeys." Santana raised her eyebrows a few times and smirked, and Rachel poked her in the stomach and laughed.

Then ended up finally making it to the Lima Bean by 12:30 p.m. and that was only by sheer will on Santana's part. Rachel had decided to reward Santana for her understanding about the hickeys by demonstrating a few of the places they  _could_  leave them. Pulling Rachel up after she left a hickey at the top of her inner thigh was one of the hardest things Santana had ever had to do. However, they did have all weekend, and Kurt would never let them live it down if they stood him up.

After they grabbed their drinks, the girls spotted Kurt and Blaine sitting in the comfy chairs in their usual corner. Kurt looked a little annoyed and was just reaching for his phone when Santana's voice stopped him.

"You don't have to try to call again, Kurt. We got the other billion messages and we're here now, so chill."

Kurt jumped up and started in almost immediately, "Santana Lopez, if making Rachel late is how you're going to influence her I—Rachel, is that a hickey?"

Blushing furiously, Rachel sat down in her chair. Blaine was smiling fondly at the two of them, and Santana just sat back to enjoy the show. Rachel saw that her girlfriend was going to let her fend for herself on this one, and Santana could tell that there would be retribution later. Oh, well, for now it was fun to watch Rachel scramble for words.

"Well, I wouldn't say that it  _wasn't_  a hickey—"

"Double-negative,  _querida_ ," Santana sing-songed in a low voice.

"Tana, you're not helping."

"I'm just saying. You're always saying it's very important to make sure that everything is grammatically correct."

"If you don't stop being an ass on purpose, I'll show you how grammatically correct I can be when I tell you you're sleeping on the couch tonight,  _sweetums_."

"'Sweetums'? Really?"

Rachel smirked.

"You started it."

Turning back to their friends, Rachel noticed Kurt and Blaine's shared looks of humor at their expense.

Rachel straightened her shoulders and decided to be direct (these were their friends after all).

"In answer to your question, Kurt, yes, this is a hickey. Sometimes those happen in the heat of the moment as I'm sure you know since you have one as well."

Kurt glanced down quickly, and when he realized there was nothing there, he looked up sheepishly and laughed along with the others at Rachel's joke.

"I suppose I deserved that. Well, anyway, how is it being back together? Did you two have a good Valentine's Day?"

"It was awesome. How about you? You boys get to have any 'fun' at all?"

Blaine blushed and Kurt looked down into his cup, and Santana raised a hand in high-five to Blaine, "Way to go, Warbler!"

"Santana, leave them alone."

"What, I can't be happy that my friends were having as much fun as we were? Well, maybe not  _as_  much fun…"

The joking and teasing went back and forth as the friends talked about their nights. Rachel noticed that Kurt turned down about five phone calls throughout the conversation, and he looked stressed enough about it that she decided she would ask him about it later.

The four of them spent almost the entire rest of the day at the coffee shop laughing and talking about what they were looking forward to about Regionals. When Sebastian showed up again, they did their best to ignore him, and Blaine got in a good jab when he asked Sebastian if the reason he was such a bastard was because he wasn't getting any. Santana had never been more proud of him, and Blaine simply maintained that it was because he spent too much time around the Latina. Santana saw no problem with that. Sebastian was an ass, and Blaine had been the most hurt by him, especially physically.

That night, Santana and Rachel lay in bed and watched  _The Philadelphia Story_. Apparently, Santana was a closeted classic movie fan. Since many classic musicals were in the form of classic films, the girls agreed to switch off between musical and non-musical black and white films. Santana was lying on her back, and Rachel had her head resting on her chest as she traced patterns with her fingers over Santana's stomach. Both girls were completely naked, and they were splayed out in a post-orgasmic stupor. Rachel couldn't help giggling as Santana quoted the lines, and the two simply enjoyed being together.

"Tana?"

"'C.K. Dexter Haven, you show unexpected depth!' Hmmm? What's up, baby girl?"

"Were you serious about wanting to go to Julliard? To sing?"

Santana glanced down at Rachel and stroked her hand through her girlfriend's hair, "Yeah, I definitely was. I mean, my grades are decent, and I know I can get good recs from Ms. Corcoran (Rachel stiffened a little) and Mr. Schue. Why?"

"I just wanted to know if you'd applied or anything. I've been working on my NYADA audition all year, and my applications went in awhile ago. I just wanted to see if you'd thought about it."

"Way ahead of you, Rach. I applied two months ago. I also applied to a lot of other schools in New York and on the East Coast."

Rachel glanced up at her and looked really surprised, "Two months ago? But we were still together then. Why didn't you tell me?"

"It was going to be a surprise. Then when we broke up, I just didn't think you'd want to hear it. Plus I won't hear anything for another month or two. So I didn't want to get either of our hopes up, you know? Plus I don't know if you've noticed, but you're really fucking distracting,  _hermosa_ , and I haven't really been able to think past being in love with you this week."

Rachel smiled and leaned up to thoroughly kiss Santana. She pulled back and smiled. "Well, I applied to a number of schools with strong musical theater programs in the New York area. So we can nervously wait together, okay?"

Santana nodded and leaned close, pulling Rachel in for another kiss. When she pulled back, with love in her eyes, she whispered, "I love you, Rachel."

"I love you, Santana."

"Now can we rewind the movie? I love this part and your yapping made us miss the entire thing."

Rachel smacked Santana's stomach, and their cuddling turned into a tickling wrestle match. Neither one cared who won (though if you asked Santana would say she won, and Rachel would just roll her eyes as she rewound the DVD).

* * *

On Monday morning, Rachel and Santana walked into school hand-in-hand. They had never been happier, and they couldn't help touching one another in some small way. They were so lost in their world in fact that when Kurt came up to them, he had to call each of their names three times before they answered.

"What?" Santana snapped, not really irritated, just distracted.

"Jeez, if I have to pry you two apart with a crowbar all the time, this is going to get really old really fast."

Blaine just chuckled and said, "Come on, Kurt, they're cute!"

"I am hot, not cute, thank you very much," Santana said. "However, she's cute," Santana pointed to Rachel, "So you can call her that."

"Ha, ha. Thanks. Did you want something specific, Kurt?" Rachel asked.

"Well, I just wanted to get your advice on something. I told Blaine and he isn't mad at me. We're just trying to figure out what to do about it."

Kurt explained that on Friday at the Valentine's Day party, he'd found out that Dave Karofsky was the one who had been sending Kurt love notes, and that he had admitted to being in love with Kurt. Kurt turned him down as politely as possible, though some stupid jocks from his school made him run out of there in fear before they could talk further. Kurt spent the weekend ignoring multiple phone calls from Karofsky until he had finally gotten the courage to tell Blaine about it. Now, the calls were coming every five minutes or so and Kurt didn't know what to do.

"Well, Karofsky is way in the closet. I think you need to talk to him." This came from Santana.

At Kurt's look of surprise, Santana went on, "I've been where he is mentally and it is not a pretty place. You want to be who you are, but you don't want to get hurt. Then you tell someone you like them and they don't like you back? That is the worst. It makes you feel completely helpless and alone. Talk to him. Let him know you're there for him even if you can't be there romantically. I'll speak to him too if you want. We did 'date' for a little while after all."

"Thanks, Santana. I really needed to hear that. I'll go give him a call back now and see if we can meet for coffee or something after school. I'll ask if it's okay if Blaine and you two join, but if not I'll go myself and start the conversation." Kurt went off to make the call and Blaine thanked Santana.

"He's been really nervous about what to do since he was so terrified of Karofsky for so long."

"Yeah, I get that. I'm glad he wants to try to help him still, though. We all know it's hard taking those first steps out of the closet."

Santana smiled as Rachel took her hand, "I'm proud of you, Tana. That was really sweet."

"Well, what can I say? I'm only this sweet around you, baby girl."

Blaine was smiling with the girls when Kurt joined them once more. Glancing up, they all realized immediately that something was wrong.

"Kurt? What's wrong?"

Kurt was shaking, "I called. His dad picked up."

Rachel reached out and took Kurt's hand, "What did he say, Kurt?"

"Karofsky tried to commit suicide this morning."

* * *

Additional note: Hey, all. I'm sorry to end on such a sad note. During the show, I had to leave the room for that beginning scene where Karofsky's father found him. The next chapter will probably have some upsetting scenes, but it is vital to tell this side of the story of GLBT youth. I hope you stick with me and keep all those who feel there is no other way out in your thoughts and in your hearts. Please review.


	12. The Boy with The Second Chance

Disclaimer: Want to hear something totally shocking?! I don't own anything of or profit from any part of  _Glee_. That's all Ryan Murphy and his merry band of henchmen as well as Fox.

WARNING: There are mentions of attempted teen suicide (obviously) on more than one occasion in this chapter. If this is a trigger for you, please be aware. I tried to handle it with as much care as possible.

I hope that this lives up to your expectations and remember: if you know anyone who is struggling with their identity in this way, please just reach out and let them know it is okay to be who they are. Please review. You inspire and encourage me all.

* * *

Chapter 12: "The Boy with the Second Chance"

Santana hated hospitals. In fact, to use a Rachel word, she  _loathed_  them. She'd disliked them before her potential cancer scare, but ever since then she absolutely despised them. I mean, sure, her tits looked even more awesome now, but the fact that she had to fear that she was going to die for all of ten seconds to get them? So not worth it.

All of this ran through her head as she walked through the halls of the hospital, Rachel's hand was holding hers in a death grip. Did it hurt? Yes. Was she going to tell her girlfriend to let go? Not on her life. As much as Rachel needed to hold onto her, Santana needed that right back, and they both knew it without needing it to be said.

Kurt and Blaine were walking silently beside them. All four of them hadn't said a word since they had called their parents and asked for permission to leave school early to go visit Karofsky in the hospital. They'd been released without question and now as they approached the desk, no one really knew what to say.

"May I help you?"

Rachel glanced at the others and realized she was going to have to be the one to speak up.

"Yes, please. We would like to see David Karofsky."

"Are you family?"

"Well, no, but we are some of his classmates and—"

"I'm sorry, only family members are allowed inside."

At that moment, Karofsky's father turned and stepped out of a room down the hall and saw the four of them.

"Nurse, is there a problem here?"

"No, Mr. Karofsky, I was just explaining to these kids that only family was allowed—"

"There must be some mistake. These kids are my son's cousins. Can't you tell? They have my permission to see my son, and I will be responsible for them."

The nurse nodded and the four of them slipped past. As Kurt slid by, Mr. Karofsky placed a hand on his shoulder and whispered, "Thank you, son."

He just nodded shakily and they made their way to the room at the end of the hall.

Rachel knocked. When they heard Karofsky say, "Yeah?", they went inside. He was lying down in bed and his throat looked like it had seen better days. When he saw all four of them, he looked like he was going to throw up. He sat up straighter and got out, "Come to finish the job?"

Kurt looked stricken and Blaine held his hand tightly, while Santana was ready to hold Rachel if she looked like she was going to cry. She was really tempted to snap at the teen. However, Rachel walked right up to his bed and shocked them all.

"David, I understand that you are hurting physically and emotionally right now, but we are three people who understand what you're going through more than anyone else right now in Lima, Ohio. So you better start treating us with some respect. We will not be stepped on out of some misguided attempt to stop hating yourself. You are a beautiful, wonderful person inside and out. Just because you like men and other people may hate you for that does not mean that you need to hate yourself. You are not alone. You have your father and you have us. You. Are. Not. Alone."

Karofsky looked like he was going to start crying and he was shaking his head furiously. Realizing that the intensity in the room was a little too much too fast, Rachel glanced around and said, "Kurt, you really should talk to them about getting this room glitzed up a little. It's so drab."

At Karofsky's slightly intrigued look, which he quickly shifted to horrified, Santana added "Nah, you gotta add some school colors. Get some red going on in here. Maybe cover the walls in some Victoria's Secret posters."

Rachel rolled her eyes, "We're trying to decorate for David, Tana, not  _you_."

Kurt laughed, "Oh, please, to decorate for Santana's room, you'd have to add about a billion cutesy pictures of Rachel…"

Blaine added, "I think you're forgetting that at least half of those photos would have to be sexual or dirty in some way…"

Rachel lunged for Santana as the Latina raced around the hospital room trying to get away from her seething girlfriend, " _Santana!"_

" _Hermosa_ , they're kidding! You know they are! I would never!" When her shorter girlfriend actually seemed to be calming down, Santana added, "Actually put those pictures up for others to  _see_. _"_ At Rachel's scandalized face, Santana laughed heartily and caught Rachel around the waist and wrapped her up in her arms. She kissed the top of her head and tucked her under her chin, holding her close as they turned back to Karofsky.

Dave – it felt more comfortable to call him that in their minds now – was looking at them all like they were crazy, but he seemed to have the beginnings of a smile on his face. (Something to note though: only Rachel would ever call him David, just as she was the only one to ever called Puck "Noah".)

"What's going on with all of you? 'Cause I kinda feel like I walked into the twilight zone, or I really did die or something."

That sobered everyone up a little, but Kurt decided to explain.

"So let's see, since you've been gone from McKinley: Rachel slapped Finn after Nationals last year – offstage, thank God – after he kissed her onstage and made us lose. Then she got together with Rachel over the summer in some sort of lesbian way that I don't really want to think about. They both came out together after Finn tried – yet again, the doofus – to get back together with Rachel, and it was all really rather romantic. Santana admitted her undying love for Rachel, and I know they had hot sex of some kind that night, because, come on, who wouldn't give it up for that kind of romantic declaration—"

Blaine had been nodding along in agreement with a smirk on his face to his boyfriend's retelling of the tale. Rachel was shaking her head in resignation, and by the end Santana was smiling in full-on pride at the statement of her sexual prowess. Dave just looked really confused.

Finally, when it looked like Rachel was going to blow a gasket at Kurt's version of their love lives, Santana took over.

"Thanks for that, um, colorful version of the story, Kurt. I'm sure I could have provided some really great descriptions of that hot sex, but I think I'll stop you before Rach here kills us all. Dave, the main point of all of us showing up here is that we want to try to be your friends. I know Kurt here wants to meet with you alone after this to talk with you one-on-one about your more personal stuff, and we all get that, we do, but suicide? Suicide is never the answer. Kurt shouldn't have ignored your calls, but he didn't know you were calling about something bigger. There should always be a backup system in place in case something like what happened with that football jackass happens and you need to talk, you know?"

Dave nodded, but remained silent. Blaine took over.

"Dave, your father talked to us on the phone and he's going to make sure you talk to a therapist about this, obviously, but we also reassured him that we would be there to talk to you about this as well. We've gone through this kind of thing as well as you know," Dave flinched and Kurt looked a little hurt, but Blaine went on. "And we've gotten through it together. You can too one day at a time."

"We also think that, once you're healthy," Rachel continued, "You should transfer back to McKinley. We know that it is the middle of your senior year, but you're pretty caught up in your classes from what your dad says, and you know McKinley really well, and we can help you with the rest. We've also spoken to Mr. Schue and you are welcome to join Glee, even if it is just to sit and watch and see what it is like to be a part of the group on a daily basis, okay?"

Again, Dave nodded. He was too choked up to find his voice.

Santana nodded and took Rachel's hand.

"All right. Rach and I are going to check out for now and let you and Kurt and Blaine chat, okay? Then you can get some rest. We'll drop by tomorrow to check in."

"Rest up, David, and I'll make sure to bring in some Barbra for you to listen to tomorrow."

Santana rolled her eyes, but Dave smiled, and as they turned to leave he called out. They turned back and he whispered, "Thanks. For everything. I don't deserve it."

Rachel smiled and said, "You do deserve it, David. We just have to help you realize that."

With that, Rachel and Santana closed the hospital door to the sight of Kurt and Blaine pulling their chairs closer to Dave's bedside. Dave's face looked like he was facing a firing squad, and Santana couldn't blame him. She'd pay good money to be a fly on the wall for that convo, but she'd pay twice as much to  _not_  be on Dave's end.

* * *

Santana could tell that Rachel was trying to put on a good front, but the fact was that the day was taking its toll on both of them. To try to give them a pick-me-up, she had them stop by the Lima Bean on their way back to Rachel's house to get some caffeine. Santana put the car in park and Rachel made to get out of the car. Santana grabbed her hand and pulled her back in. Rachel was surprised by a sweet kiss on the lips and Santana's thumb running across the back of her hand.

"Thanks,  _hermosa_. I needed that."

Rachel smile was a little subdued, but she said, "You're welcome."

"All right, enough of this mushy crap. I wants my caffeine, bitches!"

"You know, technically, there are only two of us in the car. So you're calling yourself a bitch, baby."

"Rachel, I carry razorblades in my hair. I've been a self-proclaimed bitch for years."

"Tana, seeing as I have run my hands through your hair numerous times and never once gotten so much as a papercut, I know for a fact that the razorblade rumor is just that, a rumor. I'll admit, your personality is initially a little…rough around the edges, but I do have a thing for girls who are rough…"

Santana laughed and opened the door for Rachel. She followed the shorter singer inside while just barely resisting the urge to smack her delectable ass. She really loved her girlfriend's short skirts. Though she also wore a tight pair of jeans really well…

They turned to leave and their bad day got drastically worse. There, right behind them, was Sebastian.

"What the fuck do you want,  _puta_?"

"Sebastian, this is really not the day for this."

"I simply wanted to ask how Dave Karofsky is."

Santana sneered, "Like you actually care."

Sebastian started to say something and then continued, "I do care, Santana. Whether or not you believe me, I would never wish the torment he is going through on anyone. He asked me for some advice the other day and I—"

"Oh, I get it. You're feeling really fucking guilty so you're trying to fix it all by saying sorry and checking on him, is that it? Well, it doesn't work like that, dipshit. It's not that easy!"

"Santana!" Rachel looks really shocked and very worried.

"You think you can just say you're sorry, and it makes the insults and the hurt and the pain you caused disappear? You think it makes the years before go away? You think everyone just forgets? You think he can ever just  _forget?!_   _No_ _se olvide_ _intimidación!_ "

Santana was full-on shouting now, and she shoved Sebastian across the coffee shop. It was a very good thing Rachel had their hot drinks in her hands. Loudly, she called out to Santana, "Santana Marie Lopez!"

The other girl froze.

"Outside now, please, before the cops are called on you."

Santana looked around and realized that everyone was staring at them. She shook her head furiously headed towards the door. Rachel turned to Sebastian and said, "I'm sorry. I think that was more about her than you. It's been a really long day. I'm sure David would appreciate a phone call from you. If you call the hospital and ask for his room, they can transfer you. We can't look to the past. All we can do is face the future, Sebastian."

With that, she raced outside (as fast as possible with two hot drinks in her hands) and found Santana sitting in the passenger seat of her car. Rachel drove them in silence to the park near her house and parked the car once more. She walked around, opened the door, and pulled Santana out of the car by her hands. She took her over to the swings and they sat down.

"'You don't forget bullying,' huh?" Rachel repeated it back to Santana in English and took her hand, which was shaking.

"I guess this day hit me a lot harder than I thought."

"Tana,  _querida_ , I thought we were past this."

"We are!"

"So why do I feel like David trying to kill himself has brought it all back up again?"

Santana stood up. She couldn't sit anymore. She was too jittery.

"Dave was bullied for one day, Rach. One  _day_! I'm not trying to say he was weak and it was for different reasons, but you were bullied for  _years_! Did you…ever…"

Rachel was rocking back and forth on the swing and she glanced up at Santana.

"Yes."

Santana froze. Everything in her world stopped. She felt like she was never going to be able to move again.

"I was 14. It was the summer right before sophomore year, and I had been picked on and bullied for an entire year. I didn't have any friends. I felt like I would never have anything but success in my career. I was even at a point where I thought I might not even get that. There was no strong theater or Glee club at McKinley yet, you remember. One day, my dads were both out at work and I went upstairs to find something to help make all the pain go away. I couldn't find any razors that would work. My dads didn't have any besides electric, and I'm afraid of blood so I grabbed all the pills I could. I took them all, but by some miracle they just made me sick and I spent the whole day throwing up. My daddy found me over the toilet, took me to the hospital, and we all spent much of the summer in a therapist's office."

Santana didn't know what to say.  _My girlfriend tried to kill herself. My girlfriend tried to kill herself because I bullied her. I almost killed my girlfriend._

"Santana. Stop it. Right now. I mean it."

"What?"

"Blaming yourself."

"Rachel, I was one of the people who tormented you every day until you wanted to take those pills. How is that not my fault?"

"No, 14-year-old Santana did that. 14-year-old Santana was just as scared of her own identity. 14-year-old Santana probably had moments alone in her bedroom wondering what she should do about the fact that she loved her best friend who was a girl instead of a nice boy like she should. Right? A 14-year-old who thought she was going to hell and almost destroyed every friendship she had because of the fear she had of being herself? You were just as tormented as I was, Santana. Does it make bullying right? No. But we found the good things inside one another, and we found friendship and love. We worked to end practically all bullying at McKinley High and that's a really great thing, Santana. That's what we should focus on. That's something to be proud of."

"I know, I know it is, but—"

Rachel stood up and placed her finger over Santana's lips, "No buts. The past is the past. I'm not saying it wasn't a really dark time in my life, Santana. However, with my therapist's help, I was able to get out of the hole. Then it was sophomore year. I had New Directions, and Quinn got pregnant and joined, and then you and Brittany became a part of Glee as well. You all began to change – despite your best efforts to thwart the team – and the bullying pretty much stopped, minus those goddamned hockey player ass-hats, but that's another story altogether."

"Who really thinks they look good in a mullet anyway? Even in the '80s it was not a cool look. Idiots."

Rachel shook her head at Santana's attempt at levity. "We have to move on from our pasts, love. They've shaped who we are, but they aren't all that we are. We've learned from them and now we can use them to help others like David and Sebastian."

Santana rolled her eyes, but kissed the finger against her lips, "Why do we have to help Sebastian?"

"Because I think he and David would make a cute couple."

"Okay, now I  _know_  you're crazy."

They headed back to the car, but as they walked Santana grabbed Rachel and pulled her whole body into hers so that they were almost one person.

"I know I've said it before, but I am so sorry for the slushies and the bullying, baby. To think that I could've lost you before I even knew you—" she took a deep breath.

"I'm glad I got to know you, Rachel Berry, and I love you more than I ever thought was possible. Thank you for loving me back."

Rachel could only nod and pull Santana into a deep kiss, one that they didn't come up for air from for quite some time.

* * *

Regionals snuck up on Santana and Rachel, and before they knew it they were backstage waiting to perform. Thankfully as Rachel would put it, they were both "exceptionally well-rehearsed and amazing performers," and it also helped that they practiced every day with Blaine and Kurt in Dave's hospital room. They thought they might be told to quiet down after the first practice. But apparently the other patients found the musical numbers soothing and uplifting, and they would often come by to make requests.

Sebastian came by to visit often, and most times the four of them would go to the cafeteria and give them time alone since Santana and Kurt were still not his biggest fans. However, Rachel was still trying to play matchmaker, and Blaine was happy to help as long as it meant Sebastian would stop flirting with him. A slightly selfish added benefit was that Dave might stop having a crush on Kurt. Santana and Kurt were staying out of the way on that matter since Team Raine was a force to be reckoned with.

The Warblers performed first. Their versions of  _Stand_  and  _Glad You Came_  in honor of Dave and others like him were really beautiful. What got Rachel squealing to the point where Santana had to cover her mouth so she couldn't be heard over their song was that he definitely winked at Dave, who was in the audience for the performance, and Dave definitely blushed. Santana chuckled a little herself at the obvious flirting going on between the two. It might take some time, especially emotionally on Dave's part, but those boys were  _totes_  into each other.

There was a nicely performed choral piece by that other group Santana didn't care about, but it was kinda boring and at this point she was too nervous to care. Then it was time.

As if there had ever been any question: New Directions won Regionals, of course, with their epic three-song setlist. However, their entire performance was the most amazing part.  _Fly/I Believe I Can Fly_  went off without a hitch, and Santana killed the rap parts. She was also really stellar in their version of  _Stronger (What Doesn't Kill You)_ , as were all the women, but Jesus if Rachel didn't blow it away during their performance of  _Here's to Us_. They couldn't sing all the original lyrics, since profanity was stupidly not allowed, but in her own head (and in the head of every teen who'd experienced the last few days) she was hearing the original lyrics:

Here's to us

Here's to love

All the times

That we messed up

Here's to you

Fill the glass

'Cause the last few nights

Have kicked my ass

If they give you hell

Tell 'em to go fuck themselves

Here's to us

Here's to us

Here's to love

Here's to us (Wish everybody well)

Here's to us

Here's to love

Here's to us

Rachel sang her heart out, and every teen silently did the same right along with her. She sang in happiness, and she sang in sadness. She sang for every kid who'd ever been bullied and every bully who'd never known better. She sang for the boy who thought that bullying was the only way and that suicide was the only way out. She sang for David Karofsky: the boy with the second chance.


	13. The Boy Who Was My First Love?

Disclaimer:  _Glee_ is not owned in any part by me. I just have fun with it.

Author's Note: This chapter should be a bit of fun. Please let me know what you all think!

* * *

Chapter 13: "The Boy Who Was My First Love?"

The Regionals win was amazing, but everyone agreed that this didn't mean that they could slack off like they had last year. They practiced harder and harder for hours on end, which sometimes meant that the other students looked at them even more oddly than the rest of the time. Songs that used to be practiced in their heads while walking down the halls were now performed out loud, and the slushies were definitely getting more frequent (though damn if it wasn't really great practice on Santana's reflexes).

Normally, all of this practice would drive Santana up the wall. However, Rachel had come up with a new reward system that  _definitely_  made practicing worth it in Santana's mind.

"Mmm,  _Dios, mio,_ Rachel! Aren't we supposed to practice  _before_  the reward?"

"Who says?" Rachel mumbled as she nibbled up Santana's neck and pushed Santana harder against her bedroom door. Rachel's hands had already drifted under Santana's Cheerios top and her blunt nails were lightly scraping over her stomach, just the way the taller brunette loved.

"Fuck. Umm, pretty sure you did a few days ago."

"Well, I was obviously deranged. Besides, we had Glee practice earlier, and then I had to watch you do those goddamn splits…"

Santana chuckled, then spun Rachel around and scooped her up under her knees and tossed her onto her bed, which caused Rachel to shriek. Then she pounced on her and kissed her deeply. Rachel moaned in the back of her throat.

"Please,  _hermosa_ , have you seen how flexible you are?" Santana laughed harder when Rachel wrapped her thighs tightly around her waist and pulled the Latina forcefully down into her. This time they both moaned.

Santana had Rachel's shirt off and inched her hand down her girlfriend's stomach when the four most terrifying words they could have thought of at that moment were spoken into the room:

"Stop, or we shoot."

Both girls froze and stared at the door to Rachel's bedroom. Thankfully, neither Hiram nor Leroy Berry was actually holding a gun, but still, Rachel's fathers were standing in the doorway.

"Dad! Daddy!" Santana grabbed Rachel's shirt for her off the floor and sat in front of her so she had time to cover up.

"Misters Berry, I can explain…"

Leroy spoke up, "Santana, we love you. We think Rachel could not have found someone more perfect to be with. We know that you two love each other very much. However, that does not mean that rules go out the window. We want you two to come downstairs, and we'll go over what those rules are and that they need to be followed. Is that understood?"

* * *

Puck could not stop laughing. Finally, Santana had to smack him. When that didn't work, Rachel brought out the big guns.

"Noah, if you don't stop laughing this instant I'll tell your mother that you really aren't busy with Glee practice on Saturdays, and then you really will have to go to  _Shabbat_  services every weekend."

That shut him up instantly.

Santana just smirked and said, "Wow, babe, I'm glad you're on my side."

Quinn shook her head and leaned forward and asked, "So what happened after that?"

Santana shivered in not entirely mock horror, "We had to sit on the couch in front of both of them and get a two-hour lecture on safe sex and the rules of the house: 'No being in Rachel's room with the door closed, no locking Rachel's door, no sleepovers, no sex…blah blah blah.'"

Rachel laughed at Santana's forlorn look and rubbed her girlfriend's back. "My fathers did say that they knew that sex would almost definitely be occurring no matter what rules they put into effect. They just want to make sure we are careful wherever we do choose to have it, and that we don't make a mockery of their rules."

Everyone looked to Santana for translation. "If we have sex, just don't let them know about it."

"Sweet, man! So who wants to come to a party at my house this weekend?" Puck asked.

Everyone started agreeing at once, and Rachel laughed and rested her head on Santana's shoulder. That was when she noticed a familiar-looking figure standing across the courtyard.

"Is that David?"

Kurt and Blaine both turned when they heard Rachel's question, and Santana looked up as well. This caused everyone to turn and look as well. Sure enough, there was David Karofsky.

Rachel stood up and the other three of their group followed her. Dave definitely looked really uncomfortable. But when he saw Rachel wave enthusiastically, he waved back hesitantly.

"David! What are you doing here?"

"My doctors and dad agreed that it wasn't safe for me to be at my other school anymore. We thought it would be the best idea for me to come back to McKinley. Kurt, Blaine, I hope that that's okay-"

Both boys quickly nodded and Kurt took Dave's hand, "Dave, I thought we went over this in the hospital. We're okay, really. Now come on, let's go sit down."

Santana shrugged her shoulders, "Yeah, Dave. Come join our island. We're kind of like misfit toys or some shit, but we're pretty awesome."

The five of them walked back to the tables, and Dave sat down with their group. When the awkward pause seemed like it was going to just keep going, Brittany spoke up. "Puck, how come you never invite Lord Tubbington to your parties? You know, he's an excellent dancer. I taught him everything I know. I'm sure Dave would be very impressed by his moves when he comes to the party this weekend."

Just like that, the tension was broken. Everyone burst out laughing, the pain of the past was forgotten for now, and Brittany had invited Dave into their larger group with one simple statement.

* * *

The week went by pretty quickly, and Friday night was something everyone was looking forward to.

Santana and Rachel decided to get ready at Santana's house since her parents were away for the weekend.  _That_ had been a fun conversation with both of their parents – especially so soon after "The Talk" with Rachel's dads.

" _Mami,_ the party is at Puck's place. There's no point to driving Rachel back to her house when we can just walk down the block back to our house!"

Her dad laughed from his position on the couch across the room, "You mean you'll both be so drunk that it would be safer for you to simply walk down the street?  _S_ _i?_ "

Santana turned away from her mother glaring at her in the kitchen entryway and tried to gauge the best way to answer that question.

Before she could come up with an answer, her mother threw a dishtowel at the back of Santana's head. "Oh, calm down,  _mija_. We know what happens at these parties. We'll talk to Rachel's parents, but I want a clear understanding here: there will be no breaking of the rules you agreed to the other day. Our house rules stand as well, Santana. You go to a party together, you leave together, and you stay safe. Do not drink irresponsibly."

Santana nodded, and her father added, "Remember to watch for alcohol poisoning in yourself and your friends as well, Santana. Parties are fun, but they can be dangerous. Call 911 if you need to, okay?"

"I know,  _Papi_. Thanks for trusting me, both of you."

"Yeah, yeah. I suppose we have to, otherwise how would a nice girl like Rachel have chosen you, eh?"

Santana lunged at her father. He laughed and tried to dodge her as her mother warned them not to break anything.

Santana shook the memory out of her head as the doorbell rang.

"Tana, can you get that, baby?"

"I gots it!"

Santana opened the door to Kurt and Blaine with a rather awkward-looking Dave standing behind them.

"Why if it isn't the bitchier half of Pezberry!"

"If it isn't the gayer half of Klaine!"

Blaine just shook his head at Santana and Kurt's usual antics. When he saw Dave's confused look, he leaned over and said, "It's okay. You'd think with the way they rag on each other that they're huge enemies, but you quickly figure out that the best way to show Santana love is to give back as much as she does."

Santana chose this moment to shout out, "Warbles! My man! What, you went sans bowtie tonight? How will the universe stay together?"

"I don't know, Santana, but 'sans', really? I think someone's been spending  _way_  too much time around Rachel Berry. Careful, someone might think you come from the nice part of town."

"Yeah, using words like 'sans,' or, you know, living in a huge-ass house like this. One of those  _might_  imply a little less 'Lima Heights Adjacent' than you would like."

All three of them turned to Dave who had added that last comment to their repartee. When he shrugged and muttered, "I'm just sayin'," they all burst out laughing, and Santana slapped Dave on the back.

"Dave, I think you're gonna fit right in. Come on, let's head inside and see if 'My Fair Lady' is ready yet."

"I'll have you know, Santana, that I am so ready that I even have my coat on. However, I do appreciate the musical reference – though I know you were aware I was standing here."

Santana smirked and swept Rachel under her arm and kissed her on the lips "borrowing" some of her cherry ChapStick. The shorter girl pulled back and groaned, "Tana! If you want some ChapStick, just ask me for some."

"But it's so much more fun to get it this way, babe."

"All right, you two, break it up. Otherwise, Kurt and I will feel like we have to compete and then Dave will just feel awkward. Plus, you know Brittany will never forgive any of us if we miss the party."

"I thought this was Puck's party?" Dave asked.

Santana laughed, "Oh, it is, but Brittany is always in charge of making sure everyone is there. Don't you remember when you used to go to his parties before? How Britt always seemed to be in every room all the time? That was her checking to make sure everyone was there. If she didn't see someone, then she'd call them incessantly until they got their ass there."

Rachel said, "Speaking of, we are now running late – and yes, Santana, I know part of it is my fault because I couldn't find the perfect outfit to wear – but now we should all start walking down the street. Do we all remember the rule for tonight?"

"Come together, leave together," they all intoned.

Santana pointed down the hall, "Kurt, Blaine, put your bags down the hall in the guest bedroom. Rule is: no sex in Rachel's bedroom, so in my mind that means have at it."

" _Santana!_ "

"What? Rachel, baby. Our parents knew we would follow their rules as much as we need to in order to be safe, but they're not stupid. Why do you think they agreed to let us stay here together at all, in a group? I'm pretty damn sure they're hoping that with our friends here we'll all be less inclined to fuck like rabbits."

"Well, I know  _I_  won't be having sex tonight…"

"That's what you think, Davey-boy. We are totally on a mission to get you some."

"Santana! Dave, she's kidding. Stop looking like you're going to pass out. Tana, stop being a jerk. Kurt, Blaine, please go put your stuff away. Dave, I assume you're okay with the pull-out here in the living room?" With only a few more shoves and jokes back and forth, they all made it out of Santana's house and down to Puck's in the chill April air.

At Puck's, the party was already raging. All the Glee kids were invited, as were any of the football players who'd agreed to not be douche bags, and some friends of friends. Of course, most of them had already begun drinking before the group arrived.

"Jewbro! Lezbro! The whole gang's here!" Puck shouted when he answered the door.

"Puck, rockin' party. Anyone still sober?" Santana asked.

"Hmmm. Nope, don't think so."

Rachel just shook her head, "As lovely as that thought is, Noah, would you happen to have a place we could put our coats?"

"Sure, you can put them right in the—" Puck seemed to choke, and Santana smacked him on the back to make sure he was okay. However, when Kurt, Blaine, and Dave also seemed to be staring, Santana turned around to ask Rachel what the problem was. Then she figured it out  _right_  quick.

When they'd left the house, Rachel had been so ready to go that she had even had her coat on. Santana was too busy getting pushed out of the house and yelled at by her girlfriend that she forgot that she'd never actually  _seen_  what Rachel chose to wear. While Santana was wearing a short black dress with short boots, that was expected, and Rachel had dressed up for Santana before, but this? Rachel was wearing a really tight pair of nice jeans (which were somehow making her legs look even longer) and a pair of strappy heels, as well as a black corset-type cinched top that was doing  _wonders_  for her cleavage.

"What? What's everyone staring at? Tana? Did I make a fashion mistake again? Damn it, okay, I should just turn around right now and leave because—"

"NO!"

Rachel froze when all five of them shouted at her. Santana cleared her throat, "Rach, baby, you look drop dead gorgeous in that outfit. Don't even think of leaving."

"Yeah, Rachel, you look fucking  _fine_!"

"Puck, remove your eyes from my girlfriend's ass, or I'll remove your eyes from your head."

"Come on, Tana. Let's grab our group, grab a drink, and dance!" Rachel took Santana's hand and pulled her into the kitchen and away from her thoughts of trying to kill Puck…or now.

They found Brittany and the rest of the Glee club out of the dance floor and – after the initial hooting and hollering at Rachel's outfit (for which she blushed and Santana laughed) – they all danced for the next hour or so.

"You having fun, baby?" Santana asked as she walked up behind Rachel and handed her some water to drink during a dance break.

"Yeah, this is my first real dance party besides the 'epic fail' that was the one in my basement last year." Rachel seemed to be entranced by the dancing that Brittany and Mike were doing on the dance floor currently, even though she was still talking to Santana.

Santana laughed. "The way you're staring at her right now, babe, you'd think you were the one with a thing for Brittany. Or is it Mike I should be worried about?"

"What? No! No, I just wish I could dance like that. They're just so effortless and…sexual."

"We can dance like that. It's not like we're not out or at a party where people know us."

Rachel looked back at Santana in shock. "Santana, I could never! I dance well, but that kind of passion…it would take years of dance training."

Santana laughed again. "Well, we'll never be as amazing as the two of them, no. But we do have the passion down, and baby, that makes up for a lot. Come on. Let me at least show you what it's like to be led on the dance floor by another woman, hmm?"

With that, Santana pulled Rachel onto the dance floor just as  _The Way You Make Me Feel_  by Michael Jackson came on (this was, after all, a part Glee club party).

To say that the two of them made it look as effortless as Brittany and Mike did would be a lie. There were a couple of times where you could tell Rachel was nervous, but Santana was a strong lead, and they quickly found their groove. They also quickly drew a crowd because the sexual energy coming off of them could have powered all of Ohio. The way Santana fit her thigh in between Rachel's when they were facing one another, the heat coming off of them in waves when Rachel ground her ass into Santana's pelvis when she danced in front of her – no one watching was in any way unaffected, least of all the two girls who danced together and only had eyes for one another.

When the music ended and moved into another song, there was loud applause. As their breath mingled, both Rachel and Santana looked up and around, noticed the crowd, and burst out laughing.

"Yeah, yeah. Thanks very much. Show's over everyone. We'll try to sell tickets next time," Santana shouted above the applause.

As Puck walked by, Rachel nodded to Santana subtly and the Latina snagged his arm. "Hey, Puckster, hold a sec. I need your help with something."

"Wassup?"

"I need your help finding your bedroom."

"My bedroom? It's upstairs, you know that. You've been up there before for a number of reasons, and really? Your house is right down the street. Why do you need to use my bedroom to have sex with Rachel?" Puck complained – albeit somewhat drunkenly.

Rachel spoke up, wrapped her arm around Santana's waist, and used the other hand to rest against Puck's chest, "Well, Noah, we  _really_  think  _you_  might like showing us your room.  _Personally_."

It took a minute, but he finally seemed to get it when he proceeded to grab Santana and Rachel's hands and take the stairs two at a time. Any faster and both girls probably would have tripped at least a couple of times on the way. They were definitely surprised that Puck didn't trip at all, considering the alcohol he'd had so far.

"So, ladies, how're we going to do this?"

Rachel took the lead. "Well, Noah, I want you to sit down in that chair by the door and enjoy yourself for a few minutes, okay?"

Puck nodded as Rachel walked him backwards with a hand on his chest until he sort of fell into the chair. He looked like he was on cloud nine.

Rachel turned around and sauntered back to Santana and walked  _her_  back with her hand on her chest until she fell onto Puck's bed.

"And what'd you want me to do,  _hermosa?_ " Santana whispered as Rachel climbed onto her lap.

"You,  _querida?_  I want you to kiss me and don't stop until I tell you to.  _Comprende?_ "

Santana chuckled and swept Rachel's hair back over her shoulder, then pulled her as close as they could possibly get and followed her "orders" to the letter.

Puck could not believe his luck. Here were the two hottest girls in school (who were now both off limits), and he was gonna get to bang them both! Awesome!

After a while, Rachel pulled back and realized that somehow Santana had managed to get her corset top undone while they were making out.

She gave Santana a "look." The other girl just gave her a sheepish look back that said, "What? I couldn't help it!"

Rachel climbed off Santana, her shirt still undone, revealing her black lacy bra underneath. Puck was practically drooling at this point.

"Noah? I'm going to need you to stand up for me, sweetie."

He did, and Rachel slowly took his shirt off making sure to run her breasts along his naked chest. She then unbuckled his pants and let them drop to the floor. When he was down to his boxers, she pulled him forward and pulled him into a kiss.

Rachel pulled back and whispered, "Noah?"

Puck was rock hard, and her whispering was killing him. All he could get out was a choked, "Hmmm?"

"The next time you forget to let me know that you  _didn't_  sleep with my girlfriend in a night of drunken depression on her part, remember this moment."

With that, Rachel shoved Puck out his bedroom door (where she had maneuvered him while undressing and kissing him) with a raging boner and in nothing but his boxers.

"Wha—RACHEL! What the  _hell_ are you doing! Open the fucking door right now!"

"I don't think so, Noah! You fucked with the wrong girl."

"Santana! Santana, you can't let her do this to me. I was there for you. I didn't tell her because she wasn't talking to anyone. Rachel, I tried! I tried to tell you."

"Oh, calm down, Puck. You'll just draw a crowd. We know it's not your fault. Rach had to trust me, and I had to tell her I love her and all that other crap. So it's really not all your fault."

Rachel added, "However, you still didn't help the situation with your damn alcohol, and tonight is no exception. So I want a promise, Noah Puckerman."

They were definitely drawing attention now as people started to make their way towards the stairs and the shouting.

"What?" Puck shouted through the door.

"Joke flirting is fine, but get this though your head: there will be no sex for you with Santana or me, is that understood? Promise me it won't even cross your mind. And before you say it, no, you can't even keep it for your 'spank bank.'"

Puck nodded furiously and said out loud, "Fine, yes, I agree. Now let me in for my goddamn pants!"

Puck tumbled in just in time as a couple of brave partiers made it to the top of the stairs. Santana and Rachel couldn't stop laughing as Puck pulled his pants on and grumbled the whole time.

"You've taught her some evil things, Lopez."

Santana scoffed, "Oh, no, that was all her idea, Puck. My girl is devious all on her own. Isn't she fabulous?"

Rachel laughed, "Although originally the plan did not involve my shirt actually being undone…"

Santana shrugged, "What can I say? My hands, they have a mind of their own."

Just as Puck was reaching for his shirt on the floor and Rachel was just about to start buttoning up her shirt (since Santana had jokingly been trying to get her to leave it undone for a little longer), they heard shouting and the door to Puck's bedroom was shoved open.

"What the fuck's this shit?!" Finn slurred, as he swayed in the doorway.

"Finn? Dude, what the hell are you doing here?" Puck reached for him. When Finn jerked him off his arm, he realized  _very_ quickly that Finn was not sober at all.

"Man, you're really drunk. Let's go downstairs and you can sleep it off, okay?"

"No! I wanna know what the fuck you were doing in here with your fucking shirt off and why Rachel had her bra showing! What the hell are you doing? Are you sleeping with my girlfriend again?" Finn was swaying back and forth and gesturing wildly.

Santana led Rachel towards the door after making sure her shirt was done up fully, and they both kept an eye on Finn as Puck purposefully led him further into the room so that they could get out. However, once they made their way downstairs, Finn realized what had happened.

"Rachel! Rachel! I wanna talk to you!"

"Go away, Finn. We've already talked about this, and I'm not going to speak to you when you're not sober."

"Rachel, first you say you're leaving me for that slut. Now you're fucking around with  _Puck_?"

With a few gasps and some laughter around them, Santana spoke up.

"Oh, please, let's start that rumor, Finn. God."

"You're speaking for her now, cu—?"

"Finn, don't even  _think_  of calling her that name, or you will see how much of a bitch I can really be. No, she doesn't speak for me. Not that it's any of your business, but we were playing a prank on Noah, which is why were up in his room. So, no, I am not fucking Noah. Now, can you please get out of our way?"

Rachel stepped around Finn and two things happened at once: Finn went to grab her and the sound of a punch resounded across the room.

Finn flinched, but everyone turned to see that a guy with football player physique who no one appeared to recognize was lying on the floor, and Sebastian was standing over him with Dave standing behind Sebastian in shock.

Santana walked over quickly along with Rachel, Kurt, and Blaine.

"What the hell? What happened? Other Warbler, what are you doing here?" Santana asked.

Rachel spoke up, "I invited him."

Blaine and Kurt both looked to her, "Why?"

"He expressed an interest in how David was doing. I suggested he stop by the party to ask him himself."

"Who's the guy on the ground?" Santana asked.

Dave finally added his two cents. "It's the asshole who outed me at my other school. He showed up here with some random friend of a friend, saw me and Sebastian chatting, and he started to call me a name I would rather not repeat out loud."

"At which point I embraced my boxing classes and punched him. I must admit it was really rather satisfying. Though fuck, my hand hurts." Sebastian shook his hand out, and Dave looked like he was tempted to reach out and rub his fingers over Sebastian's bruised knuckles. Rachel, Santana, Kurt, and Blaine all exchanged looks, and the smallest diva could not contain her small smile of triumph.

Puck took this moment to stick his head into the conversation and say, "Hey, so I found this jerk's 'friend.' He doesn't even know how this ass found out about this party. He's gonna put him in a cab. So it's all good. I was also able to put Finn in the kitchen for a minute so you might want to make a break for it now before-"

"Rachel! I have one more thing I forgot to ask!"

"Shit. God damn it, Finn. Go back into the kitchen before you embarrass yourself even more than you have already," Puck shouted at Finn who definitely had a crowd gathered around him now.

Rachel sighed, and Santana rested her hand along her back in support. "What, Finn? What is so important?"

He looked so defeated, standing there all alone in a crowd. But then he stood taller, his face got harder, and he seemed to just get  _meaner_.

"Did you feel as cheap as you are when you gave it up and let that dirty lesbian slut take your cherry?"

There was a collective gasp around the room. Santana and Puck looked ready to lunge at Finn. However, Rachel walked slowly towards Finn, lifted her hand to his cheek, and said in her saddest voice, "What happened to the boy who was my first love?" Then she kneed him in the crotch and walked out followed by her group of friends and their newest addition, Sebastian.


	14. Extremely Satisfied

Disclaimer: Nothing about  _Glee_ is mine. I am not making any sort of profit from this.

Author's note: Song lyrics are not in quotes; they are just spaced apart. Santana singing is regular type, Rachel singing is  _italicized_ , and the two of them singing together is  **bold**.

* * *

Chapter 14: " _Extremely_ Satisfied"

Rachel didn't release Santana's hand until they were back inside her house and the door was closed safely behind them. When she did let go, all five of the others could see that her hands were shaking, and that she looked like she was about to pass out from stress.

"Hey, Rach, why don't we hang out in the living room for a little while, okay?" Santana asked.

Rachel looked up. When everyone else seemed to agree including Sebastian, Rachel nodded, and Santana led her into the other room.

They all made themselves comfortable. Blaine and Kurt sat on the loveseat next to one another, Santana took the large armchair and pulled Rachel down onto her lap – making the smaller girl squeak and everyone else laugh, and Dave and Sebastian took the couch – each of them sitting farther apart from the other than they probably needed to. It was kind of adorable how awkward they were around one another, especially now that Sebastian had come to Dave's defense.

Kurt finally spoke up, "Rachel, are you okay?"

Rachel sighed, "I'm fine, Kurt." At his skeptical look, she reassured him and everyone else – including her girlfriend whose arms had tightened around her.

"Really. Part of me just wishes that the Finn I used to know hadn't completely disappeared."

"I don't know,  _hermosa_. I don't want to be mean here…"

Dave scoffed, Sebastian smirked a little, and Blaine smiled.

"But I think at least part of the 'Finn you used to know' was seen through rose-tinted glasses. I mean, I was a complete bitch to Finn. So he's never had a reason to be nice to me. But even when I was watching him interact with others, he's never had the best track record."

"Rachel, you know I hate to agree with Santana on things…"

This time Santana glared at Kurt and Sebastian laughed out loud.

"But she's got a little bit of a point. Don't misunderstand me. Finn has been very good to me especially as a brother. However, he's also thrown around words like 'fag' when he gets angry, and we all know he's prone to kicking chairs. I just think that he's never really had a reason to control his anger."

Santana continued.

"I'm not saying I'm a perfect example of anger control, Rach, but I've been working on it. I've also never gotten angry or hateful with my language with friends or family. That does not seem to be something Finn's ever learned. What I'm trying to say – in embarrassingly long and well-thought out sentences in front of other people – is that you shouldn't take it too personally when Finn gets like this. It's not anything you've done right now. It's that he's been like this for a while. He probably needs to see someone about it soon, or he's not going to be able to function normally in the real world."

At everyone's serious faces including Rachel's, Santana followed that up with, "Or I'ma kick his ass in the next time he yells at you. Then it really won't be a problem. But we'll have tried another method first and that's anger management. See? Growth." She smirked, and everyone burst out laughing.

Rachel looked over to the couch and asked, "So, Sebastian, are you staying the night?"

He looked around at everyone's expectant (and in Dave's case, nervous) faces, "Yes, I guess so. I had a couple of drinks, and I was going to catch a ride with the friend I came with. But once I punched that guy, I think my friend left."

"All right, well, Kurt and Blaine are in the guest room/my brother's old room down the hall, Rachel and I are upstairs in my room, and you or Dave can take my parents' bed upstairs, and the other can take the couch down here. Good, now that that is decided, I'm tired and horny, and I'm taking my woman to bed." With that said, Santana stood up and hoisted Rachel up from her arms and swung her over her shoulder and headed toward the stairs.

"Santana!  _Santana! Put me down!_ "

Santana refused to be swayed by Rachel's protests, and her voice drifted upstairs as the shorter girl was carted upstairs by her girlfriend. Blaine, Kurt, and Dave were in hysterics, and Sebastian simply felt in shock.

"Do they always act like this?"

"Well, Santana is being actively silly to distract Rachel from her sadness over Finn. But, yes, this is pretty much how they normally act. If you get past the whole gross lesbian sex thing, they're pretty damn cute together," Dave replied.

"Yes, well, I think we're going to follow their lead and head to bed. Are you two okay in finding where you're going to sleep?" Blaine asked.

"Yeah, we should be good. Night, guys. Thanks for inviting me out. It was a pretty good night overall."

"Yes, Dave, it wouldn't be a party without a naked Puck, a yelling Finn, and a fistfight," Kurt said, being snarky.

"Don't forget the dancing, Kurt! There was drinking and dancing!" Dave laughed.

"Right, of course! How could I forget? Good night, you two."

After Kurt and Blaine went into their room, Dave and Sebastian stood around awkwardly for a few minutes.

"Well, you should take the bed upstairs since I was already planning on taking the couch. I was prepared for it," Dave offered.

"But I wasn't even going to be here originally, you should take it. It will be more comfortable for you."

"Sebastian…"

"Please, Dave."

It was the first time they had both really said each other's names while they were alone together. In the silence, they took the moment in. It felt precious and special like they should remember it.

Dave cleared his throat, "Ok…Okay…I'll take the bed upstairs. Thanks."

Sebastian nodded. As Dave turned and fled upstairs, they both felt like the conversation was unfinished, but neither one knew if they had the confidence to fix that right now. Sebastian sighed and laid down on the couch. He tried to fall asleep and  _not_  think about Dave.

* * *

Santana tossed Rachel onto the bed and closed the door. She forcefully locked it behind her. However, just as she was about to turn around, she found herself pressed tightly against the door.

"Rachel, what are you doing?"

"In all the teasing tonight and the last couple of days, what makes you think that you're the only one of us who's so horny that they can barely breathe?"

Santana gasped and moaned loudly as she felt Rachel grind into her ass. It made her press her own pelvis hard into the door. Santana tried to reach around, but Rachel pinned her hands against the door as well and continued to grind into her ass as she whispered into the tall girl's ear.

"Do you have any idea what it does to me just having you in my life every day? Seeing you? Hearing your voice? Smelling you? God, your  _scent_  is so fucking intoxicating, Tana. Then tonight, dancing with you? Fuck, if I could've taken you on that dance floor, I would've. I was so entranced by you that I almost forgot we were going to fuck with Puck's head. Having you on his bed? If I didn't know he would enjoy it so much, I would've fucked you until you drenched his sheets in your come."

That really made Santana moan, and she tried to thrust backwards. She tried to get Rachel to do something –  _anything_  more than what she was doing with her pelvis and ass. Fuck, she was driving her crazy!

"You know what I enjoy most about the outfit you chose to wear tonight, baby?"

At this point, Santana could barely think. All she could get out was, "Hmm?"

"Well, it shows off your legs fabulously. It makes dancing with you really easy, and it makes doing things like  _this_  very easy."

With no other warning, Rachel spread Santana's legs, moved her thong aside, and thrust three fingers inside Santana from behind. Santana let out a half moan/scream and arched her back away from the wall as far as she could, but Rachel's body held her there.

"Fuck, Rachel,  _muy bueno!_ "

"Mmm, I know it's good, baby. I can feel you gripping around my fingers. Now, I want you to brace yourself against the door with your hands and stick your ass out a little. Do you want to know why?"

Santana moaned as she adjusted to Rachel's request and felt her girlfriend's fingers moving inside of her, her thong being slid down her legs, and her short black dress being lifted up over her ass.

"Why?"

Rachel lifted her unoccupied hand and turned Santana's head so that she was looking back into her eyes for a minute.

"Because when Finn asked if I felt cheap when you took my cherry, I wanted to tell him, 'No, I feel fucking amazing when I have sex with you. Tonight, I'm going to go home and fuck my girlfriend's brains out. I'm gonna make her scream so loud that you'll hear it from every corner of Lima, and I'll love every fucking minute of it.' So, Santana, I'm going to fuck you so hard you're going to see stars and come like you've never come before. That's why."

Then Rachel leaned in, kissed Santana deeply, and bit her lower lip until the taller girl moaned. Then she pulled back and warned, "Brace yourself, baby."

Santana nodded. She had just enough time to turn her head back around and rebrace her hands against the door as Rachel wrapped her free arm around her waist and pulled her inside hand almost all of the way out. Then she started to fuck her.

Santana had had sex before. She'd had sex with Brittany and Puck and (ugh) even Finn. She'd made love with Rachel, and they'd had sex together before this. But until now she'd never really been _fucked_. The way Rachel was thrusting into her – harder and harder, rubbing along her g-spot, making her moan and scream almost every time – was making her feel so thoroughly  _taken_  that she could barely express the feeling. Hands down, it was the hottest, most passionate feeling Santana had ever experienced, but she'd never have been able to feel this way with anyone else. This kind of loss of control? She could only let something like this happen with Rachel, the love of her life.

"Tana, baby, you with me?"

"God, yes, just…so good. Strong. Feels amazing, baby.  _Fuck._ "

Rachel chuckled. She was breathing heavily. Every thrust was making the back of her hand hit her clit inside her jeans. It was slowly driving Rachel insane, and the noises Santana was making weren't helping either.

"Do you want to come, baby?"

"Ye…yes…mmmm…"

"Can you feel my fingers, Tana? Can you feel them rubbing across your g-spot? Can you feel me along your back? Can you feel me around you? Inside you? I'm everywhere,  _querida_. I'm all over you and throughout you. You've never been more thoroughly filled, have you?"

"N…no."

"All you have to do to come is will it. I'm right here with you, Santana. I'm not going anywhere. I'm with you every step of the way. I won't let you go. You can come, Santana. I'm fucking you against this door in nothing but your little black dress. You're my girl, and I'm fucking you senseless. You come."

"I…I'm almost there…"

"Come, Santana. Fucking come all over my hand. You're so goddamn wet. You're dripping onto the floor with how wet you are and how hard I'm fucking you, how I'm taking you. This is what Puck would love to see and can't. No one but the two of us gets to see this, Santana. Come for me. Fucking come for me. Now."

With that last word out of Rachel's mouth and with the support of Rachel's arm and her fingers moving furiously against the Latina's g-spot, Santana came so hard that she definitely drenched Rachel's hand and the floor. Her entire back arched and her arms came off the door and wrapped backwards and around her girlfriend's neck as her entire body shook with her orgasm. It was so intense that her scream of ecstasy was silent.

At the same time, Rachel's hand had been jarred hard into her own pelvis. The excitement of the night and her own words to Santana – as well as watching her orgasm – shattered Rachel's own control. As Santana was coming down, she realized that Rachel was starting to collapse from the shaking of her own body. Both girls slid to the floor as Santana slid behind Rachel. The taller girl held the shorter one as she came down from her own orgasm, which was surprisingly strong for being caused by nothing more than the back of her own hand and the sensations around her. Neither girl could really complain about that.

When both girls were aware enough, Santana looked into Rachel's eyes and whispered, "Hi."

Rachel smiled, "Hello."

After sitting on the floor for a few more minutes, Rachel took Santana's hand. They stood up, stripped down, and climbed into bed. They drifted off with Rachel safely cocooned in Santana's big spoon.

* * *

Sebastian sat up and lifted his pillow, ready to throw it at the noises he could hear in the dark. He thought the noise it might one of the other couples, but he didn't want to risk it. What if it was an intruder?

"Who's there?" He whisper-shouted.

"Ahh! Jesus, you scared me, Sebastian!"

"Sorry, Dave, I thought you might be a burglar or something."

"No, sadly, I just really can't sleep upstairs. Do you mind I sleep down here on some blankets on the floor?"

"Why can't you sleep upstairs?"

"Oh, I'm sure you'll be able to tell in a minute."

"What do you—"

" _Fuck!_ "

This was followed by a lot of moans that were definitely getting louder as time went on.

Sebastian blushed to the tips of his ears and cleared his throat, "Ah, ahem. I can see why that might be an issue."

"Trust me, it is much worse upstairs. I can hope they'll be done soon, but it sounds like Rachel is giving Santana  _quite_  the workout. I thought that if I wanted to save our friendship I should come down here so I don't hear all the gory details."

"Okay, ick, I didn't need those details!"

"I know! Neither did I, frankly. However, I don't think either of them is thinking very clearly right now. Volume is clearly not something they're really concerned with that the moment."

"All right, well, settle down, and we can try to get some sleep. Hopefully they'll go to sleep soon."

After about ten minutes of trying to  _not_  to listen to the sex going on upstairs, Sebastian spoke up, "Dave, I'm really so sorry about my stupid comment at the gay bar the other day. I didn't mean it. I was being an ass to everyone because I was pissed off, and I shouldn't have taken it out on you."

Dave sat up and sat on the couch next to Sebastian. "It's really okay, Sebastian. I mean, it wasn't the only reason I tried to commit suicide. We should all think about what we say so that bullying doesn't lead to kids like me thinking there is no other way out. The kids at my school were the real reason. You are learning from your mistakes, and I have the chance to do that too now. That's what's important."

Sebastian smiled and reached over taking Dave's hand in his. They glanced up and looked into one another's eyes. The moment seemed to slow down once more, and they both leaned in towards each other. As their lips brushed, each teen had a similar thought: this is a perfect moment.

That perfect moment lasted for all of ten seconds. Then the kiss was interrupted as another sound joined the ones that could be heard from upstairs.

"Oh, Blaine.  _Yes!_ "

Both boys pulled back quickly from their first kiss, looked toward the guest room, glanced upstairs where the moans could still be heard, and then burst out laughing.

"Well, I guess it's nice to know our first kiss happened in a safe space," Dave said.

"Definitely, which is why I am going to take this opportunity to ask you out on our first date. David Karofsky, would you like to go out for coffee at the Lima Bean with me next Sunday? I know it's much more public, but I would really love to go with you and—"

Dave cut Sebastian off with another kiss, "That sounds perfect. Thank you. I would love to, Sebastian."

They smiled and decided to try to look through the DVD collection since it didn't look like they would be getting any sleep anytime soon with all the action going on in the house.

* * *

The following week at school, the jokes among their group of friends were endless. Dave could not stop teasing Santana, Rachel, Kurt, and Blaine for their level of noise after the party. While Rachel and the boys blushed profusely, Santana just laughed her ass off.

"Did it help you get any action with Other Warbler? Don't think I didn't see that you two were both sleeping in the living room the next morning, Davey-boy."

Dave blushed and mumbled something.

"What was that? I couldn't quite hear you?"

"Maybe it's because you screamed too loudly this weekend in bed? You should go get your hearing checked, Santana." Dave joked.

Rachel blushed even more furiously and tried to hide her head in her locker. Meanwhile, Santana just shook her head, "I am not ashamed that my girlfriend knows how to get me off. Also, you aren't going to distract me from our convo, Dave. Did you and Sebastian get it on?"

"We kissed. We're also going out to the Lima Bean for our first date this coming weekend. There, satisfied?"

Kurt, Blaine, and Rachel squealed. While the boys started thinking of outfits Dave could wear for the date, Rachel closed her locker and answered his question for Santana, "And yes, she is _extremely_  satisfied. Didn't you hear her the other night? I think you might need to get  _your_  hearing checked, David."

Santana burst out laughing as her girlfriend grabbed her hand. They walked down the hall following Kurt and Blaine who were already giving Dave more advice than he might ever want or need on his first date plans.

They headed into Glee practice and Mr. Schue announced that they would be continuing the Whitney Houston theme that they had started on Monday. Brittany had performed  _I Wanna Dance with Somebody (Who Loves Me)_ , and she had blown them all away with her performance. They all called for Mercedes to do her version of  _I Will Always Love You_  again. Now it was time for a surprise Santana had been working on.

"All right, guys, who wants to perform the next Whitney song?" Mr. Schue asked.

Santana stood up from her seat next to Rachel and her girlfriend looked really surprised.

"Okay, so I realize that everyone sort of just figures that Rachel comes into Glee and sings and has a great voice and it's just a given. I know I used to think that as well. Hell, my voice is amazing, and I used to think I didn't need to rehearse very much either. But the crazy thing is that when you start dating her, you realize how much time she actually spends rehearsing and going to classes outside of Glee for her voice and for dance and acting. I'm not gonna get more into that, 'cause I don't need to call you all idiots more than I already do or look even more like a marshmallow. Here's my point: Rach and I have been having fun rehearsing for our auditions – her's for NYADA, mine for Julliard – by singing this Whitney Houston song recently, and I decided we're going to perform it for you guys today."

"What? Santana, I'm not prepared to—"

"Who are you kidding, Rachel? Get your hot ass up here and perform this damn duet with me before I look like a complete idiot."

"San, I'm not going to do it. I haven't had time to properly choreograph and—"

I don't know why I like it, ha

I just do

Santana could see Rachel trying to resist the lure of the song and Santana's moving hips, but it was definitely a battle she was losing.

Ooh, ooh. Hee

I've been hearing your heartbeat inside of me

I keep your photograph beside my bed

Livin' in a world of fantasies

I can't get you out of my head

This is the point where Rachel had to jump in physically and vocally to make sure that she didn't miss her cue, which is what Santana was counting on. Her girl was wonderfully predictable when it came to music.

_I've been waiting for the phone to ring all night  
_

_Why you wanna make me feel so good?  
_

_I've got a love of my own, baby  
_

_I shouldn't get so hung up on you_

**I remember the way that we touched**

**I wish I didn't like it so much, Oh  
**

**I get so emotional, baby**

**Every time I think of you  
**

**I get so emotional, baby  
**

**Ain't it shocking what love can do?**

God, they sounded amazing together. Santana really wished that they'd sung together more often before this year – before they dated. Maybe they would have realized how amazing their chemistry was sooner if they had? Whatever, it was all worth it to sing with one another, to do the thing she loved, to dance with the girl that she loved, and to see the joy across Rachel's face as she poured all of herself into her voice.

_Ain't it shocking what love can do?_

**Ain't it shocking what love can do? Hee**

**I gotta watch you walk in the room, baby  
**

**I gotta watch you walk out, mm-hmm  
**

**I like the animal way that you move  
**

**And when you talk, I just watch your mouth**

**Oh, I remember the way that we touched**

**I wish I didn't like it so much**

(No, no, no)

**I get so emotional, baby  
**

**Every time I think of you  
**

**I get so emotional, baby  
**

**Ain't it shocking what love can do?**

I get so emotional….

Oh baby

**Oh, oh yea!**

Once the song was over, the entire Glee club was on their feet cheering. Santana picked Rachel up and swung her around until the world was spinning.

Rachel laughed and pulled Santana in for a kiss that had Mr. Schue telling them to "Break it up!" within a couple of seconds. The kiss also had a number of boys in the room shifting in their seats and trying not to stare too much. The two girls proceeded to stare into one another's eyes as Mr. Schue called an end to Glee rehearsal for the day and the other students started to file out.

"What's gotten into you, Tana? You're not usually this…"

"Openly sentimental and sappy?"

"Yes, I guess."

"Well, I guess I just realized that I was afraid of this town for so long, and now I don't need to be. I've got you and our friends, and we have our families. We have bright futures ahead of us, and we can face anything that comes our way. So what's there to be afraid of anymore? I want to embrace life, not shrink away from it."

Rachel flashed Santana her biggest "show-stopping" smile as they linked hands and walked out of the choir room and down the hall heading towards the parking lot. As Santana unlocked her car door for her girlfriend, Rachel leaned up, wrapped her arms around Santana's neck, and kissed her long and deep until they were both out of breath.

"I love you, Santana Lopez, so much that my heart hurts sometimes."

Santana smiled in the way only reserved for her girl. As she opened the door and Rachel slid into the car, she said, "I love you too,  _preciosa_."

Santana walked around the car and got in on the driver's side. However, neither girl noticed the football player from the party the other night – the one Sebastian had knocked out – standing on the far side of the lot, watching their car drive off.

* * *

Additional author's note: I know. I'm evil to end on a slightly more ominous note! However, unlike in the show, I wanted at least a  _little_  bit of lead-up to my version of the episode  _Choke_ , which is what my next chapter will be dealing with. It will be quite different from the show, but it will have some connections to the episode like the NYADA auditions.

Also, if you're wondering why I have been going into more detail about Santana and Rachel and Dave and Sebastian as opposed to Kurt and Blaine as a couple, it is mostly because Kurt and Blaine were already a great couple on the show and in my mind. Therefore, I felt for my story that there is more to delve into with the other two couples.

Nevetheless, especially with the NYADA auditions, Prom, and graduation, they'll get some more face time. So if you're worried about that, please don't be! As always, review please.


	15. Choke

Disclaimer:  _Glee_ is not owned by me.

Author's note: This one is more personal. I've added more of the internal monologues that I feel have been missing in some ways. Also, this chapter is intentionally not linear. So let's hope it still makes sense. Read on and enjoy. As ever, please review.

**WARNING: THIS CHAPTER IS DARK. IT HAS THEMES THAT COULD DEFINITELY BE TRIGGERS. PLEASE BE AWARE THAT I ADDRESS THOSE ISSUES HERE. I would go into more detail, but that would spoil the story itself. Please keep this in mind as you read this chapter.**

* * *

Chapter 15: "Choke"

_Choke._

_They say it sometimes about theater and the stage – that in a performance you just freeze up. You see all those people out there, and you just don't know what to do. I've never had that problem. Crowds of people simply meant that I could show myself off. Maybe there would be someone important out there. Maybe I would get noticed. Maybe I'd finally end up on Broadway like I always dreamed._

_Choke._

_I never understood it._

_I understand it now. For the first time in my life, I'm choking, and I never thought I would hope for this, but I really wish it were because of a performance._

_I can't breathe, and I think I'm starting to lose consciousness. You fight, and you fight, but I don't think I can fight anymore._

_I'm sorry, Santana. I tried. I fought. But then?_

_I choked._

* * *

_Running. I'm running out of breath. God damn it, why are these fucking hallways so long?_

_Oh, stop distracting yourself, just find her. How could she be late? Why would she be late?_

_She might have choked. She's been nervous all day._

_She's probably in the bathroom. No, you checked there already._

_Why would she choke? She's the most confident person you know. She had this performance on lock._

_She couldn't have choked._

_Why are you running then? Why isn't she there? She's never late to anything. I hate being the responsible one. That's her job. I'm the screw-up. I'm the one who doesn't want to commit to things._

_Why am I so afraid?_

_Because you know her. She's the love of your life, and she wouldn't miss this for anything._

_So where is she?_

_Why can't I breathe?_

_Shit, think! Okay, I'll check her favorite place. Maybe she's there. Maybe she's fine. Maybe she just got caught up in her rehearsal…_

_But I know I'm just lying to myself. God, Rachel, I'm so sorry. I should've tried harder. I should've fought for you more. Fuck, I'm running as fast as I can, but as I turn the corner I know…none of it was enough._

_I choked._

* * *

**8 Hours Before**

"You're joking."

"No, seriously. There I was on my date with Sebastian and Rachel walks right in!"

Santana turned to her girlfriend and raised her eyebrow, "Weren't you supposed to be rehearsing all weekend non-stop for your NYADA audition this weekend? Which is this afternoon, may I remind you, and the reason I could not come over and thoroughly distract you with my beauty. How did you have time to stop by and threaten Sebastian on his first date with Dave?"

Rachel huffed and closed her locker.

"Tana, just because you aren't doing air quotes does not mean that I can't tell you're making fun of my speech patterns and mannerisms. Don't think I don't know it's because you wanted to get your 'sweet lady kisses on' this weekend, and you're really fucking horny because I told you that you couldn't come over. However, for that cut against me, you get to hold my books while we walk to class."

Kurt and Blaine walked up as Santana rolled her eyes and Dave laughed at their antics.

"Who didn't get any kisses this weekend?" Kurt asked.

Rachel replied, "Well, before Santana interrupted us with her rapier wit and got herself without kisses – and without sex if she's not careful – I was going to make Dave tell us how his date went with Sebastian."

Santana unceremoniously dropped Rachel's books into Dave's arms, "Whoa,  _espera_.No sex? Come on! It was a joke, Rach. I promise you, the entire weekend without sex was punishment enough. I can't hold out much longer.  _You_  can't hold out much longer! I love the way you talk. You know I could listen to your voice for hours, baby."

Santana wrapped her arms around Rachel from behind and started to tickle her. Rachel squealed and tried to wiggle out of her arms, and it was hard to tell who was winning. That is until Dave handed Kurt the books – which made the skinnier teen almost fall over under the weight – and he and Blaine rushed in to help each side get the upper hand.

Dave: "Rachel, try to kick her shins!"

Blaine: "Santana, the backs of her knees are really ticklish!"

Kurt: "You're all fighting like idiots! Go for the hair! Nothing ends a girl or gay tussle like messing up the 'do!"

When it looked like their "fight" might actually start to draw attention from teachers – and they were  _definitely_  already drawing a crowd of students – Rachel thought of the perfect ploy.

"Oh, my God, is that Cheerio not wearing any spankies?" Rachel shouted.

Santana immediately whipped her head around (I mean, come on, she may be a one-woman girl now, but that didn't mean she was  _blind_ ) and Rachel finally wriggled free and started to skip down the hall.

"I'll only let the fact that that worked on you slide because I love to win, Santana, but we have two minutes to get to History. If I you're late and you don't have my books, I'll be most displeased. See you there!" With that, she giggled and continued to skip down the hall.

Dave helped Santana up off the floor, and Kurt dropped the books back in Santana's arms. Blaine turned to all three of them and asked the question that was on all of their minds: "Is she actually _skipping_  to class?"

Santana just supported the books more fully and shook her head at the awesome absurdity (definitely spending way too much time with Rachel) of it all.

"Yup, that's my girl. Gets huffy at me for making fun of her, uses my wandering eye to get the upper hand, and then fucking  _skips_  off in victory. And somehow, she still managed to get me to carry all of her heavy-ass books for her."

The old Santana would have grumbled. The old Santana would have gotten angry and refused to carry the books just because, dropping them on the floor and gone to get a slushy maybe to throw in someone's face.

This Santana chuckled and motioned down the hall with her head since her hands were full.

"I'm so fucking gone on this girl. Well, we better get to class, boys, before I'm in even more trouble than I already am."

As they walked down the hall, Kurt asked, "When did Rachel get so gleeful at winning? I mean, I know she's always loved being number one, but I don't remember her being quite so…diabolical and sneaky."

Dave and Blaine looked at Kurt and then turned their heads towards Santana.

Kurt shook his head, which they all realized was the natural response around the Pezberry pair.

"Never mind. I think I know where she got that habit from."

Just before walking into History class and not even glancing back at the three of them, Santana whispered, "Damn right and proud of it!"

* * *

_Usually I'd be trying to kill him right now. Usually I'd be hitting him, over and over, screaming at him in Spanish until my throat is raw and I can barely see from the tears in his eyes and the blood on his face._

_But he doesn't matter, not in this moment._

_I'm speaking to her in Spanish, over and over._

_My throat is raw from screaming for help._

_I can barely see from the tears in my own eyes._

_There's so much blood on her face. So much blood on me. Some is his. I know that. I can see she fought him, my beautiful, brave girl. Some is mine, from when I found him here, with her. But_ Dios mio _! So much is hers, and I can't tell where it's all coming from._

_Then I see it through all the tears and the blood as I hold her. I see her throat._

_And I choke._

* * *

_She's here. I can hear her. I can feel her hands on me, holding me tight. I know everything will be okay now. I wish I could see her, but I'm afraid to open my eyes._

_I've never really been truly afraid before. I thought I was afraid before my audition today, but I didn't really know the meaning of the word fear then._

_I learned the meaning this afternoon. I learned it when he found me in my safe space. I learned it when he grabbed me and pinned me up against the wall. I learned what true fear was when he covered my mouth and told me if I screamed he would cover my mouth until I stopped breathing altogether._

_I learned about being afraid when he pulled a knife out, and I thought he was going to use it on me. Instead, he held me against the wall and used it to cut my clothes, slowly, so I would know what he was doing. Then he started to say the most horrible things._

_I'm remembering it so clearly now as I try to shut it all out, as I am locked in my fear of opening my eyes. If I open my eyes, I'm afraid Santana's arms around me will disappear, and I'll still be there with him, and he'll still be hurting me._

_I feel her. I do. I know she threw him off me. But I can still feel him, still smell him, still hear him..._

_"You think you're all so special – that you don't need us. It's bad enough that those pansy boys walk around giving men a bad name, but you fucking dykes are the worst. You know what you need? You need a real man to show you what sex should be. I'm gonna fucking rock your world, whore. And then I'm gonna go find your Spic slut and give it to her just as good."_

_I remember now. I was going to do exactly what he said and try to find a safe opening to fight back like they tell you to in self-defense class. But then he threatened Santana. He threatened my girlfriend. That's when I lost it. I fought back in any way I could. The knife went flying and so did his fists. As a last resort, his hand went around my neck._

_I choked._

* * *

**4 Hours Earlier**

They were all sitting at lunch, and Rachel once again remembered what she had been trying to find out from Dave earlier.

"David, you managed to use my distraction with Santana earlier to dodge my question. How did your date go with Sebastian?"

All of Glee club was there including the newly official couple Samcedes. Santana couldn't help notice that Christian-boy and Quinn were flirting a little (which was just kinda weird, but whatever). This thought caused Santana to glance over at Brittany, who was currently in a deep conversation with Puck, and they both actually seemed invested in the conversation. Hmmm, she'd definitely have to keep a close eye on that shit. But, damn, they were a really fucking incestuous and couply group, weren't they?

At this question, they had everyone's attention.

Dave looked really uncomfortable, but he knew that they all cared about him. So he nodded and said, "Well, we met for coffee—"

"Ooh, not the best choice. I find that you then have to pee a lot. Did you have to excuse yourself a lot?" This was, of course, from Brittany.

Everyone laughed, and Dave just nodded.

"That's a very good point, Brittany, but no. We were both so nervous that neither of us really drank the drinks we had."

When everyone continued to stare at him expectantly, Dave knew that they wouldn't be satisfied until he told the whole story. "We talked about our childhoods. I talked about football. He talked about singing and the Warblers. We laughed. We held hands a little—"

"Did you kiss?" This was from Puck, naturally. When he got some weird looks, he shrugged, "What, even if it's two dudes, I want to know if my man got to any of the good stuff. I mean, isn't that the point of a date?"

"They had their first kiss the other night, ass-hat. And I doubt that in a public coffee shop in Lima, Ohio, that they were going to attempt Round 2. Am I right?"

Dave nodded.

"Now shut up and let him tell the rest of the story. I'm still waiting to hear when my girlfriend got really nosy and inappropriate and showed up to spoil it all." This was Santana's two cents.

Quinn spoke up then as everyone turned to look at Rachel (it was actually becoming like a tennis match, which is usually how Glee lunches went).

"You interrupted their date? Why?"

Rachel cleared her throat, and everyone tried to see how she could save face on this one, especially Dave, who had been there.

"First of all, I was there to get a restorative drink as a slight break from my NYADA audition rehearsals as Santana and Dave well know. Secondly, Dave  _did_  get up to go to the bathroom at one point. That is when I took the opportunity to…kindly let Sebastian know that if he broke Dave's heart, I'd be most upset."

"Rachel, you may have been gone by the time I got back, but Sebastian let me know what you said, and that is not at all how you put it. He thought it was cute, thankfully, that you care enough about me to threaten him."

Mercedes leaned forward.

"You threatened him?!"

When it was clear that Rachel was not going to tell anyone what she said, Dave spoke up again.

"Yes. She said, and I quote, 'While I understand that you have a great affection for David, I have come to love him and cherish him deeply as a friend. If you even think of breaking his heart or hurting him in any way, I will crush you in every way possible. and I definitely do not mean simply in competitions. I will make your life a living hell. Don't think I can't. I date Santana Lopez. Trust me: they would never be able to charge me with a single thing. You keep him happy, I'll be happy.  _Comprende?_ ' Apparently, you also said it with your Show Choir smile on your face the entire time. He said it was more terrifying than anything he's ever seen before."

Everyone at the table had scooted back at least a foot from Rachel by the end of this story except for Santana.

"Oh, please. You've seen Rachel get pissed at Finn before. Jesus, I think it's hot. My girl's got attitude. It's totally sexy."

Mike shivered a little and said, "I guess it makes sense that you would find that attractive, but I'm definitely not getting on your bad side anytime soon, Rachel. No offense."

Rachel nodded and continued to eat her lunch.

"Probably a good idea. Honestly though? Threats like that are only for those who go after the ones I truly love and care about. I would never hurt anyone who didn't try to hurt the ones I love."

Santana kissed the side of her head, "Totally,  _hermosa._ "

* * *

_I have to hold on to Rachel tighter as she starts to thrash her arms around. She's trying to shout, I think, but her throat…_

_"Rachel, hermosa. I'm here. It's me. You're okay now. He can't hurt you anymore,_ querida _. Stop fighting me, love. Please."_

_I'm definitely still crying, and I know Rachel is, but she still has her eyes closed and she's thrashing her arms around. I'm afraid she's going to hurts herself more. Fuck, where the hell is that damn ambulance? I can hear Puck and Dave in the background. I think they tied the fucker to a chair or something in the other room, but they're staying to make sure he doesn't come to and to watch over us I think. All I really know is that Rachel is thrashing around, and I don't know what to do to help her._

_"Rachel, baby, please, you need to stop. You're going to hurt yourself. Please. It's me, Santana. Just open your eyes, baby girl. You'll see me, okay? I'm right here. I'm not going anywhere."_

_Then I hear it. She's trying to say something._

_"No, Rach, stop, your throat—"_

_Rachel finally gets a grip around the back of my head. She pulls me down towards her head where she's lying in my arms._

_I'm still trying to get her to stop talking when I finally understand what she's saying._

_My heart breaks._

_In the barest, smallest whisper – a sound I never thought I would hear from my strong, beautiful, vibrant singer of a girlfriend – I hear what she's been trying to say to me, what she's been fighting off for the last few minutes._

_"I'm afraid…I'm afraid you're a dream…that he's still here…trying to get inside me…trying to get inside you…"_

_I choke._

* * *

_As I finally tell Santana my fear, as I finally make her understand why I can't open my eyes, I hear her choke on her own tears._

_I didn't want her to know the fear. I didn't want her to know my terror. I wanted to protect her. That's why I fought him – why I wouldn't let that bastard touch her._

_But what if I wasn't strong enough? What if I really was dreaming? What if I had passed out, he'd taken what he wanted from me and then gone after her?_

_What if my Santana was lying somewhere, broken and bleeding like I was right now?_

_Through my fresh bout of agony, both emotional and physical, I hear her once more. God, I hope she's real._

_Santana clears her throat._

" _Rachel, baby. I want you to listen to me. He didn't get inside you. Do you hear me? I got here in time. He still had his pants buttoned. You fought him off, baby girl. He never got that far, okay? Do you hear me?"_

_I can hear her words, but at first they don't make sense. Then I start to truly let them sink in, and I turn my head a little into her side even though it hurts to move. I whisper, since that is the loudest sound I can make._

" _He didn't—he didn't—r—rape me?"_

_I choke on the words._

_Santana said firmly, "No, he didn't rape you. He never got the chance."_

_I ask her the question I fear most – more than I fear for myself at the moment._

" _He said…did he go after you? I tried to stop him. He said—he said he was going to go after you too, and I tried so hard to stop him—"_

_Santana pulled me closer, not enough to hurt, but I could feel her cry harder, "No,_ querida _. He never laid a finger on me. You were my protector. You saved me. You fought him off, and you saved us. You can open your eyes now."_

_I catch my breath, which hurts._

" _Is it really over? Are you really here?"_

_"It's really over. I'm really here. I'm not going anywhere."_

_"Promise?" I whisper. I feel lightheaded again._

_"I promise."_

_She's still crying. As I finally open my eyes and look into hers, I want to tell her that I'm okay and that I hate it when she cries._

_But then I choke on the words, because I feel even more lightheaded. The last thing I hear is Santana calling my name as I drift off into the darkness._

* * *

**THE AUDITION**

Rachel was going to watch Kurt's audition since she really wanted to be there to root for him no matter how much she was afraid it might psych her out. Besides, an actress had to be able to perform despite the competition.

She knew Santana was waiting out there as was all of the Glee club and Carmen Tibideaux, the judge. She was still nervous, but she kept her moment earlier with her girlfriend close to her heart. She could do this.

However, before Kurt started, she still wanted to get one more rehearsal under her belt in her safe space, her haven: the choir room. She knew no one would be in there since school was out for the day. Besides, only the Glee kids hung out there. So she decided to a quick final run-through of her marvelous rendition of Barbra's iconic  _Don't Rain on My Parade_. It had successfully helped them win Sectionals the first time around, so she figured it couldn't hurt.

What did hurt, however, was the shoulder that slammed into her back as she was thrown into the room. The door was locked behind her. She looked up from where she was shoved down on the floor, prepared to give an earful to the asshole student who thought it was a good (or healthy) idea to pick on Santana Lopez's girlfriend. That's when she started to realize her mistake.

He wasn't a McKinley student. At first, she didn't even recognize him until she looked closer at the mean, deadly look in his eyes. She realized who he was: the jock from David's other school, the guy who'd been knocked out at the party the other night. Then she realized that she was locked in a room in the far back of the school, she'd left her phone in the auditorium, and no one knew where she was. No one would be looking for her, not even Santana, until they called her name for her audition, which would be at least another 10 or 15 minutes. That was a long time for someone as small as her to fight off someone as large as him all by herself.

So she'd have to try to talk him down. Distract him. Delay him. Find her opening.

She'd be okay. She could do this.

"Excuse me, Mitchell, right? That's your name? You know, it really is quite rude to shove someone. If you wanted to talk to me, all you had to do was ask."

He sneered, "I didn't want to  _talk_  to you. I wanted to stop you."

"Stop me?"

He nodded.

"I've been following you two for days now. At first, I thought she was the worst, but it's you. You're the one always touching her and grabbing her hand and pulling her into closets to do dirty, filthy things. Everyone knew she slept around before. But you just make her flaunt your sex everywhere, instead of keeping it behind closed doors where it belongs."

Rachel's voice shook a little since his eyes had become crazed, and he'd backed her into a corner (literally) at this point, but she said, "We don't flaunt it. We just don't think that love is something that should be hidden away. It's not something to be ashamed of."

He leaned in and shouted, " _Love?!_   _It's not love!_  It's disgusting. You're disgusting. I thought if I caught you alone somewhere and explained all of this to you that you'd understand. But you just don't get it, do you? Do I really need to spell it out? We're the only way for you. Once you and the Latina realize that men are the only way to truly find love and happiness, then everything will be okay again."

Rachel was definitely disturbed by what he was saying. The more he spoke, the more she realized how much danger she was really in.

"I don't hate men, Mitchell. In fact, I loved my boyfriend and consider myself bisexual. I simply fell out of love with him and in love with Santana. You can't just explain the world away in black and white. There are shades of gray in everything."

That was not the right thing to say at all, which she knew. But Rachel's fathers raised her to be unashamed of who they were and who she was, and she wasn't going to back down from everything she believed in out of fear.

Mitchell didn't see it that way. She never saw the fist he pulled back and slammed into the side of her head, but she definitely felt the knife when he held her against the wall.

Rachel went in and out of consciousness for the next little bit as he beat her up a little more. But when he held the knife up to cut off her clothes and told her he was going to show her what a real man could do, she came back to full alertness. And when he threatened Santana, she fought back with all she had.

Eventually though, Mitchell got the upper hand. He was bigger and stronger, and he finally managed to get both hands around her throat and started to choke the fight – and the life – out of her.

At that moment, her knight in shining armor came to rescue her. Santana and Puck kicked in the door, and Dave threw the bastard across the room – as far away from Rachel as possible.

Santana finally reached her girlfriend, whom she had spent the last 30 minutes searching all of McKinley for, all the while getting more and more worried. She'd gone through every bathroom stall and every nook and cranny – including that janitor's closest they'd used as their safe haven this afternoon – until she'd finally realized that Rachel, despite all her talent, would still have wanted to rehearse.

Dave and Puck had apparently had the same thought since they were right around the corner to the choir room when she careened through. When it was locked and they heard someone choking, that was when they knew something was horribly wrong.

Holding Rachel now – the small girl broken and bleeding, barely able to speak around her crushed throat…what Santana wouldn't give for that closet right now.

* * *

**2 Hours Earlier**

"A closet? Really? Didn't we come out of one of these a while ago?"

"Has anyone ever told you that you're a funny girl, Santana Lopez?"

"Why I believe you have, Miss Rachel Berry. But I don't believe you've ever been sincere."

"Well, keep using words like sincere and you'll hear me be a lot more agreeable with you, I believe. You know how large vocabularies turn me on."

"Large 'vocabularies,' huh? I don't think it was my large vocabulary that was turning you on the other night, baby girl. I definitely think it was the large—"

Rachel cut her girlfriend off as she kissed her deeply. She'd pulled her into the janitor's closet to distract herself from her NYADA nerves, not get more worked up by thinking about the strap-on that they'd used last week. The kisses weren't a much better alternative, though. The hands that had wandered to her ass weren't helping much either.

Rachel pulled back and rested her head against the taller girl's shoulder. Santana understood that her girlfriend needed a minute and wrapped her arms around the ball of nerves.

Rachel took a deep breath and sighed.

"I just needed a minute that was just ours, just for the two of us. This whole week seemed to whip by. I know that I needed the practice time free of distraction, but I really did miss you,  _querida._ Don't tell anyone I said this, but I think the nerves are finally catching up with me."

Santana smiled softly into her hair and said, "That only means you're just a little bit human like the rest of us, Rachel. You're going to do fantastic at the audition today, and I'll be right there watching you."

Rachel peered up at her through her hair.

"Promise?"

Santana smiled and kissed her nose.

"I promise."

* * *

Author's note: I'll let the chapter speak for itself. Please review and thank you for sticking with me.


	16. Moving Forward

Disclaimer:  _Glee_ is not my property and neither is  _Teen Wolf_. Fox and MTV, please continue not sue me.

Author's note: So here it is. As I mentioned previosly, I hae sixteen of the chapters for this story written so far, and I plan to do about twenty of them all total. I started this over a year ago, but with my life taking over in between I took a hiatus. However, here it is all in one piece so far, and the other chapters should be forthcoming soon.

While I was gone, I was writing some other stuff on the side. While I didn't post any of it since it's all unfinished, I do have some fun things coming down the pipe soon, though. I have an almost complete JulyBerry, if that's your thing. I also just finished a story for another show I've never written for before (MTV's  _Teen Wolf_ ). My sister and I challenged each other to a write-off, and this _Teen Wolf_  story is the result. I'll post that right after this, so if that is your thing, enjoy.

I know that for everyone still watching  _Glee_  "Ditto" is quite a bit behind now. I think the story continues to have relevance, and it holds a special place in my heart. I hope you agree. As always, please comment and review!

Lastly, in this chapter when there are songs,  _italics means one person is singing._ _ **Bold italics means multiple people are singing**_ **.**

* * *

Chapter 16: "Moving Forward"

Rachel blinked open her eyes as the sun streamed into her room. She knew the sun's appearance meant that she'd have to try to get up and go to school, but she really just wanted to stay in this moment a little longer. She turned over and burrowed closer into her girlfriend, feeling Santana's arms wrap around her, making her feel like she was in the safest place in the world. The illusion of peace and calm was shattered when her dad knocked on the door.

"Rachel? Santana? Time for school, you two." All he got in response was a grumbled sort of groan that could have come from either girl at this point. Leroy followed his first comment up with, "Santana, if she's not out of bed and ready for school in 30 minutes, I'm coming in and dragging you both out of there by force. I don't think you two want that, okay?"

Santana finally lifted her head enough to grunt out, "Mm-hmm, sure thing, Leroy. We gots it as long as you gots some coffee down there!"

Rachel could hear her dad chuckle as he walked down the stairs, which must mean caffeine was present in the kitchen in some form. Thank God. There was only so much horror Rachel could handle in one morning. No caffeine on her first day back to school after her assault was not on the list of things she could tolerate today.

Santana unwrapped her arms from around Rachel and sat up a little, stretching her arms above her head and yawning loudly. Rachel glanced away as her McKinley High gym shirt rode up indecently high on her stomach. Santana glanced at Rachel and lowered her arms as subtly as she could. It wasn't something they talked about, but in the month since the attack, they hadn't even contemplated doing anything sexual together. Rachel had to heal, and Santana was afraid that, after almost being raped, her girlfriend wouldn't want to be touched in that way. Rachel was simply afraid her own body might not react the way it used to. She was also afraid that Santana might not find her sexually attractive anymore, but that was one fear she definitely was not planning on voicing today or any time soon.

So they were basically at an unintentional sexual stalemate.

Shaking her head, Rachel watched as Santana got up and started to get dressed for school. She'd been sleeping over at Rachel's house or the other way around since the attack. They'd tried sleeping apart, but the screaming nightmares Rachel had were so bad that it quickly became clear that there was no one but Santana who could help Rachel through the nights. They were under a strict no-locked-door policy. Besides, everyone was pretty sure sex was the last thing on the girls' minds…at least right now.

"Time to get up,  _querida_. Today's the day."

Rachel flopped back on the bed.

"Do I have to?"

She didn't want to be whiny, but she  _really_  didn't want to go back to school. Even what she sounded like now was a clear example of why: her voice was slightly husky, which appeared to be what she might sound like for the rest of her life. She hadn't tried singing yet, though the doctor assured her that it was quite possible that her speaking voice may have been the only thing affected. He said she was extremely lucky all the knife wounds were relatively shallow. They did not puncture any vital organs too deeply, and the scars should fade with time. He couldn't tell her much more about her voice. Mitchell had squeezed so hard – after already making some shallow cuts near her throat – that they had had to do surgery to open up her airway again. That meant that the doctors really had no idea how her singing would be affected.

And Rachel did not want to find out. Ever.

Santana crawled back onto the bed and pulled Rachel into her. She never crawled over the wounded diva anymore out of fear that being on top of her would frighten her. "Rach, you gotta go sometime. Come on. I'll be there with you the whole time, okay? And if you really can't take it, we'll split. You just say the word."

Rachel whispered, "What word?"

Santana smiled and dropped a kiss onto her head.

"How about we go with 'red light' just to make it easy?"

"Red light?"

"Well, I was going to go with 'boobies,' but I thought that might draw a little more attention to you than you'd want on your first day back."

She laughed out loud as Rachel smacked her in her shoulder and almost pushed her off the bed, huffing her way into the bathroom to finally get ready for school.

"So...was that a no to 'boobies?'"

* * *

The second Rachel and Santana entered the front doors of McKinley, everyone stopped and stared at them. Even people who weren't there that day knew what had happened at this point since Mitchell's arrest and subsequent jail time were highly publicized. However, this was the first time that Rachel had really been seen since the incident so the interest level was high.

"All right, people, move it along. Nothing to see here!" Santana snapped out.

Before the student body could take the hint, Santana's orders were quickly followed up.

"You heard her, move it! Anyone left standing and staring in the next 30 seconds will be covered in slushy by the end of the day. No exceptions!" This was barked out by Quinn, who stalked down the hall in her Cheerios outfit, in all her reigning HBIC glory. Brittany bounced along beside her, doing a passable imitation of a glare as well, surprisingly.

Not surprisingly, everyone scattered and disappeared in 15 seconds or less.

Santana chuckled and leaned against the lockers as Rachel gathered her things. Rachel smiled softly, not quite as brightly as usual, but definitely with more optimism than Santana expected for the start of the day.

"Thanks, Q. You saved me from having to knock some heads in this morning."

Quinn shrugged and smiled at the both of them while Brittany bounced over and squealed, "Rachie!"

Rachel barely had time to put her bag down and close her locker door before she had her arms full of the bubbly, blonde cheerleader.

"Oof, I'm happy to see you too, Britt. I do still need to breathe, though."

Brittany let go quickly and stepped back.

"Oh, sorry, Rachie. I just haven't seen you in a while, and I missed you. We all did."

As Brittany was speaking, more of the Glee Club started to walk up and join them at the lockers: First Kurt and Blaine, then Dave, followed by Mercedes and Puck and Sam, as well as Mike and Tina. Finn wasn't there, but he usually didn't pull himself out of bed and into school until right before the bell unless there was early morning football practice. Quinn noticed that Rachel was looking a little antsy as everyone was greeting her and asking her how she was. She noticed that Rachel kept reaching her hand up to rub at the scarf she had around her neck – a telling sign like a nervous habit. She glanced over at Santana and jerked her head in Rachel's direction, and Santana nodded.

"Okay, guys, well, I gots to get to class before Rach here calls me a slacker, but, you know, in more 'eloquent' words." Santana held her arm out for Rachel in a jokingly romantic gesture. Rachel's eyes showed the gratitude for the lifeline that her girlfriend was offering her. "Care to accompany me to class, my lady?" Santana lightly teased.

"Why, thank you,  _señorita._  I believe I will. See you all later at lunch or Glee practice?" Rachel asked, a little tentatively.

Everyone agreed right away. As Santana walked down the hall with Rachel's arm in hers, she glanced back and nodded in reassurance to all of their friends.  _That could have gone a whole lot worse,_ Santana thought.

* * *

_Yeah, remind me to never think those fucking words ever again._

Rachel was full-on  _freaking out_. Not a little bit freaking out, not a yellow light kind of freak out. Oh, no, this was all-out, red light, say the word "boobies" and then some kind of freaking the  _fuck_ out. Santana had no idea what to do, because she felt a little bit like she might start hyperventilating as well.

The day had been going pretty well. They'd done the morning introductions. They'd gotten through classes, together and separately, which Santana was really proud of Rachel for. They even got through a semi-awkward lunch where Finnept had come up and actually pulled his head far enough out of his ass to apologize to them.

He sounded a little like a kid with a stutter who had marbles in his mouth when he did it. He was all, "Uh…umm…yeah…ssss….sorry I was all…you know…and…yeah." Whatever, it was still the fucking funniest thing ever, and Rach was all like, "It's the thought that counts, Tana. I think we should all help to try and usher in a new era of peace" or what-the-fuck-ever, so Santana let it slide. She was going to continue to make fun of him in her head and behind his back. As long as she did her best to not mock him too much to his face, Rachel apparently considered that progress or something. She knew she couldn't expect miracles with Santana and Finn, not with the rocky history among the three of them.

So with lunch under their belts and more classes successfully completed, the only thing facing them was Glee. That shouldn't have been too bad, but Santana reallyshould have known better. Like, _really_ really.

_Okay, just think, Santana. You've handled worse than this. You can do this. You know what she's been through this last month. You were there with her every step of the way. You were there with her after the attack. You can do this. Man up, Lopez. Or, you know, woman up. Your girlfriend needs you right now. Don't be a pussy._

Rachel seemed fine. She'd been smiling a little more, even laughing a little. Not quite as strong as before the attack, obviously, but getting out of the house and being around all of their friends seemed to be helping. However, the second they walked into the choir room and Rachel stopped talking to Santana long enough to  _realize_  that was where they were, her entire body froze up.

"Rach?  _Hermosa_? You okay?" That was when Santana realized that Rachel was staring at one singular spot on the floor. The spot where she had crumpled to the ground after Dave and Puck had pulled Mitchell off of her. The one Santana had held her in, her blood pooling on the floor in an ever-widening circle as they waited for the ambulance to arrive.

Santana grasped Rachel's hands and tried to get her to look up and away from the floor, but it was as if she was in a bit of a catatonic state. She'd seen her like this once or twice. She knew the next stage wouldn't be pretty at all, particularly once the memories really started to take over. Santana quickly looked up and realized that more and more of their friends were coming into the choir room, laughing and talking, then growing quiet when they noticed Santana and Rachel standing there.

Puck spoke up as he stood by the chairs.

"Santana, do you need any help?"

Santana swallowed and shook her head slowly, glancing back at Rachel as she started to shiver.

"No, just keep back, okay? She can't take it if there are a lot of people around when this happens."

Puck nodded and gestured to the others to move back towards the door giving the two young women space.

_All right, that's taken care of. Here we go._

Santana reached forward and slowly rested her hands on each of her girlfriend's hands in the hope that Rachel wouldn't feel trapped. Rachel's trembling increased. She jerked her head up, not really seeing Santana in front of her.

"Rach? Baby girl, it's me. It's Santana. You're not back there, okay? He's not here, and it's not that day. Everything's fine. You're fine. I want you to feel my hands holding yours and look down again. See that the floor in front of you is blood-free, and so are you, right now, okay? Can you do that for me,  _hermosa_? Please?"

Santana said this all in a soothing whisper like they had practiced over and over again after Rachel had woken from a nightmare or had a flashback, which thankfully had lessened dramatically since the attack.

Rachel, hearing the soothing tones that Santana was using, finally focused on Santana's eyes. Then she slowly looked down at the floor. When she realized that there was indeed no blood there, she looked up again and stared down at her hands, which where tightly clasped in Santana's. She held the Latina's hands even tighter until her shaking stopped almost completely. Then Santana pulled her into a hug and expelled a relieved breath, inhaling the scent of her hair and listening to the sound of her love breathing against her.

"Tana?" Rachel asked in a small, raspy voice.

"Yeah, baby girl?" Santana whispered back into her hair.

"Can we just sit in the back row and listen to other people sing for today? And can you not let go of my hand?" Rachel sounded so small and innocent asking those things. Santana closed her eyes. She kept resisting the urge to go find Mitchell and try beating his head in again. That wouldn't help her girlfriend now. Now they had to be there for one another and try to move forward. That was the mantra Rachel's doctor and her therapist had been telling them for the last month.

"Sure, Rach. Let's go sit in the back, and you can get used to the singing and the room itself again, okay? Remember, it's just a room, and there are more good memories than bad here, right?"

Rachel nodded and even eked out a small smile. As they climbed to the back of the room and sat down, holding hands the entire time, Santana motioned for the rest of the Glee Club to join them. The Latina felt the constriction around her heart ease a little as well. Rachel was a fighter. She'd gotten through the past month. She'd get through this, and Santana would be there every step of the way.

* * *

The rest of the week went relatively well. Rachel was smiling and laughing a little more often, and she wasn't nearly as nervous to go to lunches or into the choir room as she was that first day back. However, she still insisted on wearing scarves every day, and she always sat in the back row at Glee. She also  _never_  sang.

It was her second week back to school when Santana finally decided to bring it up.

They were sitting in the back row of the choir room after Glee on Wednesday, and everyone had just filed out. Today they'd discussed Broadway shows. It was the  _perfect_  opening for Rachel to jump in and offer a comment or suggest singing something, especially with Nationals coming up. However, she didn't say a single thing. In fact, she continued to look as uninterested in Glee as she had the previous week, and Santana was getting really worried.

"Rach, I think we need to talk about your singing."

Rachel looked up from grabbing her bag to leave.

"What do we need to talk about?"

Santana blew out a frustrated breath. "Rachel, come on. You know what I mean."

Rachel furrowed her brow. "No, I really don't, Santana. There really is nothing to talk about. I won't be singing anymore. So there's nothing to talk about."

Santana sat in shock, her jaw dropped, as she stared at her girlfriend. "What the fuck do you mean, 'I won't be singing anymore'?"

"Just that."

Santana glared at Rachel. She was really starting to get mad. "This isn't funny, Rachel."

Rachel glared right back. "I know it's not, which is why I was pretty sure we weren't talking about it, Santana."

Santana furrowed her brows in confusion. "If you're not singing anymore – and let's put aside the fact that I don't know why the hell not for a second – why the fuck are you still coming to Glee practice?"

"To support you and all of our friends on your journey to Nationals, of course. I also want to be there for you when you get into Julliard. Though I doubt I will be going to New York now, I know you still have an excellent shot at it since I know your audition was amazing."

Now Santana was truly fucking pissed off. She hadn't been this mad since before she and Rachel had gotten back together. "You…I can't fucking believe you."

Rachel looked confused now. "What?"

Santana took a deep breath and went on. "The doctors, both your physical one and your therapist, told me to have patience with you, but this? This is the last straw, Rachel. I've fucking been with you through every single part of this. At no point,  _no point_ , did anyone tell you that you couldn't sing again. So fuck you. You're right. I'll probably get into Julliard. But fuck it if I'm going by myself, especially if you're not even going to fucking  _try_  to go after your dreams as well."

Rachel looked like she was getting angrier by the minute as well. "Fuck  _you_ , Santana! Do you not hear my voice right now? I sound like I smoke a pack of cigarettes a day. I can't go on Broadway like this. I mean, look at my neck!" She pulled off her scarf and revealed the small scars just under her chin that had been left as well as the long, thin scar down her throat where they had had to do surgery.

Santana shook her head. "Those scars are thin. The doctor told you himself that they will fade in a year, maybe two. Besides, with some stage makeup, they wouldn't be visible at all in the theater! And your voice? You don't know what it will sound like when you sing because you haven't tried! It's scratchy from disuse and the attack, but no one knows what it will sound like to sing until you _try_. What are you so afraid of?"

" _Losing everything!_ "

Santana jumped when Rachel shouted that, the words echoing around the choir room.

Rachel went on as tears streamed down her face. "Don't you get it, Santana? He didn't rape me that day, and he didn't kill me, but he may as well have! He came in here, and he cut my body, and he squeezed at my throat trying to take from me what I wouldn't give him, and he succeeded. He succeeded in taking away my voice, my drive, my ability to feel beautiful and desired enough to let my girlfriend  _touch_  me. What am I  _afraid_  of? I'm afraid of losing everything. If I don't try to sing, then maybe I can hold out hope that he truly didn't take that from me – that  _some_ part of me from before the attack still remains. But if I try and I c-can't? Then he succeeded. And I just… _can't_."

Santana swallowed hard and got up from her chair. She walked towards Rachel. She put her hand below the shorter girl's chin and tilted her head up, running her hand along the light scars on her neck, making Rachel shiver at her touch.

"Rach, there's no way he succeeded, because he wanted to rape you and possibly kill you, and you stopped him, okay? If you let the memory of what he did stop you from ever trying to sing or perform again, of stopping you from going after your dreams,  _then_  he wins. And fuck if we want to let him win, right, baby girl?"

Rachel let out a small, watery laugh at that.

"I know that you'll sing when you're ready, and I think it'll be sooner than you might think. And whatever the result, I want you to know that I love you no matter what. You are more than your voice. If you have to find another dream, then you will, okay? But we don't have to worry about that bridge until we cross it."

Rachel nodded shakily and Santana went on.

"And Rachel Barbra Berry? Make no mistake, I find every single part of you fucking  _delectable_. So when you're ready, I'm all about making love to you until we break whatever surface we find to have sex on, all right? Rest assured, even your scars are a turn-on. After all, you're the one who told me scars are sexy when you found that one on my lower back from falling out of Britt's treehouse when I was eight."

Santana leaned in and placed the softest, most heartfelt kiss on Rachel's lips, tasting her cherry ChapStick mixing with her tears and the flavor that was uniquely Rachel.

The kiss heated up quickly, but they both knew that Rachel was not ready for this yet, especially not in the choir room. Santana pulled back slowly, and Rachel nestled her head into her shoulder. They just stayed like that until both of them were calm enough to head home.

* * *

The day this started to truly improve seemed like any other. It was the Friday after their argument, two days later, and everyone was goofing around in Glee before the weekend.

Puck had Brittany on his back, piggyback style, and they were spinning around the room, because she wanted to see what the world looked like to carousels. Puck just shrugged and agreed, because why not?

Artie was off chatting with Finn. Sam and Mercedes were flirting shamelessly as were Quinn and Joe. Kurt and Rachel were chatting it up like gossip was a source of nourishment. This left Mike and Tina practicing some dance moves together in the corner while Sugar filed her nails and read a magazine. Santana, Dave, and Blaine were chatting about, of all things, the songs they wanted to sing. Santana had a plan for Glee today. Yeah, yeah, she seemed to do the romantic-songs-in-Glee thing a lot lately, but this was for a good cause, so fuck off. She'd recruited Dave and Blaine to help.

Finally, Mr. Schue walked in, late as usual, and clapped his hands together, "All right, guys. So today I asked you to come up with some ideas for solos for Nationals. What do you got?"

Santana stood up, as did Dave and Blaine, and they headed to the front of the room. "I got something, Mr. Schue. Dave here and Warbler are going to help me out."

"You have the floor, Santana."

Rachel looked a little surprised, as did Kurt. They both stopped talking and sat up straighter.

"So this is something I started preparing shortly after your attack, Rach. I asked Blaine and Dave to help out because they know you really well, and because it just seemed fitting. I wasn't sure when I wanted to sing this to you, but after…" She took a deep breath. "After our talk on Wednesday, I thought you finally needed to hear this. Here goes."

_When you try your best, but you don't succeed_ _  
_ _When you get what you want, but not what you need_  
When you feel so tired, but you can't sleep  
Stuck in reverse

_And the tears come streaming down your face  
When you lose something you can't replace  
When you love someone, but it goes to waste  
Could it be worse?_  
 __  
Lights will guide you home  
And ignite your bones  
And I will try to fix you

_And high up above or down below_   
_When you're too in love to let it go_   
_But if you never try, you'll never know_   
_Just what you're worth_

__**Lights will guide you home**  
And ignite your bones  
And I will try to fix you 

_**Tears stream down your face** _   
_**When you lose something you cannot replace** _   
_**Tears stream down your face** _   
_**And I...** _

_**Tears stream down your face** _   
_**I promise you I will learn from my mistakes** _   
_**Tears stream down your face** _   
_**And I...** _

_Lights will guide you home_   
_And ignite your bones_   
_And I will try to fix you_

By the end of the song, Rachel was openly crying. So was Santana and a number of the other people in the choir room, even the guys – though they would never admit to that. She'd barely finished singing before Rachel jumped up and flung herself into Santana's arms.

"Thank you," she whispered into Santana's ear.

Santana smiled and kissed her forehead softly. "You don't ever have to thank me for loving you,  _hermosa_."

Rachel sniffed and pulled back far enough to glance at Dave and Blaine. "Well then, thank  _you_ , boys."

Dave shrugged. "You're welcome, Rachel. You were there for me when I needed it most. I thought it was only right that I return the favor."

Blaine nodded. "Besides, I'm pretty sure that Kurt is impressed by my supportive friend gesture as well as my singing skills. So you know that this might get me lucky tonight. That, according to Santana, was really the only reason we should help her out with this, right, you Latina lover?"

Santana laughed out loud and Rachel just shook her head, feeling like Santana was indeed fixing her more and more every day. In fact, ever since their fight on Wednesday, she'd been dancing around this one idea and Santana's courage today finally solidified the decision for her in her mind.

Once Glee was done, Rachel grabbed Santana's hand and instead of heading straight to the parking lot, she led them to the auditorium. Santana seemed confused, but she followed along, too happy to see that Rachel wasn't avoiding this performance space any longer to argue.

Rachel sat Santana down in one of the chairs and then slowly approached the stage. She turned around and faced Santana and said, "You told me on Wednesday that Mitchell would only succeed if I never tried. Today, you showed me again that you are with me every step of the way helping me to try to move forward. I don't want him to win, Tana. I don't, which is why I'm going to try right now with only you in this empty auditorium where my NYADA audition should have taken place that day for an audience. Okay?" At Santana's nod of reassurance, Rachel began.

It was hard. Oh, it was so very,  _very_  hard. She started out much lower than she would have normally, much shakier. She was definitely pitchy and off-key.

But gradually, slowly, as her throat loosened and she began to lose herself in the music, she started to sound like  _herself_  again. Pretty soon, she stopped thinking altogether, and she simply sang.

_When the rain is blowing in your face_   
_And the whole world is on your case_   
_I could offer you a warm embrace_   
_To make you feel my love_

_When the evening shadows and the stars appear_   
_And there is no one there to dry your tears_   
_I could hold you for a million years_   
_To make you feel my love_

_I know you haven't made your mind up yet_   
_But I would never do you wrong_   
_I've known it from the moment that we met_   
_No doubt in my mind where you belong_

_I'd go hungry; I'd go black and blue_   
_I'd go crawling down the avenue_   
_No, there's nothing that I wouldn't do_   
_To make you feel my love_

_The storms are raging on the rolling sea_   
_And on the highway of regret_   
_The winds of change are blowing wild and free_   
_You ain't seen nothing like me yet_

_I could make you happy, make your dreams come true_   
_Nothing that I wouldn't do_   
_Go to the ends of the Earth for you_   
_To make you feel my love_   
_To make you feel my love_

It was far from perfect. Her voice cracked, and she cried for much of the song. There were times where she took breaths that she wouldn't have normally, but oh, it was so very  _real_  and  _alive_. She poured all the emotion and love she had for Santana into her singing. In the end, she knew that the love was there burning in every single word she sang.

When she opened her eyes, Santana was there climbing the stairs and sweeping her up into her arms. They were kissing furiously and laughing and crying. There were almost no words for the joy that they were feeling in that moment. She'd done it. It wasn't how she'd sounded before the attack, and maybe it never would be. But with practice and with time, her voice would still be an amazingly beautiful, perhaps even stronger for the hardships that Rachel had experienced to keep on singing and keep on dreaming her dreams. All they really knew now, though, is that Santana and Rachel were there, together, no longer looking back, but moving forward.

* * *

Additional author's note: The two songs used are  _Fix You_  by Coldplay and Adele's cover of Bob Dylan's  _Make You Feel My Love_. I know these were both done on  _Glee_  before now. I did love Matthew Morrison's rendition of  _Fix You_ , but I thought it worked so well for Santana to sing this to Rachel in this chapter for its message. Additionally, the way that Lea Michele sang  _Make You Feel My Love_ in the tribute episode was so beautiful and heartbreaking that I thought it was perfect for this moment. I hope you all enjoyed this chapter and that I did it my year off justice. I'm glad to be back, and I promise not to delay the next chapter as long (or not long at all, if you're a new reader).


	17. “Lighten with Dawn”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Disclaimer: Much to my chagrin, Glee is not at all my property. I have no money; please don’t sue me, because I enjoy taking these characters for a spin!
> 
> Author’s note: Well, now, at least this time I posted this chapter within the same year! It has been longer than I would have liked, but I have not been idle. I hope you all enjoy the continuation of this story. I know I still have my ideas about where I want it to go, and trust me: I already have the ending in mind. There will most likely be two more chapters and an epilogue, which will be of some length itself, not just a cop-out. This means there should be 20 chapters total. That’s the plan anyway.
> 
> As some of you may have noticed, I posted a stand-alone JulyBerry fic earlier today, so please have a read if that is something you’re interested in.
> 
> I wanted to take a minute to thank you all on fanfiction.net and AO3 for supporting this story, despite my rather lax updating the last year or more. Life tries to take over, and then I get a nice review or someone telling me that they want to know how it ends, and I am once again reminded that people love these characters as much as I do. Thank you for continuing to read and review. Your interest in my writing means the world to me.

* * *

This was just totally unfair. Santana was positive that, as a lesbian, she would not have to go through all of this ridiculous Prom-crap. Of course, she had to be dating one of those girls for whom it actually meant way more than she ever would have said. Okay, so maybe Santana had stood in front of her mother’s mirror with Quinn and Brittany as a little girl and pretended to be named Prom Queen, and maybe she’d tried to win this stupid thing just to get one over on Quinn last year, but it _totally_ didn’t mean that much to her.

_Sure, Santana, that’s why you made sure to pick out the perfect dress. Just so everything can go perfectly for your girlfriend. You obviously don’t care at all about your Senior Prom._

Rolling her eyes at her own ridiculousness, Santana closed the closet door on her sexy-as-sin dress (red, of course). She hoped to God that Rachel wouldn’t decide to go snooping in the back for some reason.

It had been two weeks since Rachel first sang for Santana. And with her crazy dedication, she hadn’t done much else. In fact, Santana wasn’t even sure that Rachel remembered that Prom _was_ tomorrow night. She’d checked with Kurt to see if her girlfriend had mentioned anything to him, but all Kurt knew was that Rachel was completely obsessed with her planned meeting with Madame Tibideaux – the woman she was auditioning for to get into NYADA – the day of the attack. That was happening today via a group road trip that they were all taking to Columbus.

No matter. With Kurt’s help (he insisted), she had picked out the perfect Senior Prom dress for her girlfriend. Everything was in place for a night out to forget about everything – pending college acceptances, auditions, attacks, Nationals, graduation – and just be the young and in-love teenagers that they were.

They all just had to survive a two-hour car ride (one-way) with a nervous Rachel Barbra Berry long enough to _make_ it to Senior Prom tomorrow night.

* * *

“Okay, that’s it! Stop the car!” They didn’t make it further than five minutes outside the “Thank you for visiting Lima, Ohio!” sign.

Dave quirked an eyebrow, but he nodded his head and pulled the van off the road at Santana’s request.

Once the car was off, he and Sebastian turned around from their places in the front. Kurt and Blaine, in the far back seats, leaned forward. Even Rachel, who was sitting next to Santana, turned to look at her girlfriend in surprise.

“What is it? Did you forget something, Tana?”

“Did I forget something?! No! I’m just trying to figure out where my neurotic girlfriend from the past two weeks has gone!”

At Rachel’s look, Santana went on. “Baby, I love you, but you’ve been freaked out about preparing for this meeting with this Carmen woman all week. And when you finally get to the day of, you’re as cool as a cucumber. You haven’t made one Diva request since we got in the car, and I came fully prepared to calm you down!”

Sebastian snickered. “She even made a list for all of us to study ahead of time. It was quite comprehensive.”

Dave smacked his shoulder, but not fast enough.

“Santana Marie Lopez! Let me see this list.”

Santana grumbled and glared at Sebastian, but she handed it over. Rachel scanned her eyes over the paper. As she did, she read aloud.

“One: Thermos of hot water with lemon to relax Rachel’s throat before singing. Two: Scented compress to be interchanged between eyes and throat depending on preference in case she wants to sleep in the car. Three: Back-ups of all potential song options from the last few years in Glee in case she changes her mind about her song choice. Four: Bring recordings _and_ sheet music, just in case. Five: American Express from parents in the event that we haven’t planned for everything else. Six: Breathe, Tana.”

Santana had been cringing while Rachel was reading out her list. But at the newly added sixth note, Rachel took her finger and tilted Santana’s chin up. Rachel laughed softly at the look of trepidation on the Latina’s face.

“Santana, _querida_ , I’m fine. I needed to go overboard the last two weeks because I hadn’t sung for over a month before that, not to mention continuing to recover from what was done to my throat in the attack. I wanted to make sure auditioning for NYADA is even something I thought I could still do. Now, we’re here, and there is no point in worrying anymore. I think it’s absolutely adorable that you went to all this trouble for me, but I think we should all take this time to try to relax before we get there. Don’t you?”

Blaine laughed and Kurt piped up from the back. “I think hell just froze over.   _Rachel_ just told _Santana_ to relax about something involving singing.”

Santana slung her arm around her girlfriend’s shoulder and settled down more fully in the seat. “Yeah, yeah, hush up, Hummel. All right, what are we all just sitting here for? Let’s get this show on the road! Start the van and drive, Dave!”

Dave turned around, and everyone got comfortable as they once again took off towards Columbus. Only Rachel heard Santana whisper, “And I am _not_ adorable.”

She just smiled and pulled her extremely considerate and loving – but definitely not adorable – girlfriend even closer into her side, trying to take her own advice and remain calm on their drive towards the unknown.

* * *

The meeting with Carmen? It did not go well. _At all._ At any other time, Dave and Sebastian would have had to hold Santana back. But because Rachel could barely hold herself together, Santana knew that her girlfriend needed her to be there for her. In the end, holding Rachel’s hand until they got back to the car was more important than punching Madame Tibideaux in her smug face, as satisfying as that would have felt.

It didn’t matter the reasons that Rachel gave her for not being at her original audition. All Carmen Tibideaux saw was another student who had choked and failed to show up to an audition. If Rachel couldn’t make it to the first one, couldn’t meet her commitments, what guarantee was there that she would ever follow through on any of her other commitments at NYADA? There were too many other students who _had_ managed to make it to the first audition, including Kurt on that same day, and that was more than enough evidence for Madame Tibideaux that they had more drive than Rachel did. She didn’t let Rachel, or anyone else, get more than two words out, and she left after giving her final word on the matter. No other students get special treatment, because they couldn’t remember to show up for the audition to NYADA. Neither would Rachel. No second audition would be offered.

They all piled into the van in complete silence, except for the sound of Rachel’s sobs as she cried out her wasted dreams into Santana’s neck. Santana held her close and seethed in silence. Venting her frustration would do no good now; it would only hurt her girlfriend more. What Rachel needed now was just to be held, to try to forget this shitty day, and then to try to enjoy the celebrations they did have coming up. Like prom. However, it soon became clear that Rachel was going to start hyperventilating if they didn’t stop to rest soon.

“Dave, bro, can you pull the van over for minute?”

Dave nodded and everyone climbed out. Santana turned Rachel towards her and looked into her bloodshot, tear-filled eyes, “Baby. _Hermosa,_ you have to take a deep breath. If you keep breathing like this, you know that you’ll end up making yourself sick.” Rachel nodded shakily, and Santana placed her hand on her heart. “Feel the way my heart is beating. Feel my chest rise and fall. Breathe in and out, love. Everything is fine; everything will be fine, okay? You’re safe. You’re safe with me.”

Rachel nodded and said, “O-okay. I know. I believe you, Tana. I always believe you, because nothing would dare stand in your way.”

Santana laughed softly and hugged Rachel tighter. “Damn right. Now, we’re going to go inside and get a room or two at this motel – with the handy American Express I brought along for any emergencies like this – and then we’re going to grab some food, okay? Things will look better after that, babe.”

Rachel nodded, and they climbed out while letting the others know the plan. While Santana went inside and rented the room (one large one for all six of them with two beds and a pull out, because there was no way they could explain any other accommodations to their otherwise understanding parents), the others went to grab some food. They managed to find a place that served some salads and other vegan friendly options for Rachel. By the time they all met up, everyone gladly sat around their room and dug into their late lunch/early dinner. The meeting with Carmen, though shorter than they would have liked, had taken a lot more out of all of them than they realized.

They’d stay the night, then start back early first thing the next day getting back well in time for prom. After eating, Sebastian and Kurt worked on homework together, while Dave studied for his finals and a few of the plays for the final game he had coming up. Rachel was exhausted from her crying session earlier. She passed out on the bed next to Santana who was flipping through channels on the television. After a decent length of time and a pointed look at the guys to not ask questions, Santana slipped off the bed and out the door. Rachel was fast asleep using a pillow as a cuddle substitute.

* * *

Santana found Madame Tibideaux in the same auditorium where they had met up with her a couple of hours earlier. She’d done some research on the woman well in advance of this drive to Columbus. So she knew that their first attempt might not go over so well. Santana had great faith in her girlfriend’s abilities. When Rachel put her mind to something, she almost always got it done. However, the trick was getting that first word in with Madame Tibideaux. When she felt like she had been snubbed, the rumor was that she was not easily pacified. Thus, they went to Columbus with Rachel’s Plan A.

Santana went with her Plan B. She _always_ had a Plan B. You don’t become Second in Command of the Unholy Trinity without one.

She knew that if their first meeting had failed, Carmen Tibideaux would be around the rest of the day in Columbus watching auditions before she went back to New York. This is why Santana had returned, alone, to speak with her.

“Her heart stopped.”

Carmen glanced up from her notes after her final audition for the afternoon. There was just enough confusion on her face for Santana to continue on before she could be interrupted. “I’ve never told her. No one has. There was never really any point. She survived, she healed, and she’s come back stronger than ever. But the day of the NYADA auditions, when everything was finally coming together, Rachel’s entire world fell apart. All of ours did for a little while.”

When it didn’t look like Madame Tibideaux was planning on saying anything yet, Santana kept going.

“Rachel was going to come here and sing for you – show you that she could make it into NYADA on her voice alone. I know she can do that, but I also knew ahead of time that you might not let her get in a word first, ‘cause you have hard and fast rules, and you don’t do exceptions. Ever.

“But that day? Audition day? Her heart stopped. Some asshole felt threatened by her, by our relationship, and cornered her. He stabbed her and choked the life out of her until she had to fear that she might never sing again. Just before the ambulance got there that day, her heart just…gave out.” Santana took a deep, fortifying breath. “They got it going again. But for those few seconds? Every person you saw here today with Rachel – and so many others – our hearts stopped too. That girl is so much more than her voice. But when she sings? Words can’t describe it. I love singing, but Rachel _lives_ to sing. I don’t think she deserves special treatment. All I’m asking is that you understand that nothing in the world would have kept her from that audition – kept her from her chance at NYADA – except something so unthinkable…something so…unimaginable…”

Santana finally focused once again on Carmen Tibideaux’s face, and saw that she was looking straight at Santana, completely focused on every word, though her face remained unreadable. Santana laughed slightly uncomfortably.

“It used to be a joke when we’d say things like. ‘Rachel Berry’s voice would have to stop working or her heart would have to stop beating before she missed an audition.’ No one was laughing when it happened for real. All I’m asking, Madame Tibideaux, is that you give her the chance to show you what she was born to do. We have our Show Choir Nationals coming up in a week, and I have a ticket reserved for you to watch her perform. Please, just think about it.”

Santana didn’t even give her time to respond. She just turned on her heel and walked out of the auditorium. She’d said her piece. The rest was out of her hands.

Luckily, when she got back to the motel room, Rachel was still passed out wrapped around the hotel pillow like a koala. The others had known what Santana was going to attempt if Plan A was not successful. So they shot her questioning looks when she returned. She shrugged her shoulders. They nodded in resigned understanding. As Santana crawled into bed and replaced the pillow with her own body in Rachel’s arms (“mmmuhm…Tana…sleepy…cmre…warm…lovely’”), she really hoped that something good would come out of this trip. For now, she shushed Rachel as she kissed the top of her head and pulled her even closer and drifted off to sleep to the sound of Sebastian snickering in the background while Dave shushed him, and Kurt and Blaine discussed which couple was going to have to sleep on the pull-out couch. Ten bucks said Sebastian was going to end up on the pull-out. He couldn’t help himself. He’d say something snide that would land him and Dave there for the night.

* * *

The next evening, they all prepared for Prom in their respective homes. The drive back hadn’t been too bad. Sebastian was cranky, because he’d, in fact, had to sleep on the floor. He’d been so snide that even Dave was annoyed with him and refused to let him share the couch bed with him. Santana laughed so hard she was in tears when she saw – no, almost tripped – on him on her way to the bathroom in the morning, and the two of them had been going at each other ever since. Suffice to say, Dave and Rachel had their hands full trying to control the both of them.

Rachel was feeling a little better. She’d already come up with three to five different options for where she could go in New York for singing, including still waiting to hear from the number of backup colleges that she’d applied to with Santana. There was always the no-college-at-all option. Neither her parents nor Santana were thrilled with that one. But it was true that if she simply went to audition after audition right when they got to New York, she could get lucky. Santana was simply nodding along and agreeing a lot with whatever Rachel had to say for now since she didn’t want to get Rachel’s hopes up by mentioning her visit with Madame Tibideaux. They’d both just have to wait to see what their hard work had accomplished. In the meantime, everyone seemed determined to enjoy Prom tonight. That was all that mattered for now.

All of this flashed through Santana’s head as she pulled up in the limo in front of Rachel’s house. Dave and Sebastian were sitting across from her, looking positively dashing, and Kurt and Blaine sat along the side.

“Santana, honey, you might want to take a few deep breaths. You look like you’re gonna pass out any second.” Kurt leaned forward and patted her knee.

“Yeah, San, green really kinda clashes with the red of your dress. So you might want to stop looking so sick in the face. Unless you’re going for that whole ‘Christmas color’ look?” That pearl of wisdom was from her usually supportive friend Dave.

Blaine handed her a bottle of water that was part of the limo’s stash and said, “Do you not want to do this? Do you want me to call Rachel and have her come out here?”

When Santana still hadn’t responded and still looked a little sick, a source of support came from a place it very rarely did.

“Santana Lopez. Take as deep a breath as you can in that tight-ass dress you’re wearing. Careful, though, you don’t want the ‘girls’ to spill out the top. Not that that would do much for the crowd in this limo right now.” Santana glared at Sebastian as he smirked at her. However, he followed it up with his version of an oddly supportive smile. “Girl, you look fabulous, and she’s going to have an amazing time. Everyone knows you two are together, and no one cares. You two are the reason Kurt and Blaine and Dave and I can even go to Prom together without feeling like we’ll be shunned. You’ll _both_ have the Senior Prom you’ve always dreamed of, okay?”

Santana gave him a look of surprise and then a firm nod of acceptance. “Good. Now you need to get your hot ass out of this car and go _get_ the girl you plan to bring to Prom, so that all of that can actually happen, idiot.”

Santana rolled her eyes, laughed, and got out of the limo. Just as she was about to close the door, she tossed back, “Yeah, yeah, I’m going. Thanks for the pep talk, O.W. You always know when to be just the right amount of asshole.”

Santana could hear the laughter inside the limo as she walked up to Rachel’s door and rang the bell. She straightened out her dress and looked herself over one last time to make sure nothing was out of place. She had on her floor-length red dress with the single strap over one shoulder in an asymmetric neckline, and her silver pumps to match Rachel’s dress, which she’d picked out a few weeks ago. In fact, she’d had it delivered in a box that afternoon along with a note saying: “Hope you didn’t think I’d forget. See you tonight at your front door. Be ready at 6:00 P.M. Love you. – Santana”

Santana _really_ hoped that Rachel wasn’t pissed. Her girlfriend was a fan of big, romantic gestures, but she also liked to be prepared for all eventualities. This last minute Prom invite? Could go either way.

All of Santana’s worrying screeched to a halt the moment that the front door opened. Rachel was _gorgeous_! She was fully dressed for Prom in the white/peach floor-length, strapless dress that Santana had purchased for her with her matching heels just peeking out as she shifted slightly. Her hair was down and flowed freely around her shoulders. Oddly enough it matched extremely well with Santana’s hairstyle of choice for the night, which was mostly down with the front part pulled back and wrapped around her head in a braid/up-do of sorts. Kurt called it “artfully messy,” and Santana knew Rachel would call it “sexily messy.” Whatever you called it, it worked, and they could not have looked more perfect together for their Senior Prom if they had tried.

Rachel’s breath had caught in her throat when she saw Santana, and the smile on her face was radiant. “Santana…I…you look stunning. How did you plan this without me noticing?”

“Rach, baby girl, you haven’t noticed anything but practicing for the last few weeks.” At Rachel’s stricken look, Santana quickly said, “That’s not a bad thing, you should have been solely focused on that. It just made it really easy to surprise you. I’m actually really relieved. If you’d realized sooner that I hadn’t said anything about Senior Prom, I think I would have been in the doghouse for, at least, a couple of weeks. This way, you got to focus on one thing, and I got to distract myself with another. And, _Dios mio, hermosa_ , what a distraction! You look _muy deliciosa_. Do you like the dress and shoes?”

Rachel twirled and laughed at the same time. “Do I _like_ them?! Santana Marie Lopez. I _love_ them. They’re perfect, and so are you. That dress looks absolutely divine on you. Thank you for knowing how to make the perfect night for me.”

“Oh, on that note, hold your hand out and close your eyes.”

Rachel looked skeptical, but she did as she was told and gasped as she felt Santana slip a corsage on her wrist. She opened her eyes and it, too, was perfect: white flowers that matched everything about her dress. She started to tear up. Santana wiped one away and joked, “None of that, Rach. You don’t want to ruin your makeup before we even get to the Prom, now, do you?”

Rachel laughed softly, shook her head, and pulled Santana in for a deep, passionate kiss filled with as much emotion as she could in that moment.

“I know we have to go, or we’ll be late to a dinner I assume you have planned as well. Just know this. Later tonight, I’m going to be spending a lot of time showing you just how much this night means to me, and _exactly_ how gorgeous I think you look in that dress.”

Dave couldn’t stop laughing at the slightly flustered look Santana had on her face all the way to dinner.

Dinner was lovely, though everyone was so excited that they rushed through it much faster than they would have otherwise. When they finally arrived at Prom, it was even more fun than any of them had imagined. Of course they sang on and off in different groups for the dance itself since Mr. Schue had offered the Glee Club’s services once again, but they all made sure to make time for one another.

Puck danced with Brittany and then traded places so that he could dance with his favorite “Jewish Princess” while Santana and Britt danced with one another. Kurt and Blaine traded partners with each other at one point, and the irony of this moment – a year after the last Prom where Kurt tried to get Dave to dance with him – was not lost on any of them. Quinn and Joe were dancing with one another, though last Rachel had heard that was more of a friendship than anything else. Tina and Mike and Mercedes and Sam were also hitting the floor in turns. Artie had decided to go stag with Rory and Finn. The three of them were “bro-ing it up” and dancing with the girls in the Glee club who wanted to dance with them in turns.

At one point, Rachel found herself seated alone at the table while Santana went to grab them some drinks. Some of the guys were singing on the stage, and Rachel couldn’t remember the last time she’d had so much fun. She was startled out of her thoughts as she was tapped on the shoulder.

“Quinn? Are you enjoying yourself?”

Quinn smiled tentatively and nodded, then motioned to the chair next to Rachel.

“Do you mind?” Rachel shook her head, and Quinn sat down.

They sat in silence for a few minutes when Quinn finally spoke. “I didn’t think you guys would last. I thought for sure that it would be over before we could even blink, that Santana was just rebounding after Brittany even if she did say she was in love with you. But then it was months later, and you guys were still going strong. She is so much happier than she’s ever been before, even with Britt. Then you got attacked, and Rachel…I’ve never seen her so scared. I’ve known Santana for many years. I know more than most people about the secrets in her life. The same goes for her about me. But the look in her eyes as she held you that day? I knew that you were it for her.”

At Rachel’s confused look, Quinn pushed on. “What I mean by all of this is that I would like us to get to know one another better. _Really_ do that. Santana is my best friend, and God knows I’ve let her down the last couple of years. We’ve let each other down, but I want to be a better friend. A better person. You obviously mean a lot to her, and I realized that day that you mean more to me, as a person, than I previously realized. Life is too short to miss out on friendships because we’re being petty. I know I’ve been working on defending you the last couple of weeks, but I wanted to ask you face to face: can we start over again? Can we try our hand at a friendship, Rachel? I’ll be going to New Haven for college since I got into Yale, but that isn’t far from New York. It would be nice to know that we could try to all be there for one another.”

During her speech, Santana came up behind Quinn and was waiting to see if she needed to intervene. However, Rachel subtly shook her head and took one of Quinn’s hands in hers. “Quinn, I’ve wanted nothing more than to be your friend over the years. It took a series of odd meetings for me and Tana to realize that appearances are not always what they seem. I think if we can find love after all of that, you and I can most definitely find friendship. I know Santana would like to know that she will have your friendship when we move as well. Right, baby?”

“About time, Q. I thought I’d have to kick some sense into your ass.”

Quinn spun around and shot a not very convincing glare between Santana and Rachel. Santana sat down next to Rachel and took her hand, and Quinn just laughed. With that seemingly decided to all of their satisfaction for now, they started to discuss all the different options for the year ahead of them as well as the upcoming Nationals hurdle they had to get through before they could even graduate.

There were a couple of taps on the microphone, and everyone’s heads turned to the stage. Principal Figgins realized the focus was officially on him. He stumbled as he announced, “It is time to crown the King and Queen of the Senior Prom. At the request of many of the Juniors and Seniors, I will now hand this mic – and the stage – over to two thirds of the ‘Unholy Trinity:’ Quinn Fabray and Brittany S. Pierce.”

Rachel and Santana looked at Quinn with surprise. They watched as she took the stage with Brittany. Quinn looked out at the crowd and said, “When the time came this year for the nomination of Senior Prom King and Queen, the Prom committee was going to go about it the same way it always does. However, a couple of Cheerios approached me with an idea. Then a few people from Glee approached Brittany. When we both sat down and discussed it at lunch one day, this was the result.”

Quinn looked to Brittany, who smiled, and said, “After those first discussions, we took a secret petition around the entire high school. Outwardly, we announced that there would be no King and Queen for Prom this year, due to too much controversy from last year. However, we are now ready to reveal the results of our petition.”

“This year, by a landslide as well as almost the entire school requesting this very thing, we are proud to announce our Senior Class Royalty,” Quinn went on. “I’m not sure how we managed to keep it a secret from you both this entire time, but it was probably mostly due to how terrifying I am. All I know is that there aren’t many ways that we could show you two how much we appreciate you, or how much you have shown us all that we can overcome anything, if we only put our minds – and our hearts – all in. To this year’s Senior Prom Queens of McKinley High, Santana Lopez and Rachel Berry, I just want to say thank you. Thank you for showing us every day what it means to be fearless leaders.”

Santana and Rachel sat, frozen, throughout the entire speech. They couldn’t move. They were in shock. Brittany piped up, “Uh, guys, you might want to get up here soon before Quinn forgets that being nice is bad for her rep and steals these crowns from you. It’s entirely possible that could happen at any moment, but I’m totally ready to tackle her if she tries it.” This brought a lot of laughter from all over the gym, even from Quinn, and Santana finally stood up and headed for the stage with Rachel’s hand clasped firmly in hers.

Once they were crowned, Quinn and Brittany began to sing _Take My Breath Away_ by Berlin as the two girls had their dance.

“Hey, you’re not going to cry on me, are you, _hermosa?_ ”

Rachel shook her head as tears pooled in her eyes. “No. I just…why would they do this for us, Santana? I thought…I thought we were barely tolerated, and only then because Quinn and Brittany and you bullied everyone into it.”

“I’m just as surprised as you, Rach. But I think your attack shocked a lot more people at this school than we all realized. I think maybe--I don’t know. Maybe they see more of themselves in you and me than they ever have, and…”

“And maybe they took a positive way of showing that, for once?” Rachel looked as skeptical as Santana did, but no one had thrown any blood on them yet, a la _Carrie_. They were going to enjoy this moment for all it was worth. Rachel smiled, wrapped her arms around Santana’s shoulders, and kept swaying to the music as she listened to her girlfriend softly sing along to the lyrics that the rest of the Unholy Trinity were singing on stage in her ear.

_Take my breath away…”_

* * *

Rachel took Santana’s breath away in all the right ways later that night as she threw her up against the door of the hotel room they were staying in. Rachel kissed down Santana’s jaw and found the place right below her ear, along her jugular, which always got her to moan before the Latina even knew what was happening.

“Rach…baby girl… _Dios_ that feels fucking amazing…We don’t have to do this if you’re not…not ready yet…”

Rachel pulled back and looked into Santana’s eyes.

“ _Querida_ , I rented the room tonight when I saw the dress you got me. Trust me, if I wasn’t ready, we wouldn’t be here right now, okay? I’ve wanted to rip that dress off of you the moment I saw it _on_ you. So please, _por el amor de Dios_ , can we stop talking and start fucking?!” She punctuated this with a hard push of her knee up between Santana’s legs, which caused both girls to moan loudly.

Santana chuckled breathlessly. “Ha, Rachel Berry is telling _me_ she wants to stop talking? Well, all right then, have at it, babe. I’m all yours.”

At those words, Rachel stepped back and whispered, “Strip. Slowly.”

Santana nodded and undid her dress in the back, then let it slip down her body to pool on the floor. She stood in front of Rachel in nothing but her red lace thong for a minute while the other girl caught her breath and took her all in. “God, Santana. You’re so beautiful.”

Rachel smiled as she noticed Santana try not to blush. She took her hand and sat her down on the edge of the bed, facing her. “I’m going to strip for you, Tana, because I never feel more perfect than when I see myself through your eyes. Like I was never slushied or the attack never happened. I want you to sit there and watch, okay?”

Santana nodded, and Rachel’s dress followed Santana’s in a puddle of satin and silk on the hotel floor. She stood in the middle of the room in a white lacy thong. Instead of standing awkwardly or self-consciously, she seemed to grow even more confident as she _sauntered_ over to where Santana sat on the bed. Rachel slowly slipped off her thong. As Santana caught her breath in an audible moan, Rachel straddled her lap and pulled the Latina into a dizzying, passionate kiss.

Rachel pushed Santana gently back onto the bed and rested more fully on her thighs. “I tried to think of all the ways I might be comfortable for us to touch each other again, Tana. But I finally realized that it was about my body being touched. That was the real issue. God, I could touch you…” She demonstrated and licked her fingertip, running it along Santana’s right nipple, which made her girlfriend arch and cry out. “I could touch you all the time and be completely okay with it as I’m sure you will be.” Santana nodded frantically. “My body, as you know, has had some problems with touch since the attack. So I thought it would be the best idea to put what I love touching right in front of my eyes, while I took matters into my own hands, at least initially.”

Santana looked confused at first. However, as Rachel sucked her own fingers deep into her mouth and pulled them out to run them down her own body, Santana understood. “Holy fuck! Are you going to fuck yourself in front of me, Rach?”

Rachel smirked. “Not in front of you, Tana. _On_ you.”

They moaned simultaneously as Rachel ran the thumb of one of her hands lightly over her clit and trailed the fingers of her other hand through her pussy lips. She was already started to drip down onto Santana’s stomach. The sights and sounds were driving Santana insane with lust. She was so horny her own thong was definitely ruined by now and then some.

“Mmmh…Oh, fuck…yes, Tana, it feels so good. God, I’m really wet. Can you feel it, baby?”

“Fuck, baby girl, you’re all over my fucking stomach. Of course I can feel it.”

“Do you like it, Tana? Do you like how I look with my fingers inside of my wet pussy, fucking myself on top of you, dripping for you, thinking about you doing this to me?”

Santana was almost in agony with how much she wanted to have Rachel, but she wouldn’t touch her girlfriend unless the brunette said it was okay. This was just pure torture, though, as she watched Rachel add another finger, fucking herself with two of her fingers while her thumb danced across her clit.

“Fuck, you know I love it, _hermosa_. But I would fucking love it even more if I could be licking you all up right now. God, you’re dripping down the sides of my stomach, baby girl, and it’s so fucking hot.”

Rachel shakily nodded as she moved on her fingers more and more, rocking her body into Santana’s stomach.

“Do it.”

Santana jerked her head up and away from watching where Rachel was rocking against her.

“What?”

“Fuck me, Santana. However you want. I know you’ll be gentle with me, that you love me, and you’re not him. I just need you. Please, I need you so badly.”

That was all Santana needed to hear. In an almost singular move that was far smoother than she anticipated, she slid Rachel up her body, practically tore off her own ruined-anyway thong, and spun Rachel around. Before she went to town on the pussy she’d been salivating over, she paused and said, “You only gotta do what you’re comfortable with, Rach. This is just an awesome position for what I wanna do to you and—”

That sentence was finished when Rachel buried her head between Santana’s legs and ran her tongue directly across the Latina’s clit. In fact, all other conversation was finished for the night as Rachel and Santana rediscovered each other in a way that they hadn’t been able to since the attack, in a way that they hadn’t since that afternoon alone in the closet at McKinley over a month ago.

The hotel room did have a little more space than that closet did, and a whole lot more orgasms for the both of them. It might get them both grounded for being out all night. But the rewards for their relationship? Worth it. After all, they had to celebrate getting crowned with a bang (or two or six).

Santana got smacked in the shoulder by Rachel for that joke. But she got Rachel back as she tossed her over her shoulder and carried her off to their private hotel shower for Round “whatever-number-they-were-on” just as the sky started to lighten with dawn.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Author’s Note: There you go! I hope the long length made up for some of my long absence. Please continue to review. Reviews still inspire me from new and old readers! Thank you again for all of your support for this story.


	18. "Everything Is Perfect"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Disclaimer: Glee is not my property. Though the show has come to an end, officially, I still need to point out that I am not making any money off of this, and I am simply borrowing the characters for my own amusement.
> 
> Author’s note: I know that this update took some time! Life took over, so did work, and then the final season of Glee aired, and well...I got a little distracted. I did not always agree with where the show took some characters, but overall I was left feeling more satisfied than I thought I would about the ending of a show that has given me more than I can say. I am not sure I would have had the courage to post my writing if not for the characters Glee provided. For that, I will be forever grateful. I’m not ashamed to admit that I cried a little when it ended. As this story draws to a close, I am both simultaneously saddened by the idea and excited to see what other ideas I come up with in the future.
> 
> Thank you for being patient, for continuing to read my story (or stories), and supporting me with reviews and subscriptions. I couldn’t have done this without you all. As I kept writing and writing on this one, it ended up being the final chapter. There will be an Epilogue, but please, enjoy!
> 
> ADDITIONAL NOTE: In my story, Blaine is a Senior as well. It never made sense to me when he was suddenly declared a Junior. I assume it was so they could have more stuff at McKinley with him on the show? I don’t think I have ever mentioned otherwise before now.

Chapter 18: "Everything Is Perfect"

After Senior Prom, everything went into overdrive. There was literally no time to stop and breathe as everyone continued to practice non-stop for Nationals. Santana and Rachel tried to get in as much one-on-one time together as they could. So did Kurt and Blaine, Dave and Sebastian, and Brittany and Puck. But besides studying for their finals (as well attending their actual classes), almost all other hours of the day were spent in the choir room or auditorium, endlessly going over the routines.

No one could accuse New Directions of pulling their routines out in the eleventh hour this time around. They had the three numbers they were going to perform chosen months ago, and the dance moves could practically be done in their sleep. Quinn and the other Cheerios were even making sure that Finn looked like he knew what he was doing up on that stage, and Santana was curbing her snarky comments down to one or two a day,  _mostly_ under her breath. Rachel was rewarding her for her efforts in the bedroom – and behind the stage, and in the janitor's closet, and in the Cheerios' locker room, and in the girls' bathroom – so she couldn't really complain. Much. She was too busy smirking and smugly watching her girlfriend try to cover up hickeys with stage makeup to give Finn much thought.

But that wasn't the only thing that both Rachel and Santana forgot to give much thought. A week before Nationals, college acceptance and rejection letters arrived in the mailboxes of all the Glee kids.

Rachel walked to the front of the choir room that afternoon and spoke loud enough for everyone to hear her over the low buzz of discussion.

"It has come to my attention that a few of you have begun to receive your college acceptance letters."

Santana jerked up in her seat at this. The Latina looked a little like a deer caught in the headlights.

"For instance, Santana received letters from both NYU and Julliard two days ago, and I did as well, but I believe she – and I assume many of you all as well – has not yet opened it or revealed this for fear that I will regress or go back into depression over my inability to get into NYADA."

No one could look Rachel in the eye, which was all the answer she needed.

Rachel smiled, not unkindly. "I appreciate the care and caution you all still take with my feelings on this matter. However, I would never want you, my friends and fellow Glee-clubbers, to miss out on your achievements in life because of one missed opportunity in mine." Her smile shifted to self-deprecating, "The old Rachel might have, from Freshman or early Sophomore year, but I like to think that we have all grown up a lot since then."

That received a number of chuckles from around the room, especially from Quinn and Santana.

"So I know you all have your letters in your bags. Why don't we all open them now, together, to support one another, if that's okay with everyone?"

Almost before she had finished speaking, bags were torn open. All the letters, big and small, were out on the floor as everyone gathered around in a circle. Mr. Schue rested his hand on Rachel's shoulder and smiled down at her in support, and she went to sit next to Santana.

Mr. Schue spoke up, "Who wants to go first?"

Brittany raised her hand in the air furiously, and everyone laughed. Leave it to Brittany to dive in headfirst.

"Okay, well, I struggled this semester, since class isn't my best area. But as you guys know the other Cheerios and some of you helped me and Puck with studying, and Coach Sylvester also helped me apply for some cheerleading scholarships. So…let's see!"

Brittany started tearing into the letters in front of her. In the end, she was accepted into the University of Southern California, in Los Angeles, under a cheerleading scholarship.

Puck picked her up and swung her around. "Fuck yeah! You can cheer and go to school, and I can go to Bartending School and work for a while, just like we talked about, Britt! I play and work on my music there, and you can do dance tryouts like you always wanted to on the side, and it'll be amazing!"

"Well, duh, silly. Why else would I apply there?" She looked around at the others. "And people always say I'm the one who doesn't understand things. I sometimes wonder what you all would do without me around to explain stuff to you."

Puck laughed along with everyone else. He pulled Britt's head down for a kiss until Quinn threw an eraser at the back of his head.

"All right, we get it. You're both very happy. Now can you detach for long enough to let other people find out what their futures hold? You're not as bad as Pezberry, but you're close." Quinn rolled her eyes and ducked as Puck threw the eraser back in her direction.

She wasn't prepared for the rolled-up ball of paper that hit her squarely in the forehead when she moved back, though.

Everyone turned to stare at Rachel, including Santana. She shrugged and smirked. "Let's face it, Quinn. If I had let Santana retaliate for your verbal jab, it would have been something a lot harder than a ball of paper. Stage makeup only covers up so much. With Nationals a week away, I simply couldn't risk it. Think of it as you taking one for the team." Rachel quickly covered Santana's mouth before she could say anything. "Do  _not_  make that any dirtier than I intended it, Santana Lopez. I'm sure Mr. Schue wouldn't appreciate it."

Mr. Schue  _did_  look relieved that Rachel had cut Santana off at the pass.

Quinn, however, was too far away for Rachel's hand to reach. The evil look that crossed her face really should have warned Rachel in time to get Dave or Kurt to intercept her, though.

"You're right, Rachel. Stage makeup  _does_  only cover up so much. I mean, you and Santana would know, right? With the amount of it you both have to use daily to cover up the hickeys you give one another, it's surprising you ever even come up for air."

Mr. Schue was definitely embarrassed now. Why did he have to be here again? Sometimes he felt like all he ever did was hear about his kids' sex lives.

Everyone held their breath and waited to see what Santana and Rachel would do about Quinn's verbal barb.

Santana narrowed her eyes and tensed up. Rachel burst out laughing.

Santana unclenched and slung her arm around her girlfriend, and Rachel snuggled into her hold. "You're totally right, Quinn. It is surprising we even make it to class these days, isn't it, Tana?"

"You know it, baby girl. This hotness just cannot be contained." Santana whispered into Rachel's ear smugly, just loud enough to make those closest to her jealous, slightly uncomfortable, horny, or amused (or some combination of all of those feelings mixed together).

Quinn shook her head and poked at the next person to open their letter since she already knew she had gotten into Yale.

Blaine and David both jumped up when they got into NYU. Blaine applied for Tisch and David for the University in general. At this point, he was tired of playing football for anything but fun, and he simply wanted to pursue his academics, which he was surprisingly good at when he put his mind to it.

Kurt tried to contain his excitement when he got his acceptance into NYADA. However, Rachel would have none of it.

"Kurt Hummel, I want you to be as thrilled about this as you would be if I had a chance to get in, okay? You deserve this, Kurt. NYADA and New York are your dream just as much as they are mine. Don't let anyone, not even me –  _especially_ not me – diminish that. It only diminishes you. And nobody who shines as brightly as you do, Kurt, should be diminished."

The two friends shared a hug through their tears (and the ones that the others were trying to subtly wipe away, like Santana and Puck). Sebastian was coughing and encouraging others to hurrying along the letter opening process. He really couldn't handle this sob fest much longer.

Artie was going to film school in Los Angeles, and Mike and Tina both got into Brown, which they had decided to apply to separately. When they pulled out their identical letters everyone laughed and shouted, "Asian-Twins!" and all received glares back from the two of them for the joke. They didn't seem too broken up over the results if their continued lip-lock was anything to go by.

Mercedes was heading out to L.A. without school to give her voice a try, and she would have Brittany and Puck to support her. Joe and Sugar were staying in the area to give college here a try before they made up their minds about what they wanted out of life.

Finn got into the local college, and he was going to be running Burt's garage for him. As he looked over his acceptance letter, and Puck slapped him on the back in congratulations, he glanced up at Rachel. When she gave him a proud smile, he smiled back. Finn realized that this was it. They were both following their dreams, in one way or another, and they weren't compromising themselves to get where they wanted to be in life. This was what Mr. Schue wanted for all of them. They simply had to want it too. Finally, Finn did want a life of his own choosing. Even if he couldn't have the life he thought he wanted with Rachel, he wanted happiness for her.

Sebastian was sitting with the team for these letters, and he glanced at Santana when she seemed to be looking at a letter she was holding onto quite firmly. He moved over to her with his own letter in hand and whispered, "Wanna open them together, Lopez?"

Santana jerked and glared at him in suspicion. "What, no snarky comment, O.W.?"

Sebastian laughed softly. "I think we both know that this is the school we really want to get into, no matter what any of the other letters might say. So I'm game if you are."

"On three?"

On the count of three, they opened their letters together, not realizing that everyone else was staring at them and holding their breath as well. Rachel had a death-grip on Santana's hand, having already opened her letter from Tisch (she got in, of course, and was excited to be attending the school with Blaine, even though it wasn't NYADA).

They froze, read the letters intently, then looked at each other and glanced at each other's letters. Sebastian was the first one to speak.

"Well, fuck."

"Fuck is right." Santana agreed, shaking her head and slapping Sebastian across the back.

"What? What do they say?" Dave was about to tear his hair out since neither he nor Rachel could tell what the letters said from their significant other's facial expressions.

Rachel was taken completely off-guard and shrieked as Santana spun around and scooped her up in her arms, carried her bridal-style around the room and shouted, "Guess who's going to Julliard for Music in the fall,  _hermosa_?"

Sebastian had grabbed ahold of Dave and – in an entirely unlike him public display of affection – kissed his boyfriend  _very_  thoroughly. When they came up for some much-needed air, Dave had just enough presence of mind to ask, "I take it you got in as well, babe?"

"I heard that snicker about the pet name, Lopez, and don't even get me started on how many you and Berry have for each other. Besides, I am too happy right now to really give a flying-fuck. Yeah, I totally got in as well. I have to put up with going to the same school as Lopez. But you and me, Dave, in New York. It's all coming together."

The brilliant smile that broke out on Dave's face was almost heartbreaking to see. As they rested their heads against one another in semi-private moment of joy, everyone in the room could be nothing but happy for the both of them. They had gone through quite a bit of hardship to get together, and their road was nowhere near done, but every sweet moment was one to cherish.

Of course, Santana was the one to break the calm. "All right, you two, we get it. You're in love. We get it. Get a room!"

Quinn's reply was right on point. "Santana, you have no leg to stand on here. We can see your hand on Rachel's ass!"

Mr. Schue could only roll his eyes and laugh softly in resignation as the good-natured bickering continued well into the afternoon. He did sign up for this, and he knew that come the Fall – when he was looking for kids to join New Directions – he would be missing them, baggage and all, more than he could ever really express.

* * *

Nationals. It all comes down to this. The years of shows. The practice. The hopes and dreams.

" _Querida_?" Santana looked up when Rachel called out to her, and her heart skipped a beat.  _Fuck, my girlfriend is gorgeous._  "You okay?"

"I am now. God, I never thought I would be a little bitch about things like this, but I am so fucking nervous about going out there."

Rachel smiled and gripped Santana's hands in hers. "You'll be fantastic. We all will. Remember what you keep telling me. It's all about going out there and having fun. We just sing our hearts out, and the rest is out of our hands."

Santana pulled Rachel into her arms. "I still can't believe you are so Zen about this, baby girl. I thought for sure you'd be freakin'."

"Oh, I'm freaking out on the inside. But we already got into our colleges. So New York is a done deal for the both of us. Nationals? That would just be icing on the cake." With that said, she leaned up and deposited a kiss on Santana's nose.

When Santana tried to follow that up with a real kiss on the lips, Rachel pulled back and teasingly warned, "Tana…I just finished my makeup. Yours is flawless. If we start that now, you know we'll end up destroying all the hard work we did, and we just don't have the time. You can kiss me as much as you want to later."

"Promise?" Santana raised her eyebrows salaciously. She ran her hands up and down Rachel's sides, making it hard for the shorter girl to remember what her argument was in the first place.

"Get the lead out, you two! No fucking up each other's hair or makeup. We're on in ten!" Quinn ran by and shot them both a look, which Santana responded to with the finger.

"It's like she has an anti-sex radar, I swear! Fucking cock-block." Santana grumbled as Rachel laughed and pulled her girlfriend behind her in the direction Quinn had gone towards the room they were all getting ready in.

"Well, don't worry, Tana. I'll make sure Quinn isn't around later tonight to actually cock-block us." Rachel whispered in Santana's ear before she sashayed ahead of Santana down the hall.

"Wait, does that mean what I think it means? Rach? Baby girl?" Santana groaned at the image of getting to use their strap-on in any capacity and ran after her evil – sexy as hell, yes, but  _evil_  – girlfriend.

* * *

Santana and the rest of the Troubletones in Glee started off their Nationals set list, and Rachel watched along with the guys with bated breath. They were doing  _The Edge of Glory_  by Lady Gaga, and they were nothing short of amazing.

Santana, Mercedes, Quinn, and Tina all shined, though Santana started the whole song off, and Rachel could not have been more proud of her voice, her passion, or her confidence.

Santana strutted across the stage, and all Rachel could think was,  _That's my girl._

"There ain't no reason you and me should be alone  
Tonight yeah, baby, tonight yeah, baby  
But I got a reason that you-ou should take me home tonight"

She blushed and blew Santana a kiss from backstage when the Latina sang that last line and looked directly at her, before moving into the next part of the song, ever the flirt.  _That is definitely my girl._

When the song finished and they moved to the back of the stage, Santana had just enough time to slide her fingers through Rachel's as her girlfriend walked past and onto the stage for her solo of  _It's All Coming Back to Me Now_  by Celine Dion. It was the final boost she needed to sing for the first time in front of people other than the Glee club since her attack.

She started out softly, but with power behind her voice, which resonated throughout the theater:

"There were nights when the wind was so cold  
That my body froze in bed  
If I just listened to it  
Right outside the window

There were days when the sun was so cruel  
That all the tears turned to dust  
And I just knew my eyes were  
Drying up forever  _(forever)_

I finished crying in the instant that you left  
And I can't remember where or when or how  
And I banished every memory you and I had ever made"

You could have heard a pin drop, that was how focused everyone was on listening to Rachel.

"But when you touch me like this  
And you hold me like that  
I just have to admit  
That it's all coming back to me"

It was at this moment that Madame Tibideaux strolled down to a seat that Santana had reserved for her (just in case) and Rachel – who had already been smiling with the emotion of her song – could not contain her joy, and slight nervousness, at the sight of her. The emotion she was feeling poured out in her voice, and everyone watching could hear and feel it right along with her.

"It's all coming back to me  
 _(It's all coming back, it's all coming back to me now)_

There were moments of gold  
And there were flashes of light  
There were nights of endless pleasure  
It was more than any laws allowed  
Baby, baby, baby

When you touch me like this  
And when you hold me like that  
It was gone with the wind  
But it's all coming back to me

I can barely recall  
But it's all coming back to me now!"

As the last notes of her voice rang out in the theater, the applause was deafening. Rachel had just enough time to rush past Santana with a whispered, "Did you have something to do with Madame Tibideaux?!" All she got in response was a small smile and a shrug before they had to move right into  _Paradise by the Dashboard Light_  by Meat Loaf for their final number.

It had been agreed upon that Finn and Rachel would do the final song, since it had been his pick. They all actually had a lot of fun putting together the choreography and practicing it as a group. Ultimately, the song was a true group number, and they all agreed that it was a great way to finish off their last official performance.

By the time they finished their performance, everyone in the theater was on their feet, cheering at the top of their lungs. The sound was deafening, and the smiles on all of the New Direction's faces could not be contained.

Vocal Adrenaline was also amazing, with Unique as their star, but all they could really do now was wait and hope. And pray, especially in Joe's case.

All the groups gathered onto the stage once they were told the judges had made their final decision. For the individual MVP award, Unique won, which everyone – even Rachel – thought was well-deserved. Then it came time for the final award announcement.

The Portland Scaleblazers were pronounced the third place winners, and it was down to Vocal Adrenaline and New Directions. The announcer took his time dragging out the verdict. Santana would have been worried that Rachel was going to break her hand at any moment, except that she was squeezing back just as hard. Finally, he declared, "The 2012 National Showchoir Champions…from McKinley High in Lima, Ohio, the New Directons!"

The lip lock that Rachel and Santana shared on stage at the announcement was passionate, but brief, as they screamed and celebrated with all of the friends that they had worked so hard to get to this moment with.

New Directions: National Champions. They were flying high and free. Soon many of them would be flying far from here, just like they had always dreamed about.

* * *

As they were leaving the venue, laughing and chatting about where they all wanted to grab their victory meal, Rachel heard a very distinct cough to their right. This was followed up by the calmest and drollest, "Ms. Berry?" that Rachel had ever heard. She and Santana froze, as did Kurt and a few of the others who had been on the road trip with them, and they motioned the other Glee kids to hold up as well.

"Deep breaths,  _hermosa_. You got this." Santana used the arm that was around her girlfriend's shoulder and spun them both to face none other than Madame Tibideaux herself.

"Madame Tibideaux, what a lovely surprise!"

Madame Tibideaux nodded and stated, "Ms. Berry, may I just say: I generally do not admit when I make mistakes. In fact, I generally do not need to, because I do not often make mistakes." She paused, looking over at Santana. "However, Ms. Lopez came to me and told me the reason for your missed audition, and that I would be making a huge mistake if I did not come and hear you perform, and that I would be missing out on something incredible by not hearing you sing. I'll admit, I was intrigued, since in all my years of teaching I don't think I have ever had someone other than the person trying to get in, or their parents, pursue me quite so intensely." That got a soft laugh from Rachel, and Santana just shrugged.

"After seeing you perform today, I can state without a doubt that it would have been a grievous mistake indeed if I had missed this opportunity. And, though I can't say it officially yet, we at NYADA would be poorer without you and your voice. I really do not want to add a second mistake to my list so soon. Congratulations on the Nationals win, Ms. Berry, and we will see you in the Fall." With that, she turned around and walked off with her head high and possibly a bit of a spring in her step.

Rachel stood in shock for about 30 seconds, as did the rest of the Glee club, before the pandemonium of celebration broke through their ranks yet again.

* * *

"National Champions and NYADA all in one day? God, I feel like I'm in some sort dream, 'Tana."

"Well, if you're dreamin', then I am too, Rach."

Rachel unlinked her hand long enough from Santana's so that she could open the front door to her house. Her fathers had decided to stay in Chicago for the weekend to celebrate their anniversary after watching their performance at Nationals, as long as the girls promised not to have a party, and not to get into any sort of trouble that would involve the police being called.

Otherwise, they had been given what could be called "free reign" of the Berry household. As Leroy put it, they wouldn't be there to chaperone in New York soon enough as it was. So the girls might as well have a safe place to be together to "celebrate." That was about all both girls could take before the embarrassment of the conversation became too much. They had walked out of the room with Hiram shouting after them, "Just make sure to continue to take care of my little girl, Santana! No rush, but we would like some grandchildren before we're too old to lift them!"

Rachel chuckled, low and sultry, "Well, you definitely won't be dreaming about this next part of the day,  _querida_."

"Oh, really?" Santana arched her brow and stalked after her girlfriend, who was making her way up the stairs.

"Well, if you could take your eyes off my ass for two seconds you would remember that I promised you that you wouldn't be 'cock-blocked' tonight. Did you forget that, Tana?"

Santana caught up to Rachel and wrapped her arms around her at the top of the stairs. "Oooh, that's right. I've been looking forward to that."

"Me too, baby, me too." Rachel pulled Santana in for a kiss and then dragged her into the bedroom. She pushed the taller brunette to sit on the bed and whispered, "I'll be right back, Tana. Why don't you get comfortable?"

Rachel slid into the bathroom with a bag that held some of their toys, and Santana unzipped her dress, tossing it over the back of a chair. She slid back on Rachel's bed in her matching red lace bra and thong ( _could it be another color?_ ), and waited for her beautiful girlfriend to come out.

"Santana? I want you to close your eyes, okay? You can't open them until I say so."

"All right."

"Santana, are they really closed?"

"Yes, they're really closed."

Santana took a sharp breath inward as she felt Rachel climb onto the bed and slowly crawl up the bed. Not only could she feel that Rachel was completely naked, but she could also feel the strap-on as it dragged up her body.

"Fuck, Rach, how long are you going to tease me?"

"Not much longer, I promise. You can open your eyes, at least."

Santana opened her eyes and looked up at one of the hottest – and most beautiful – sights: Rachel, straddling her stomach wearing a cock that was ready and waiting to fuck her.  _Jesus Christ_.

"You, Santana Lopez, are the most amazing person in the entire world." At her quizzical look, Rachel smiled down at Santana. "You don't even think what you did was anything special, do you? Santana, we have been together through so much already, but, when I tried to go out and audition for NYADA, you didn't take no for an answer. You went out and convinced Carmen Tibideaux herself to come to Nationals to hear me sing. You got me into NYADA, Tana."

"You got  _yourself_  into NYADA, baby girl. I just helped get Madame Tibideaux there to hear you."

Rachel laughed. "Well, I love you for it. And I am going to show you just how hot this entire day of victories has truly made me. You are going to get a great gift for being the best girlfriend ever, Santana."

With those words, and barely enough time to moan at the thought, Rachel ran her hands through Santana's hair for a passionate kiss. She traced Santana's lower lip with her tongue, and both girls moaned as their tongues tangled with one another. Santana's hands moved down Rachel's sides and gripped her ass, grinding her pelvis – and cock – into her own pelvis. Santana threw her head back on a moan, and Rachel pulled back from the kiss with a final nibble on the Latina's lower lip.

"Mmmm, a little impatient for your gift?"

"I'm always impatient for you, Rach."

Rachel made her way down Santana's body, leaving love bites and hickeys along the way that would definitely have needed stage-level make-up to cover up, if not for being on parts of her body that are normally covered.

"Have I mentioned I really love your choice in lingerie, Tana?" This was said while Rachel was peeling down Santana's red lace long, leaving more bites down her thighs as she went.

"You might have— _mierda—_ mentioned it once or twice."

Rachel ran her tongue through Santana's folds once or twice, at which point Santana was gripping the sheets hard enough to almost rip them. "Well, I was going to get you off once before fucking you really long and hard with this cock, baby, but it looks like you are  _more_  than wet enough for me." All Santana could do was nod furiously.

That was all the encouragement the shorter diva needed. She slid up the bed and used one hand to pull Santana into a deep kiss. With the other, she guided the tip of the strap-on into her girlfriend. The moan they both let out as Rachel sank deep into Santana was so loud it reverberated around the room.

" _Mierda—tan profundo!_ " Santana gasped and dug her nails into Rachel's ass, holding her still, getting used to the feeling of being so stretched."

"I know,  _mi chica sucia_. Can you feel how deep my cock is inside you? Fuck, Tana, it feels so good." Rachel could feel it every time Santana flexed or moved around the fake cock, since the strap-on was double-ended.

Once she'd taken a few minutes to adjust, Santana opened her eyes, brought her hands up around Rachel's neck, and said, "Let's celebrate those victories, baby girl."

With a smile, Rachel began to slowly pull all the way back, and then thrust back in, harder and harder, until Santana was writhing under her. As Santana's legs started to tremble around her waist, a sure sign that she was close – and Rachel felt pretty close herself – she reached down with her right hand and ran her thumb along Santana's clit.

"Come on, Santana, I know you're close. Can you feel me inside you, fucking you deep? So fucking good, taking my cock like this. Fuck, Santana, I just want you to come all over my cock."

With those words and a few more flicks across her clit, Santana came  _hard_. "Shit, Rach, oh, God, yes, so good!  _Dios mio!_ " Rachel came at the sight of her girlfriend reaching her peak, and she bit down on Santana's shoulder at the unexpected onset of her own orgasm.

Rachel rolled over, and Santana went with her, so that this time the Latina was straddling her. The strap-on was still inside Santana. As they caught their breath, Santana laughed, "Shit, we didn't even get my bra off."

Rachel sat up slightly and dropped soft, light kisses on Santana's lips. "Well, that is easily taken care of, see?" She undid her bra with one hand and dropped it off the side of the bed. She then placed more kisses along Santana's collarbones.

Santana kissed the top of Rachel's head and was about to suggest they lie down when she sucked in a breath: Rachel had gone over the place on her shoulder that she bit down on when she came, and while it was sensitive, it was also a turn-on.

"Mmm, you're playing with fire, baby girl."

"Maybe I want to play with fire. We are celebrating after all."

Santana wrapped her arms around Rachel and started to rotate her hips, moving the strap-on inside her, as well as her girlfriend. They both moaned, and Rachel's kisses turned to small bites once more.

"Fuck, Tana, who's the tease now?"

"Only if I don't plan on following through with it, Rach. It's called the slow build up, baby girl, and I am the master of building you up slowly until you  _pop_." The last part she whispered into Rachel's ear while thrusting down onto the cock, and  _grinding_ , causing them both to gasp and be drawn into yet another passionate kiss.

They built each other up, slow and fast, all weekend long. Victory never tasted so sweet.

* * *

The day before graduation, Mr. Schue was truly honored and surprised when he won the Teacher of the Year award. As he prepared to stand up and accept the award, Finn appeared on the stage in his Nationals outfit.

"Hey, Mr. Schue. I was going to say a few words to tell you how much you have meant to all of us, as a mentor and a teacher, but we all voted and decided that the two people who have changed the most this past year, and have shaped our group – our family – the most should really get the chance to do that. We didn't tell them that, so try not to hold this next part against them. Rachel? Santana?"

People in the audience chuckled as – also both in their Nationals dresses – Rachel came onto the stage from the back, pulling Santana along. Rachel nudged Santana to go first.

"Well, crap. Finn (a sharp jab from Rachel's elbow got her to cut off any name puns), I am so getting you back for this. All right, I guess I'm known for being brutally honest, so here it is, Mr. Schue. I'm pretty badass. Three years ago, I thought I had it all. One of the three top Cheerios, and all the boys I could want hanging off of me. More popularity than I knew what to do with, and everyone I walked across at this school feared me. I mean, what more could I want, right?" That drew a laugh from the crowd, especially Rachel at her side.

"However, the reality was that I hated myself. I hated the idea of anyone knowing that I was a lesbian. So I made sure that I didn't let anyone close enough to figure me out. But Glee club made keeping boundaries and walls up impossible. I joined New Directions to help break it down from the inside. In the end, New Directions ended up breaking me down, and then putting me back together again as a much better person. That was thanks to all of the friends I made, to my girlfriend Rachel who never let any of us give up, no matter how much it annoyed the crap out of us" – that got her a light slap on the shoulder and a glare – "but it's mostly due to you, Mr. Schue. You created New Directions as a safe place for us to not just sing, but to dream, and you are one of the main reasons we're pursuing our dreams now."

When it looked like Santana was actually going to start crying in front of the entire school, Rachel took over, even though she was a little more than choked up as well. "So let us sing to you one last time as the original New Directions, Mr. Schue, to honor not just your award as the Teacher of the Year, but as the teacher who has helped shape our futures. For that, we will  _forever_  be grateful. Thank you."

There was not a dry eye in the house, on stage or off, by the time they finished their rendition of  _We Are the Champions_  by Queen. Mr. Schue pulled Rachel and Santana into the final of his hugs, after Finn, and whispered, "Thank you. I am so proud, and I know you guys are going to make me even prouder with everything you accomplish in your lives."

Santana really did cry then, but only Mr. Schue and Rachel would ever know.

* * *

"Why did I agree to this again?"

"Because, Santana, it'll be an 'adventure!' " This was done in Sebastian's best interpretation of Rachel, and Santana couldn't help but chuckle while rolling her eyes.

"Oh, come on, guys. We've been doing nothing but finals, graduation, and packing for the last week straight. I think this train ride will be a nice time for us all to just hang out together before New York sweeps us up, you know?" Blaine was trying his best to be encouraging as they watched Kurt and Rachel work to stuff yet  _another_  bag onto the train.

"Yeah, there's bonding. And then there's 17 hours on a train together. Thank God we sprang for the sleeper cars. I still can't believe we fell for the 'A train ride across the country will be much more romantic than a simple plane ride' line."

"We?" This time Sebastian was raising his eyebrow.

"Please, the minute Dave started to get all excited you were hooked. And don't even get me started on Kurt gushing about how it would be like in old films, Warbler. We were all goners the minute the three of them suggested it. I mean, we even agreed to it when it involved driving us all to Bryan first,  _then_  getting on the train!"

A big sigh of resignation came from Dave. "We are so whipped."

Sebastian finally agreed. "And doomed to repeat our mistakes every time they bat their eyes and pout even a little."

Santana just nodded in agreement, and they went to join the others in saying their goodbyes as the last of the luggage was  _finally_  loaded onto the train.

Those leaving for New York were the first to go since they would spend the summer looking for apartments, work, and getting to know the city. Quinn would be leaving for New Haven (via the sensible plane option through New York or Hartford) in a week, after spending a little bit more time with Beth, and the others would be heading to Los Angeles or Providence not long after.

Rachel got a promise out of Quinn – and strangely enough vice versa – to visit as often as possible, and everyone else promised to stay in touch regularly. Kurt's dad stood nearby, barely holding it together with both Finn and Carol for support. Rachel's fathers and Santana's parents were holding each other up as they tried not to cry  _too_  much. Mr. Schue and Ms. Pillsbury stood by with happy smiles on their faces as Kurt ("Stop pushing, Blaine, I'm going"), Blaine, Sebastian, Dave (whose father was also there, supremely happy that his son was alive and pursuing love and a future for himself), Santana, and finally Rachel all boarded the train.

As the others jostled for prime seats in the cabins they had reserved and fought about who would have the first choice of music, Santana noticed Rachel looking out the window, lost in thought.

"You okay,  _hermosa?_ "

"Why wouldn't I be? I love you, and we're on our way to New York." Rachel smiled and brought Santana's hand to her lips, kissing it softly. "Everything is perfect."

"I love you too, Rachel." Santana smile softly. "However, if you look lovingly into my eyes much longer, you might miss out on the song selection for the trip."

Rachel gasped and rushed over to get in on the intense "discussion." As Santana followed her, she looked out the window herself as the train pulled away from the station, heading towards their future.

"Yeah. Everything is perfect."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Additional author’s note: There it is, folks! The end. At least the end of high school before my epilogue. I hope you have loved this ride as much as I have, and I am sorry it took me so long to get us all here. Thank you for being a part of this with me, and please review!


	19. Epilogue: “I Share This With You, Always.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Disclaimer: I still don’t own Glee.
> 
> Additional note 12/16/15: I meant to make a Beta change about the EGOT (that Rachel would not receive it until after her shared Grammy with Santana) but I forgot to adjust it apparently before posting. A lovely reviewer in on AO3 mentioned this and I wanted to correct it ASAP. I apologize if you thought I was updating something new, or anything, but perhaps now you can just reread it - I did adjust the lines a little right around that section, but nothing extreme. Thanks so much!
> 
> Author’s note: Here it is! The Epilogue is finally here, and Ditto has finally come to an end. Thank you all so very much for sticking with this story for so long. I started this back when Season 3 was still airing. The first chapter was posted on Fanfiction.net on May 9, 2012, just after Prom-asaurus aired. To this day, I have favorite episodes in between, but Season Three stands as my favorite. I can’t say that I always agree with where Ryan Murphy took the show and characters. Then again, I don’t know what I would have done if one of my leads died mid-show either, so I can’t really throw stones. I can say that Naya Rivera and her portrayal of Santana truly shone that season. And when Dave tried to kill himself? It gets me every time.
> 
> Anyway, I could go on for quite a while, but here is what I want to say. I wanted to thank Glee for its portrayal of the struggle all teen go through, but especially the struggles of LGBT teens. I have mentioned this in parts throughout my notes, and I hope it showed in my story. Your best storylines truly shined. You made me laugh, cry, and sing along.
> 
> Thank you. I can only hope that I have – at least in some small part – done the same.
> 
> Enjoy.

Epilogue: “I Share This With You, Always.”

* * *

“Hurry up, bitches. It’s starting!”

“Santana Marie Lopez, there are children present!”

“Oh, please, they are all asleep or falling asleep. Besides, most of them are too young to even know what that word means. And if they are old enough, they should know how to use it properly. That way they can know who is a bitch and who isn’t.”

Kurt quirked his brow as he came out of the back bedroom where he and Blaine had just finished tucking in their three-year-old twins, Audrey and James.

“I hate to ask, but what would be the proper situation for my children to use the term ‘bitch,’ Santana?”

Smirking, she replied, “Well, if James were to say, ‘That Uncle Finn sure is a little bitch…”

Loud laughter rang around the room as Rachel shouted (softly and in a sing-song voice), “Santana…he is still a friend, and he is related to your niece and nephew in some capacity! You can’t teach them that!”

“Ugh, don’t remind me! This group just gets more and more incestuous every day! Now get your cute ass out here, Berry-Lopez. We needs to start this up before I get to drunk to remember it at all.”

Rachel laughed as she came into the living room, followed by Quinn and Marley. They had been helping her get the last of the food to accompany all the alcohol they already had for the large gathering. Thank God her and Santana’s house was so huge. They had just purchased the penthouse with a couple of extra bedrooms, two soundproof studios so they could work on different types of music and acting simultaneously, and a host of other amenities to which Rachel was not yet accustomed. Santana was “helping” her by insisting they break in each room by having sex on every surface possible. Not that Rachel was complaining. At all.

“Oh, chill out, S.” Quinn snorted. “We have this on TiVo. It’s not like there’s any chance we could miss any of it. Besides, if we don’t bring in the food now, you know you’re just going to bitch at us to get it for you in about 15 minutes when you get hungry.”

Quinn set down the food she was carrying, made Marley do the same, and then pulled the brunette down into her lap.

At 28, Quinn was a playwright in New York. She had come out the summer between freshmen and sophomore year at Yale, when it became obvious that she was visiting Lima for more reasons than just to see Beth. She and Marley, one of the new sophomore members of New Directions, had been spending a lot of time together. They had been together ever since. Santana made _endless_ mini-Rachel jokes at Quinn’s expense. But the jokes stopped when Rachel asked Santana if the Latina _wanted_ Quinn to hit on her, rather than Quinn’s mini-me girlfriend. Things had worked out. Why give anyone ideas, you know?

Marley, with the help of Quinn and the other strong women around her, quickly grew into her own. She was making her way as a singer in small clubs and making a name for herself. In fact, one of the clubs that she often sang in was owned and operated by Puck and Dave.

Puck moved to New York with Brittany after she finished college, where she was a choreographer. Puck co-owns and runs the music for a local bar and club where they all hang out. Why not, when you know the owners? Dave co-owns and manages the club, while Sebastian runs a theater. The former Warbler produces and stars in shows that, he feels, have a lot of promise. He’s earned a reputation for producing great names like Rachel and Santana Berry-Lopez.

Rachel shook her head as she thought about all of it. She looked around at all of her friends – their family – that had come to watch this tonight. Many lived in the area. But those that did not were watching it at home, since the event really was unprecedented.

Sugar, Joe, and Finn were all still in Lima. They seemed happy with their lives. Finn, especially, had thrived as the New Directions head coach once Mr. Schue went on to other things (including his own growing family). The team and McKinley had only grown. Finn had found a nice girl – who was nothing at all like Rachel, thank God – and he was running Burt’s garage as well as teaching. She was a stay-at-home mom. They had four kids with one more on the way.

Mercedes was still touring around. She visited New York when she got a chance. She and Sam had reconnected a few years ago. They were married now and thinking about having children of their own. Apparently, he was really cool with the idea of being a stay-at-home (or on-the-bus) dad, and Rachel was very happy for them. Thinking back on their wedding, Rachel laughed softly at the memory of the party _that_ had been. Her voice was gone by the end of the night from the sing-offs between her, Mercedes, and ’Tana. You can take the girls out of Glee club, but you can’t take that inner Diva out of the girls.

Tina and Mike were living on the West Coast. They moved there after graduating from Brown and dance school, respectively. They were happy as ever with two kids of their own. She and ’Tana were going to visit them in the summer when they were on the West Coast for the “Big Event” as they kept calling it.

Artie was working in the film industry as a director. He had been instrumental in helping Rachel finalize her dream. Rachel was instrumental, in turn, with helping Artie continue his own career by using her growing fame and popularity in the industry for his projects. He had visited Lima a few times during his college years to check on his mom. When he was back in Ohio, he ran into a New Directions girl named Kitty. They’d hit it off. He was considering asking her to marry him, but he wasn’t quite sure she would accept yet. She insisted he wasn’t ready to fully settle down. As Santana walked past them, she rolled her eyes at the pair. Kitty was sitting comfortably on his lap.

Kurt, who was cuddled up with his husband Blaine on the extra-long couch next to Quinn and Marley, had become a costume designer for Broadway shows. His work had become so well-known that his designs became prevalent in the world of fashion. Blaine became an actor. He performs regularly at Sebastian’s theater, and he helps run the theater and the bar which Dave and Puck own.

Finally, Rachel was pulled from her musings as her wife of four years grabbed her and pulled her down onto her _own_ lap to sit next to Kurt and Blaine. Dave and Sebastian had taken the love seat, and Brittany and Puck had one of the lounge chairs.

“Remind me again why we got all this furniture, and such a large place, if we are all just going to sit on each other’s laps, ’Tana?”

Rachel joked into Santana’s ear as she simultaneously snuggled further into the comfortable spot on the Latina’s lap.

Pulling her even closer, Santana kissed the top of Rachel’s head and shushed her as she pushed play on the TiVo.

“Shh, I hear there are some hot-ass bitches who are on this special tonight.”

“Now that,” laughed Sebastian, “is the proper use of the word ‘bitch’, B.L.”

* * *

“Hello, everyone! I’m here today with you on _Ellen_ , and I have some very special guests for you! Now, I say ‘special’ because they are amazing when they’re not in the same room with one another. But after a lot of pleading on my part… I think I might owe someone my kidney? I’m still a little unclear on that front. After a lot of pleading, we have them both here to speak with us. Please welcome, Santana Berry-Lopez and Rachel Berry-Lopez!”

Music started up and out danced Santana and Rachel. Santana spun Rachel around before they sat down in the chairs across from Ellen DeGeneres. The crowd was going wild. All three women smiled as they waved to everyone.

“How are you two? You look fabulous, by the way.”

“Thank you so much, Ellen! You look lovely!”

“Thanks, we try. Though, you know, you should always introduce Rach first. Otherwise, she might get snotty. You know what a Diva she can be.” Santana laughed as Rachel took a joking swipe at her arm with an affronted look on her face.

Ellen laughed. “I’ll make sure to remember that, Santana. This really is a momentous occasion. You two have done the rounds for publicity. But even for work you’ve done together, I don’t think you’ve ever given a shared interview – at least not officially.”

Rachel smiled. “No, we haven’t. We try to keep our personal and professional lives as separate as we can. I’m sure you can understand and relate. However, that does become harder when _so much_ of our personal lives are mixed with our professional lives. We figured if we spoke to you about something like this, it might mollify some of the press that have been begging us to speak to them.”

“Plus, you’re cool. So it’s not the worst way to spend an afternoon, you know?” Santana smirked.

“Well, thank you, Santana. Did you hear that, everyone? Santana Berry-Lopez, who is notoriously hard to impress, thinks I’m cool. Take that, world!”

“Anyway, we don’t have too many questions for you two today. But I did actually want to do a bit of a clip show if you will. You both gave me permission to show these. I just think it’s truly astounding. I know these scenes are real, but you really have to see them to believe them. I thought I would run them all, back-to-back, and then we can run through a couple of questions. Sound good?

Rachel nodded. Santana said, “Hit it.”

Ellen turned to the screen and the audience. “Without further ado, here are some clips that show the amazing careers of today’s guests, Rachel and Santana Berry-Lopez.”

Rachel Berry’s Test Tony acceptance speech (6 Years Old):

“Thank you so much for this Tony Award! I have always wanted to receive a Tony. And to get one for playing this iconic role first played by my heroine Barbra Streisand, words can’t express my feelings. I would like to thank my fathers for always letting my star shine at its brightest.”

Rachel Berry’s Test Tony acceptance speech (15 Years Old):

“Thank you for this unique honor. I…have struggled in my life to be accepted. To finally have my talent recognized with this Tony Award, I cannot even say how much it means to me. I would like to thank my fathers for always letting my star shine at its brightest.”

Rachel Berry-Lopez’s Tony acceptance speech (24 Years Old):

Won for Best Performance by an Actress in a Leading Role in a Musical – Fanny Bryce in _Funny Girl_

“For people who know me, it should come as no surprise that I used to practice this speech when I was younger. (laughter in the crowd) However, my draft versions were…a little self-centered and very lonely. I know I could still have made it to this stage and accepted this Tony, but I don’t think I would have made it this soon, or been nearly this happy, without the people in my life. Thank you so much for this honor – an honor I have wanted all my life. Most especially thank you to my fathers for their endless love and support, and to my friends who have been there for me through it all. Finally, I would never have made it here at this time if not for my gorgeous and talented new wife. Santana, I love you, and I share this Tony with you.”

Santana Berry-Lopez’s Grammy Acceptance speech (25 Years Old):

Grammy Award for Best New Artist

“Damn, I really didn’t expect this. I should’ve, because last year you won the Tony, Rachel. We are nothing if not competitive. (audience laughs) It’s funny, but that’s really the only reason I’m standing up here today: because a short, competitive singer challenged me to be the best that I could be. So I’d like to thank you all for this Grammy, which I never thought I’d deserve, let alone receive. I would like to thank my family for driving me crazy enough to want to study hard and leave home. Thank you for loving me even when I came out in a small town like Lima, Ohio. Thank you to our friends and the rest of Glee. You made me love singing, despite all my protests about its unpopularity. And last, but never, ever least: Rachel, _mi hermosa esposa_. As I said before, without you driving me, I would not be accepting this Grammy. I’m thankful every day for your presence in my life. Like you said in your Tony acceptance speech, I share this with you.”

Rachel Berry-Lopez’s Emmy Acceptance speech (26 Years Old):

Outstanding Guest Actress in a Comedy Series – guest starring role on _Modern Family_

“Wow, I did not think I’d get an Emmy for this role, but I am very grateful! I had a wonderful time playing the cousin no one knew they had on _Modern Family_ , especially her eccentricity when she just would not leave. I hope she comes back to spend more time with the crew in a future episode, or did she ever leave? (laughter) I had an amazing time with playing her and spending time with the entire cast and crew of the show. Thank you, as always, to my family, my friends, and my wife Santana. Yes, you _all_ inspired this character. Oh, and ’Tana? I share this with you.”

Rachel Berry-Lopez’s Golden Globe Acceptance speech (27 years old):

Best Actress – Motion Picture Drama – _Silence_

“There are no words. I mean that figuratively, and literally, for this character. It is an honor to accept this award. I accept it on behalf of all women who are unable to share their voices with the world. _Silence_ is about speaking up for women, for the oppressed, for those who have no voice or cannot be heard. Write, sing, speak up, speak out, shout at the top of your lungs. I thank you all for this award. Thanks to my family and friends for their love and continued support, and I want to thank you, Santana, for being one woman who was never silent. I share this with you.”

Rachel Berry-Lopez’s Academy Award Acceptance speech (27 years old)

Best Actress in a Leading Role – _Silence_

“I…I can’t. I just won an Academy Award, one of my dreams, one of  _many people’s_ dreams, and I have nothing to say but that I am so, so thankful for all that I have been blessed with. This was the role of a lifetime – to be a reporter in a war-torn future where women are never allowed to speak. She writes down all she would say if she could. _Silence_ moved me, and I am thrilled beyond measure that you were moved by it as well. If I could have one wish, it would be for no one to be silenced. I can only hope that we can work to achieve this in our world. To all my loved ones: my heart is with you, and I thank you all. Santana, I’m going to cry. I know you are out there crying right now too, even if you are going to deny it later. All I am going to say is I love you, and I sh-share this with you, _querida._ ”

Rachel and Santana Berry-Lopez Grammy Acceptance speech (shared) (28 years old):

Grammy Award for Song of the Year

“Okay, so Rach and I decided I would go first on this one, since, you know, she’s had a lot of speech time in the last couple of years. I’m not gonna turn my head, but is she glaring at the side of my head right now? I’m totally sleeping on the couch tonight. Anyway, we want to thank you all for this awesome award - even though it did finally get Rachel that EGOT she's been hoping for, which I'm just never going to live down. Yeah, that comment is definitely getting me on the couch. Honestly though, we just sat down together in the studio at home and started singing about what makes the two of us work, despite it all, and this song is what came of it. _Choke_ came from a place of overcoming heartache and overwhelming love. It rocks that you all seemed to love listening to it as much as we loved creating it.”

Rachel leaned over and said, “We love you all. Thank you for embracing love in all its forms! Also, since I know you expect it: we do – as always – share this award with each other.”

Then Rachel and Santana walked off the stage, hand in hand, holding their shared award. This was also the end of the clip show.

“Rachel, Santana, you have literally taken the world by storm the last four years. Rachel, you’re the youngest person ever to EGOT! You beat Robert Lopez, one of the composers of _Frozen_ , by 11 years! Santana, you have two Grammys under your belt. With the upcoming Tonys, you could be adding another award to your shelf. To what do you owe your success? I mean, we can see from the clips that you both cite each other as one large, guiding factor. Is there anything else?”

“’Tana, you want to take this?”

“You go first. I’ll cut in if you miss anything.”

Rachel shook her head at Santana’s never-ending antics. “We do, as you mentioned, always list one another in our acceptance speeches. I don’t think we would be where we are without each other. In my case, that very well could have been literally. Like we sang in _Choke_ , I was attacked in high school by an unhinged bully who took offense at our relationship. He damaged my throat so badly that that I had to have surgery. I wasn’t sure I would be able to sing again. Santana and some of our friends are the ones who found me in time to save my life. It’s one of the reasons we are sitting here today. However, past that, we have always, and will always, support each other in every project that we do.”

“We also happen to have some pretty damn talented and determined friends. We’ve all kind of helped the others to get us where we are today, you know?” Santana added as she ran her thumb along the back of Rachel’s hand in support.

Ellen nodded enthusiastically, taking the reins and moving into the main reason Rachel and Santana were on her show for this interview. “Yes! You do have quite a number of talented, and famous, friends. Artie Abrams directed _Silence_ , and we all know that Quinn Fabray, Sebastian Smythe, and Blaine Anderson – who is married to _Silence’s_ costume designer Kurt Anderson – are all up for their own Tonys this year just like the two of you. Let’s talk about that musical, shall we?”

Rachel laughed and turned to Santana. “You have the floor. It was you and Quinn’s baby, after all. You are the lead actress.”

“Ellen, if you had seen known us in our sophomore year of high school, that statement would have had your jaw on the floor. Rachel Berry letting someone else have the chance to speak about a Tony-nominated musical she’s in? Anyway, yes, Q – Quinn – had been frustrated that there wasn’t enough theater that really had a lot to say, at least not the stuff she wanted to hear. We were hanging out one night listening to _Choke_ for, like, the thousandth time, because we were perfecting it. Quinn said that she wanted theater to say the same stuff that _Choke_ did – stuff like what we’d all experienced in high school. I joked back, ‘Sure, Q, you could totally write that shit. Call it _Teen Pregnancy, God, and Lesbianism_. Put it to music, have me and Rach star in it, and you’d have Tony gold right there.’ She got this really scary-passionate look on her face. The rest, as they say, is Tony-nominated history.”

Ellen was almost on the floor with laughter. “You’re kidding! She’s kidding, right?”

Rachel shook her head, also laughing. “I came home the next day. I was out visiting with some friends. I came in, and they were about 50 pages into writing the book for _Silence_. ’Tana was working on some of the music. She had called Sebastian and Blaine who looked more rumpled than I had ever seen them. However, they were all passionately working on the show. By the end of the day, they had me roped into the project. By the end of the week, they had a really rough draft of the musical. And it all started with one joking, drunken conversation between high school friends in our living room.”

“Why did you decide to star in it, Santana?”

“I really didn’t want to, at first. I mean, this is really mostly Q’s story – the pregnancy, the late coming out, the struggles with religion. But as we worked through more and more of it, both Rach and Q pointed out that it was a combination of all of our stories: bullying, Glee club, love of music, faith. Ultimately, it’s about the family that we’ve become. Q really wanted me to take the lead. So I did. When it came time to cast the love interest, it only made sense for Rach to do it, since our voices blend well. We can both act the shit out of the roles. We auditioned others, but casting us was really the only casting that made sense.”

“Well, I’ve seen it, and you are both amazing. The Tony nominations for all of you are very well-deserved. As many of you may know, the Tonys are in about a month. The musical we’ve been discussing is _This Little Child of Mine: Teen Pregnancy, God, and Lesbianism_ , which has gotten rave reviews and an enormous fan following since its premiere on Broadway nine months ago. Santana is nominated for Best Performance by an Actress in a Leading Role in a Musical. Rachel is nominated for Best Performance by an Actress in a Featured Role in a Musical. And Quinn is nominated for Best Book of a Musical. Finally, Quinn, Rachel, Santana, Sebastian, and Blaine are all nominated for Best Musical for writing the lyrics and music together. And yes, they are all only 28 years old.

Before I let you go, I have to say, good luck. What you have got on tap for the future after the Tonys? I heard a rumor that you two might be doing a collaboration with Marley Rose, the regular performer at Club Directions, and wife of Quinn Fabray?”

Rachel looked over at Santana. With a nod from the Latina, she replied with a slow smile on her face. “Yes, we are working on a new album with Marley, since we wanted a little down time after the intensity of the Broadway run. We are also going to need a bit of down time, because, while I did carry twins for Blaine and Kurt years ago when I was 25, we’ve decided to have children of our own.”

“Good thing, too, since I just found out I’m pregnant. Be kinda weird if we hadn’t planned that.”

As Ellen congratulated the couple profusely, and the audience cheered so loudly it was hard to hear anything else, everyone in the room turned to them and shouted, “WHAT?!”

Puck was the only one who shouted, “Sweet! I knew my swimmers could get the job done a second time!”

“God, our group is so incestuous” is the only really coherent thought Santana had before Rachel pulled her into a deep kiss, which was punctuated by laughter as the noise level in the room only increased. Their friends could wait for answers, kissing seemed more important right now.

“I love you, Santana Berry-Lopez.”

“Ditto, Rachel Berry-Lopez. Ditto.”

* * *

To no one’s surprise, _This Little Child of Mine: Teen Pregnancy, God, and Lesbianism_ swept all the categories in which it was nominated.

Santana and Rachel finished each of their speeches with “I share this with you, always.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The end! I know, lots of awards. I like to think of it as Glee-lievable (like the real ending of Glee, in many ways)! Three-and-a-half years later, I am finally done with Ditto. I never planned on taking this long to finish this story. Life threw me a few curves, a few moves across the city, and then one move across the country. But I just wanted to thank all of my readers, old and new. You have been an amazing inspiration. I am working on original work now, but I’m planning to come back to fanfic for fun. Keep your eyes on AO3 and Fanfiction.net if you’re interested. Thanks again, and please review!


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